The Gule [Holy Linearist Document]

THE GULE

The Gule is the document of Linearism. If thou pledge allegience to the religious views of Linearism, you must follow this book like the law. Commandment I: Thou shalt ignoreth interviews with creators[especially the false prophet, Aonuma] Commandment II: If Splitists teaseth thou for believeth in Linearism, thou must stick with it. Commandment III:Thou Shalt Not practice Splitism, everth![this means no making up Split theories] Commandment IV: You must not leteth a Splitist convince thou of the Split. Commandment V: Thou Must never renounce your faith, even in death. I'll edit and continue later. If anyone wants to become a member of my faith, tell me, and thou shalt recieve a copy of The Gule that I'll PM you. Now, heres why thou should be Linearist: becauseth it's easier, and the Split Timeline is complicateth and stupideth. And thee false propheteth, Aonuma, contradicteth himself all the timeth.

Can someone ****ing ban this guy already? Jesus.

The guy who made the game doesn't know the story!!!11

Man, we told you once before, that there is no Linear line for the Timeline. All you do is promote flaming because we're trying to tell you your mistake.

I'm sorry if you catch this is being mean, but fricken stop with the linearism stuff.

So if splits don't exist, then someone splitting your head open wouldn't exist either, right?

I meant the Split Timeline, Orangefreak.

Since words on a screen cannot convey emotion; my above post was "typed" with complete sarcasm.

Zelda: TIME WARS

Episode III

REVENGE OF THE SPLIT

War! The Line is crumbling
under attacks by the ruthless
Split Lord, Eiji Aonuma.
There are heroes on both sides.
Evil is everywhere.

In a stunning move, the
fiendish Split leader, Cloaked
Mystery, has swept into the
Linearist capital and kidnapped
LOZ Historian, leader of
the United Wise Men.

As the United Splitist Elders
attempt to flee the besieged
capital with their valuable
hostage, two Hylian Knights lead a
desperate mission to rescue the
captive UWM LEADER.
I'm sorry, I'm feeling like STARWARS at the moment...

This is ridiculous. The timeline isn't a religion. The linear timeline is dead, just get over it.

Man, some people accused the UWM of treating the timeline like a religion, but this dude actually does...

Originally Posted by Sentient

This is ridiculous. The timeline isn't a religion. The linear timeline is dead, just get over it.

Man, some people accused the UWM of treating the timeline like a religion, but this dude actually does...

I know; I applaud his efforts, but he is only going to find the same misery that caused Historian-sama to leave 'this' coil.

I like comedy...this is pure comedy to me. Lol@religion based things!

Originally Posted by DakZhul

I like comedy...this is pure comedy to me. Lol@religion based things!

Good, then I bet you get a real kick out of the Zelda series. HUGE RELIGIOUS REFERENCES in there:

Anybody remember back when the Pope said the Antichrist will come from the Muslims? What does Ganondorf come from? An arabian-like race called the Gerudo.

Notice how fast the Muslim community picked up on that 'one'?

Originally Posted by Sentient

This is ridiculous. The timeline isn't a religion. The linear timeline is dead, just get over it.

Man, some people accused the UWM of treating the timeline like a religion, but this dude actually does...

A religion is your belief. A theory is your belief. What's the difference?

Originally Posted by Super Ganny

A religion is your belief. A theory is your belief. What's the difference?

A theory is a collection of propositions, gathered to illustrate the principles of a subject, in this case a bunch of video games. In other words it's a result of dialectical reasoning based on the evidence that is given to us. Naturally the debaters have certain beliefs, without them there would be no debate.

In your case however, you have chosen to ignore certain pieces of evidence. Ignoring evidence leads to a situation where timeline theorizing ceases to be a process of reason and begins to resemble religion.

Religion is a set of unquestionale beliefs that can not be scientifically proven or scrutinized. As someone here put it, science gives us questions we can not answer, religion gives us answers we can not question. I believe your opinions stated in the opening post go much better with the latter.

Uhm, no. We will not have another thread like this. Threads that only talk about creating, or supporting a mini-club on ZU is not allowed. This forum is for discussing theories about Zelda. Not creating clubs, making rules for said mini-clubs or anything of the sort.