[Ry-San] Zephir's Training

“Thank you,” Zephir said with much pride.

“But why did you go back?” Sileya’s voice was sterner now.

“What do you mean? So what if I turned back!” He retorted

“You were right above the bottom of the mountain and you went back! Were you trying to kill yourself?”

“I destroyed the snow wyrm, just like you asked.”

“No, I asked you to avoid it and only attack if necessary. Was it necessary?”

She had a point. He didn’t need to destroy it. But Zephir had still chosen to. ”I knew I could slay it and I did!”

“Yes, I am proud that you slew it. But did you notice the lack of energy you had left, your shortness of breath?”

Zephir tensed himself and tightened his fists, turning them red.

“You have a large ego.” Sileya said, glaring in frustration and disappointment at him “You need to learn something: YOU ARE NOT AS POWERFULL AS YOU THINK!”

“JUST SHUT UP!” Zephir yelled with rage. The dragon responded with roaring and pounding of his mighty feet. Zephir turned his back to Sileya and tried to contain himself. He took slow breaths, in and out; in and out. He calmed his nerves and relaxed his muscles.

He turned his head to her. It pained him to look at her. “Sileya…” He started, “I-I’m sorry.”

“It is okay. I have dealt with worse tempers.” She walked to her dragon and urged Zephir to follow. “Come on.” Zephir went over there, and Sileya showed him how to get on a dragon and hold on.

On their way back to the Dome, Zephir concerned himself with the recent conversation (which would have been more of an argument). He wished he hadn’t gotten so angry, but he knew that Sileya was wrong about him. Next time he’d deal with it better.

Sileya told Zephir to go to his room, rest, and maybe bathe. In his own room, he found around a corner a pool in which he could bathe.

Zephir took of his coat and shirt, and stepped in. He immediately jumped out upon discovering the icy cold temperature.

How am I going to warm up this pool so I can bathe comfortably?

He thought about using fire, but that would be too hot. He just needed the heat, but not so much that he would burn.

He called up fire again, and kept it at a small size. All that emanated from his hand was heat. He placed his hands before the pool, and concentrated it through the floor. The heat spread from the stone ground to the watery pool. Eventually, steam billowed from it.

Zephir got in slowly and relaxed. When he was young, he and his friends would always use magic to manipulate the state and shape of water. It was times like theses that Zephir was thankful for his powers. To whom? He didn’t know. All Zephir knew was that he was a mage.

Hours passed, hours of just lying there in the soothing waters. It felt great compared to the icy climate of the mountain. Zephir finally decided he had enough, and went to search for Sileya.

Once he was dressed, he left his room with his hair still damp. He turned through the many hallways of the Dome. He could’ve sworn he was going in circles.

Isn’t there a map of this place?

Finally, came to Sileya’s room. He knocked politely, but there was no answer. On the second knock, it opened. Sileya came out and closed the door.

“Zephir,” she began apologetically, “I’m sorry, but I must leave. I just recently received a message from home and I must return. I hope this does not trouble you.”

OoC: I edited this because I thought the oither one was very bad and poorly written. In my opinion, this is better.

First, Aurora is not a mage, and she might take some small offense to being called such, for her own reasons. She is a summoner. I would highly suggest reading her profile thoroughly before moving on with the first lesson in my intermediate class.

I'll agree, move on with lesson 1 when you're ready.

'ello, Wolfen! I'll be your tutor for the time being. As you have heard two teachers have resigned from their teaching jobs and so Ry-san is going to need a lot of help with the extra students. I'm one of her TAs and so I have the honor of tutoring you. The character I will be using is Leita, she's a mage too so she'll go well with your character. I advise that you read up on her profile which is in my sig, and get started on lesson 1.

OoC: Cool! I have a tutor, lol. So, how will Zephir and your character meet? And what will she do that Aurora won't?

BiC:


Zephir was stunned. He stood there, mouth slightly agape, and confusion circling in his eyes. He had not expected this. “But, you said you would train me. Who will if you won’t?”

“I have already had it taken care of for all of my students. A fellow teacher, Aurora, has agreed to take all of my students.”

Zephir kicked the wall and swore.

“Calm down,” Sileya ordered. “I know I’ve only been your teacher for a short time, but I must go.”

