Poems by Cukeman

Title: Ganondorf has launched his plan

Ganondorf has launched his plan
Link's the hero (who da man?)
Impa and Zelda make their escape
Ganon chases -wind in his cape
Impa! Zelda! go!go!go!

Ganondorf: duh...
which way did they go?
which way did they go?

Inspiration: Ocarina of Time

Title: Are the fins damp lately?

We live in peace in waters calm
eating fish and hearts of palm
we keep the waters sparkling clean
the landscape stays a lovely scene
-Are the fins damp lately?

We protect it for his highness' sake
an oath of loyalty we both did take
winter, spring, summer, fall
waters gush from heights so tall
flowing from our serene town
as lovely as a fairy's gown
-Are the fins damp lately?

We keep the water crystal clear
so fish can see from there to here
our water is so very pure
it soothes our hearts just like a cure
-Are the fins damp lately?

In Termina our brothers dear
put on an act that's a must-hear
Thier Indigo a-go-go band
rocks the very grains of sand
because they are such famous stars
to visit them we'd journey far
-Are the fins damp lately?

Inspiration: Ocarina of Time & Majora's Mask

Title: (overheard from a window in Hyrule Castle Market)

I'm a fat bald guy
and I own a store
I gotta lotta prizes
that you gotta adore

Make my money offa little pests
who open up mah treasure chests
yeah!

every thing was goin' cool
countin' up mah money (drool)
alla sudden HE comes in
ah didn' think that he would win
little shrimp comes inna door
didn' know what I was in for
Yo!

he took out a li'l ol' looking glass
won the game and took mah cash!

He musta been cheatin'
cuz the time before
he held a piece a'heart
as he went out da door!
Ooh!

it's like he saw right through mah chests
he had a magic item
(dat's mah guess)

so neva eva eva
will I no more
let GREEN kids
walk in da door
Yeah!

Boom-chucka-boom-ba-dum-da-boom!

Inspiration: Ocarina of Time

Title: Gan-anne, the bad man

There once was a bad man
named Gan-anne
who told us a ton
"My name's Ganon!"
and that's why Gan-anne
became a bad man;
and let his nose to grow long

Upset by his name
he took hold of fame
by tossing the king out the door
-he killed rich and poor
and turned farm to moor;
and then let his nose to grow long

In his head was a jewel
-(though he was a fool)
and the Triforce of Wisdom soon left him
just to check on a whim
he looked behind him;
and saw Courage go out the door

This made Ganon sad,
-so Ganon grew mad
and swore they were his to be had
so he captured the girl
('cause he was a churl);
and waited, his nose growing long

and before very long
HE came with a song
-(the hero who was to defeat him)
his name was Link
and he looked like a fink;
said Ganon as soon as he saw him

Link said "You stink!"
and he gave him the wink
and deftly began to attack
Ganon (taken aback)
the floor did soon smack;
and Link said "Man his nose long!"

Link then rescued Zelda
(from where Ganon helda')
and began to feel serene
but Ganon was mean
and (true to his scheme);
it was soon LINK'S turn to retreat

On his feet he did beat
a hasty retreat
as the castle came crashing around him
although he was dashing
he soon heard swords clashing;
as Stalfos soon came to surround him

Zelda was worried
but that Link!(he hurried)
and they flew out the gate in a flurry
Ganon's plan was big
so he turned to a pig;
and even STILL was his nose long!

Link said with a frown
"Man! You're goin' DOWN!"
(while Zelda looked on in a gown)
THE sword did Link wield
and from the realm(sealed)
screamed out "I WILL HEAL!";
(and return with my long nose to haunt you!)

Link said, "Says you?
From me to you POOH!"
and away with Zelda he flew

Link was proved wrong
'cause Ganon was strong;
...but that OTHER story is long...

Inspiration: Ocarina of Time & Wind Waker

Title: The Pawn Shoppe

Link went to the pawn shop
to hock a blue octorok
but accept the beast
they would not

Inspiration: The Legend of Zelda

Title: The Shadow of Fear

I walk through the valley-
Of the shadow of fear
And...
As I go...
...I sense evil near

A hand on my shoulder,
I turn
-It's not there...

A ghost
-of a ghost,
Appears in thin air

But through all of my fright,
In the mind of my eye,
I know there is something,
Someone...
Deep inside

Ages of old
-stories spirits tell
Drowned screams of kings,
Echo in the well...
...through the water's shell...

Garbled and sealed,
As though by a spell...

...and through the water's mirror-
Trapped inside thin glass...
An invisible wall,
Through which time does not pass...

A terrible hist'ry,
Of hatred and greed...
A warning to fools,
That they might take heed...

Kingdoms are lost-
And riches soon vanish-
But from our poor earth-
Troubles never vanish...

Whispered near my ear...
These voices I hear...

...and laughter abhorrent,
Vile and clear,
How it rings in my ear...
(There is nothing to fear...)
(There is nothing to fear...)

I walk through the valley-
Of the shadow of fear
And...
As I go...
...I sense evil near

A well -untouched
For hundreds of year...
A graveyard beneath...
Yes, I travel here

Rusty shackles long crumbled,
Oaken beams long brittled,
Yet fresh spots of blood...
Yes, they linger here

It beckons I fear-
That torture was here

'though ages long passed,
My eyes fast I cast
'round every corner-
'neath every shadow...

For I know through my fear,
That evil's still here...

Spikes pounding,
-and chains
And mortal remains...

I gaze in a pool,
And see brave growing reeds
In the swirling green waters...
...within which they breed...
The water glows as it swirls...
And bubbles, and curls...

