Einai's Training

It was early in the morning, just before the rays of the glossy red sun. The glow from the coals nearly exhausted, still emitting a small heat from the hearth. As I rose from the uneven straw bed I saw that the drafty cabin was still lit by a candle by my bedside. A gust of wind blew through the empty space, sending an ominous chill down my spine. Seeing the first rays of the day peer through the dirty window I took note of the peculiarly high quantities of dust hanging stagnant in the chilly air.

Pulling on my various clothing I walked to the door and into the next room. The room was larger. It had a high slanted ceiling with the rafters showing and across the lower of two levels were strewn heavy oak tables with chairs roughly arranged around them. On the opposite side was a long sturdy counter where there were many tall stools. A contraption on the wall behind it had levers labeled with the names of beverages. Immediately curious I walk to the machine. Seeing a nozzle under one of the levers, I took a mug from the counter and held it under then pulled the lever marked ‘Red Heart.’

“I hope you plan on paying for that, fellow,” a voice from behind gave me a start.

“Ah! Innkeeper, you startled me. I was only curious of how this machine works. What makes it ‘tick’ if you will?” I replied, “And yes, I will pay for the drink.”

“That will be five coppers,” the man held out his hand. I reluctantly reached into my pocket and pulled out the money. He thanked me and proceeded to tell me of his beverage dispencer, “It is no more complicated then a cork on the force that keeps you and me on the ground. No real mechanisms involved.”

“Thank you. I’ll be on my way now, for I have much ground to cover.”

“Oh? And where are you headed in such a hurry?”

“I must find a man known as Orysius Solian.”

“Him? Oh he is closer then you would think,” We walked over to the window. There was a fog that had drifted over the land and the great river that carved the mountain. I stared until the window was covered completely in dew.

A sudden clamor arose from behind, all the tables filled with food and the chairs around their respective place settings filled with people. Many were joyous and chanted old songs that revealed that they were drunk. The tattered ceiling was now a burgundy color and a grand chandelier would have made the place seem extravagant, if it weren’t for the current inhabitances. The innkeeper had vanished, but beside me stood a beautiful young woman. “Hey, want anything Hun?”

Startled once again, I look around for who she might be talking to. Seeing no one else in this area of the inn I realized she was talking to me. “Sorry nothing for now. By the way, what is this place?”

“This is a place of passing. These men were once promising worriers. But they were too afraid of what lay ahead to go on. Most too ashamed to go back to their homes, know they had failed. So they cursed themselves to this drunken hollow. Fortunately there are always enough rooms to cater them.” The waitress paused for a moment, staring out the window. I noticed she was rather slender and apparently wearing as little clothing as possible without being indecent. She had golden hair that flowed down to the nave of her back. Silver streaks outlined her face. She wore very little blush, but still looked beautiful. “So… I see you’ve got yourself some Red Heart. Doses that mean you will be staying with us? You do seem to be a little less ‘rough around the edges. Cute too!”

She made a move to stroke my chin. Feeling uncomfortable, I moved away quickly. “Maybe you can tell me where I can find Orysius Solian?”

“Him? Oh he is in The Dome. Just go through those double doors.”

Looking around the room, I scanned the room for the double doors and at first found nothing. Then in the corner of my eye I spotted them, just fading into existence. I hurriedly made my way over to the other side of the room. I only paused a moment when a group of the Intoxicated men grasped me around the shoulders, trying to make me sing with them. I brushed them off and opened the doors. Past them I saw nothing, and yet a feeling of everything emerged from the passageway void of light. Taking a breath I took a step, and then another into The Dome. Looking down, I realize the mug was gone. “Hey! I was goanna drink that!”

Welcome to the Intermediate Class. Very good first post! A few things I need to cover before we begin:

First off, while writing in first person is acceptable, you must stick to a tense, and since we are writing fiction, that tense is the past. I can tell by your skill that I do not need to explain tenses for you, but I would very much like it if you stick to using the past tense and do not randomly jump into the present.

Secondly, the Dome is massive, and is linked to many dimensions, but it does not have a full-fledged town within it. Normally, I would not heckle a person for their creative interpretation of the Dome (this was its purpose, after all), but this will be too difficult of an interpretation to work around. The Dome itself is a single, massive building which exists in and is linked to most dimensions in existence. Once you enter the Dome, you are no longer within the dimension from which you came--you are in the Dome.