“I know,” He replied, “I just wanted to train with you. You seem very skilled in magic, and that’s the kind of teacher I wanted: a mage.” He kicked the wall again and sighed.

“Well, if it makes you feel any better, Aurora is a skilled fighter as well. She also knows a little about magic. Chi energy, I think it is called.”

She may not be a mage, but at least I’ll have a teacher.

“Your first lesson will be to find a room. The door to it will say: Aurora-First Assignment. It may be hard to find, but it will be recognizable. Once inside the room, Aurora will be waiting."

Looks like I won’t be meeting my teacher until I find this room.

“Oh, and I think I may have something you’ll like. That is… Are you skilled with a bow-staff?”

“Yes. Why?”

“I have one, and I hear they can help with magic. Plus, you seem to have lost your sword.” She pointed at his empty sheath hanging from his side and chuckled. “Let me get it for you.” She quickly disappeared into her room. After s few bangs and clonks, she came out holding a new weapon for Zephir.

It was a solid black bow-staff, almost five and half feet in length. There were four rings on the staff, all a little more than one foot apart. Zephir caught it in his hands as Sileya tossed it to him. Hmmm… Light and durable… Perfect!

“Thank you,” He said to her, bowing. “I’ll remember you when I hold and use it.”

“I am honored.” She turned away, saying goodbye. Zephir gently waved back, and turned. “Oh, and we WILL meet again. I promise.” She smiled and walked away.

Zephir took one last look at the broadsword on her back as she disappeared down the hallway. He turned around and went through a door that led him outside.

He stood in an outdoor hallway similar to the one he came through when he first entered the Dome. He slowly stepped closer to the landscape, looking out across it, his eyes filling with awe and wonder. It was unreal. The landscape was so richly colored yet sort of bland. It reached out further than any eye could gaze and yet could be touched. It seemed so life-like yet so much like a painting. It was… inexpressible.

This place… is so… magnificent. His eyes turned back to the building, the roofs, and other towers. And so big. It will take forever to find that room

Zephir walked down the out-door hallway, his eyes fixated on the landscape.

He came to a crossroad: two hallways and one pair of stairs. He stood in the middle. The floor was marble with a circular design on it. He looked down each path, reaching indecision.

Ack! How am I supposed to know where to find the door?

The floor decided to jerk itself beneath him. His face smacked the hard ground. He turned over to see steps in front of him, leading up to a large door.

Zephir stood, eyes widened by the quickness of it all. He was now in a room with yellow walls and no doors, except for the one on the steps. The floor was made of ruby, bright red under the light. A container that looked like a shelf with an outer border went across the wall. Etched on the border was some strange, green design. In the bordered shelf were flames to give the room light.

The Dome… changed? he thought, confused. He slowly walked to the door and touched it. Emblazoned on it was, “Aurora – First Lesson”.

He grabbed the handle, the only normal looking item in the room, and opened the door.

As Zephir closed the door, he turned around and it disappeared. Snow again!

He walked forward, the snow crunching loudly beneath his feet. The snow then became softer and deeper. He came to a few small cliffs. He jumped down and saw, no more than a few yards away, a black gate.

Hm ... ok, a few punctuation errors.

“Calm down.” Sileya ordered.

Okay, when you have someone speaking like that it should be:

"Calm down," Sileya ordered.

See the comma after "down"? Whenever you have someone saying something with a "said" or "ordered," something that indicates that they are speaking, you put a comma after the last word that they speak. You made that mistake again, so I wasn't sure if you knew that. Also:

It was a solid black bow-staff, almost 5 and half feet in length. There were four rings on the staff, all a little more then 1 foot apart.

when saying small numbers like five or one, you should spell them out instead of doing 5 or 1. But if it is a larger and more complicated number, you can use: 2,453, for example.

I suggest you look through your post again, look for punctuation and grammar errors. Your spelling was fine, but double check just in case I or you missed something. After you do that and I find it is good, you may carry on to lesson two.

Oh and don't worry. Leita basically fills in Aurora's place in the lesson plan, so just think of it that way.

I edited it and added the "Lesson One" at the beginning of the lesson.

So instead of meeting Aurora at the gate, he'll meet Leita?

Read lesson two and you will find that Zephir won't meet his teacher yet. And don't worry about introductions, you just have worry about what's in lesson two. (Meaning you're ready for the next lesson, carry on.)