A Diary of Death
'Light thinks it travels faster than anything but it is wrong. No matter how fast light travels it finds the darkness has always got there first, and is waiting for it.'
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A DIARY of DEATH
An account of extraordinary detail regarding the life (or appropriate analogy) of Death,
the Grim Reaper, the Angel of Death, the Fourth Horseman, Yama, Sammael,
He of Many Names and of None, Sammael, and occasionally Oh, ♥♥♥♥.
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Time; a system used to sequence and measure events, to compare the duration of events and the intervals between them, and to quantify changes to the universe. Ever changing, ever flowing, it defines the universe, gives it meaning, for without time the universe would be still and cold, as cold as death. Time is life, and to live is to spend time.
Or so I have been told.
And yet, I am older than time. While you struggle to solve this paradoxical statement, I will use the ample time (if you will pardon the pun) that such a monumentous task affords us to explain to you the purpose of this record of events, though even such a statement will add to the extreme weight of this conundrum as you may or may not come to the question, albeit slowly, that without temporal sequences how can events take place, ergo, how can one record such events?
The answer is, quite simply, because I choose to.
Unfortunately, the complex nature of this noncompliance with what you perceive as 'the laws of physics' – and what I perceive as a formality – does not end with these questions. Rather, what will truly bake your noodle (what a curious analogy that is, don’t you think? I saw it on one of the Matrix films and it has stuck with me for some time*) is that while I exist outside of time's demands, I see all time. I see every future, every past, every present. And furthermore, I exist in all of them simultaneously. I think they call it quantum-something, I forget (by which, of course, I mean that I know perfectly well but will instead choose to feign ignorance in an effort to appease your frazzled mind and senses, and if you decide to question me on this I will give you a stern look and quite possibly a disapproving frown, insofar as I am capable of frowning without eyebrows, or indeed, skin). This essentially means that despite having just made the completely spontaneous decision to write these memoirs, for lack of a better term, I have always known that I would spontaneously decide to write them now and can in fact remember writing them already; while that should logically negate any such spontaneity it is, nonetheless, completely unpremeditated.
I told you. It’s some pretty quantum stuff.
But I digress. I am sitting here - in a rather comfortable chair, might I add - writing these words in an effort to make you, the common mortal, understand (or at the least, to even vaguely begin to grasp at the seams of my existence). I grow weary of this negative reputation that surrounds me†. Yes, I carry a scythe. Sure, I’m a skeleton. Yes, I do indeed wear a robe. But for your information, the scythe is not a weapon of torture or war, but a simple tool in the grand circle of life; it represents the end of a season when the harvest must be reaped so that new life may take the place of the old. And what, pray, is wrong with skeletons? You have one too, you know. And they’re much more efficient and streamlined.
As for the robes…well, black never goes out of fashion.
Yet what amuses and frustrates me the most is that you, the common mortal, have made me this way. Well, admittedly not you specifically, but as a whole. I have been created as a direct result of your beliefs, via the process of anthropomorphic personification. I do not know everything but I do remember everything, and I can remember so many countless aeons before your existence was even a minor jest on the tongue of some insignificant deity, before I even had a name for names did not yet hold significance; I was without this form, I was all-encompassing. I was pure, or as pure a form as can exist without the notion of purity or impurity, for there was nothing but I.
And then you came, climbing in your trees and living in your caves, dancing around your fires and drawing on the walls of your homes. The power of belief is astounding, which is odd given the general insignificance of your kind; you believed in something so thoroughly that it actually altered the form of death itself. Of course, I am no longer the only Death (though I'm certainly the only one you will be properly acquainted with, albeit in due time), but rather one of many. Countless, really. We are one and we are many, for as a whole we form The Death‡, Azrael.
That's quantum for you.
But I have digressed from my original point once again, so I shall draw this entry to a close before my ramblings take me in a wholly new direction. Suffice to say, despite all the quantum surrounding my existence and the potential impact the existence of these paradoxical entries may have on time and space, I don't really care and as far as I'm concerned both Time and Space can bugger off to the pub while I do the hard work, since that's how our relationship usually works. I'll be making these now and then when I have the time°, so for now I won't say goodbye. I'll leave it at...be seeing you.
* This statement will only make things worse. Try not to think about it.
† Well actually, that isn’t completely true; the reputation can be quite rewarding. I get good discounts.
‡ Use of a capitalised "The" here is entirely warranted, I assure you.
° ...Sorry.
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Author's Note
This is something I decided to start working on yesterday. It's supposed to be a little bit of humour, a touch dark (but not too dark), and maybe a little philosophical. I'll hopefully be posting something new once every so often, whenever inspiration strikes me. I'm not entirely sure where I think this will be going, so I'm just going to let it pan out on its own. As for feedback, I'm always happy to receive it - but if it can be avoided I'd like to keep this thread generally clear for ease of reading (for my sake as much as anyone's). So please make full use of the Like button (if you liked reading this?), my VM wall, and PMs because I'd love to know what you thought. And thank you for taking the time to read this! I hope you enjoyed it as much as I did. 