So, on that note, before I give you your first lesson, I want you to fix those two things for me: Go in and edit the tense errors, and change your ending to include your character finding the Dome itself. Post in here when you have done so.

alright... ready for judgment!

Alright, good. Now inside the Dome, your character will meet a Domerii, a butler of the Dome. Domerii are small, pale-skinned, and humanoid. Have the Domerii explain to your character what the Dome is (an inter-dimensional training facility that picks its own inhabitants), why your character is here, and that your character will be taught by Orysius Solian. Then, have the Domerii lead your character to his (your character's) new room in the Dome.

When they arrive at the room, the Domerii should leave. The Dome knows the type of room each of its inhabitants would desire, and so it fills it with all of the necessary commodities and things that inhabitant would like. So, I want you to see your descriptive skills when your character enters his room. End the post after your character has become comfortable in his new room.

Strangely illuminated in the black passageway a small, pale figure approached from behind the fading door. He appeared to be the age of seven, eight at most. His face was young and round, but his eyes were cold and angular. On his head was a green cap, perfectly conformed to his head. On his body he wore similar t-shirt and shorts. It seemed that the outfit would be cold. But the passage did not seem to have temperature, just as there was no actual light and dark.

“Come. Follow me,” he looked into my eyes. His gaze gave a feeling like my very sole was being compelled to obey. The boy began to walk. I follow, though I don’t quite trust him. “Do you know what this place is?”

“The Dome?” a hesitant answer came.

“Well… at least you know what it’s called,” the boy turned to face me, walking backwards, “The Dome is an inter-dimensional training facility that picks its own inhabitants.”

“I have to admit I have no idea what that means.”

The boy just rolls his eyes. “It means that it is connected to worlds that you could only dream of. Not just a few, but all of them. This place is infinitely spacious as it is small. You could walk the dome over a hundred times and find a new room each time. You see, the dome is a training ground, but not just anyone can get in. The Dome searches for worthy candidates. Here resides Orysius Solian.”

“Alright that explains that, but what then are you?”

“Forgive my rudeness. I am a Domerri. A butler to the dome. Let me show you to your room.”

I followed blindly in this strange darkness. Slowly, nearly unnoticeably, light began to fill the passage. Cobbled stone floors and regale velvet coated the walls. Fading into view, another set of double doors appeared with a torch on either side. However, these doors had no handles. Curious, I reach out at it. The doors swing wide before us before I had the chance to touch them, “Your room Sir.”

The light was blinding. The Domerri gave a shove at me and a fell into the room. The doors quietly shut and disappeared before I had the chance to protest. It took a long while for my eyes to adjust, but when they did, I felt like I was I heaven. It was a large room with modest furnishings. A stream ran right down the middle of it. I watched it for a while and noticed a pair of coy, on black and one white, swam with an eddy. They seemed to balance each other out. Never stopping, seldom slowing, they circled in harmony. The stream seemed to meander and had sloping banks of sand and larger boulders. In one corner there were various machines and technologies that I had never seen before. And in a clearing just past the sturdy oak bridge that spanned the stream was a training dummy similar to the one at the village. This one however, looked to be much faster and stronger then what I could make. In another corner were a bed and a shelf full of books. Along the walls were imprints were doors may be. I tossed my gear in a chair and started to rest my feet in the stream.

Alright, better. You're still jumping your tenses, though. I'll let it slide this once, but from here on in if you change tenses in your posts I will have you go back and edit them.

But at any rate, you're doing a fantastic job. For your text assignment, have your character get hungry. He will exit his room and begin looking for somewhere to eat. Describe the Dome as he wanders around looking for food. Remember, you can describe anything, like the Dome's appearance, the people walking around, anything.

Eventually, have your character find the cafeteria. He will get some food, and then sit down at an empty table. A hooded stranger will sit down with him shortly and begin a conversation with him. This stranger is not Orysius. The content of the conversation is up to you. End the post when it reaches a natural end. I say the word natural because I want you to feel as free as you can with the dialogue. Write as much as you want.