One breath did I draw,
As I drew closer I saw
That these were no reeds,
-near the dry banks of sand...
No-
These were the bones...
Of-of many MEN'S HANDS!

Quickly I flee
From this gruesome scene

Eyes long searching for,
-for something serene
For anything pleasant...
Or peaceful...serene...

Walls of mortar and stone,
With mold do they grow...
Slimy above,
And...
Murky below

Wrought-iron gates-
Tied to ancient men's fates
And the cries of lost souls,
Silently...
Hang in the air...

(There is nothing to fear...)
(There is nothing to fear...)

Statues of death-
That mine eyes cannot see...
Rich men who died,
-without a rupee...

Coffins and tombs...
Filling rooms upon rooms...
Dead men's whispers,
-and groans
Regretful murmurs,
-and moans...

Their longing I hear...
'though they are now only bones

I walk through the valley-
Of the shadow of fear
And...
As I go...
...I sense evil near

Deep...
Deep in darkness I pass,
Long, long ago...
Through light's door I passed...

I am lost in the bog-
In death's deep black fog-
Midnight without end-
Ink without pen-
Shadows cast from the darkness,
Which are blacker than black
And feed upon all,
The courage I lack-
Engorging upon,
The faith we all lack...

Darker and deeper,
-and deeper and darker...

I can feel my heart pounding-
And the darkness surrounding...
Consuming all light...
-enveloped in fright

...but the darkness within...
Beats the darkness without
Towards the center I draw
To face my OWN doubts

'though I should be retreating
I hear ITS heart beating...
The thing I must face...
And confront...
face to face...

Which be the worse...
The master of this place?
Or my own fear that I face?

Inspiration: Ocarina of Time

Title: Do the Ganondorf!

Do the Ganondorf!
Swing your sword
from side to side
Knocking heads off
of the enemies
C'mon everybody!
Let's go-do the Ganondorf!

Take one Triforce,
and then another
gotta get 'em all
C'mon-do the Ganondorf!

Inspiration: Do the Mario!

Title: I live down below, down below

Oh, I live down below, down below
for how many years, no one knows
I see nary a soul,
nor person I know,
for I live down below, down below

Oh, I live down below, down below
for how many years, no one knows
I count the hours,
twelve chimes of the clock,
hear them tick,
hear them talk.
but for years I go,
with seldom a soul,
beside me with whom I could tock.

Oh, I live down below, down below
for how many years, no one knows
my skin hath grown pale,
like the color of ale,
I have not seen the sun for so long,
my arm it is long,
and to be here is wrong
but I live down below, down below

From the keeper I hide,
I offend not her pride,
by revealing myself too often,
but I must up for air,
because it's only fair,
this place is stuffy as a coffin

Oh, I live down below, down below
for how many years, no one knows

It has long been my creed,
that I like to read,
and often I search for more paper,
but more paper I need
for another deed,
which is truly a secret caper

Oh, I live down below, down below
for how many years, no one knows

When I come out at night,
the hostess I fright,
and a scolding is sure to be mine
but she pities my whine,
"I must come out time to time"
and we shake
and the deal is sold

Oh, I live down below, down below
for how many years, no one knows

Inspiration: Majora's Mask

Title: I am mopping the slop...

I am mopping the slop,
'til it's done I won't stop.
I must polish the joint,
so the elite make a stop.
Yes- that is the point,
Why I'm mopping the slop...

At day it is dark-
it is dusty and dank,
At day it is stark and-
last night's big mess...
I have myself to thank.

In the evening I slumber
I must rest for tonight,
I'll be pouring tumblers-
Reflecting fragments of light.

Oh, at night it's a palace!
Of neon and pink,
And purple and silver,
-it's pretty I think.

The lights brightly sparkle,
On white walls of marble
-the music is light,
And plays cheerful all night

I fill and I fill
With tall glasses chill,
The white light of joy-
in the dark solemn night.

Overflowing the brim-
Some for her, some for him.
The milk of Great Mother Earth,
Ten or twelve rupee's worth.

The hum of conversation,
The tinkling of glasses,
The word for the day,
The mingling of classes

It's a magical haven,
From the burden of life,
A well for the soul,
Which eases our strife

Boisterously they yell,
They have forgot for a spell,
The hard work of day,
And a story they tell.

The day was a fight,
But they lived to the night.
They conquered the day,
And are all men of might.

Women laughing with cheer-
Came with their men here.
They accompany them
Of whom they are fond,
Making merry and light
As they joke 'til the dawn.

They leave full of good cheer
Jolly and jovial,
-clambering out,
As they let slam the door
And in the street shout,
and I glance at the floor-
and wonder in doubt...

To make their hearts glow-
Yes, that is my joy,
And to see thier soul smile-
As if given a toy.

But there is a price,
For my joy-in their's.
And I pay to the full,
scrubbing floors,
wiping chairs...

They go home tired to bed,
and I feel as one dead,
and I feel my back ache,
for I'm still awake-

My burden of joy,
to work 'round the clock
to always make sure-
paradise never stops.

And so I'm mopping the slop,
'til it's done I won't stop.

Inspiration: Majora's Mask

Title: It was snowy

It was snowy as hell
As I knew all too well,
On that cold fateful day,
When I fell down the well

The well of the chimn'y,
-For the iced roof was slipp'ry
And I, not too nimbly
Came to land on my butt

I was up one story high,
From whence I fell on my
Ash dirtied my suit,
As I landed in soot

She saw me and said
"Do you know how I've scrubbed
that floor so pristine
that you have now rubbed
with your feet not-so-clean?

"For my work you will pay,
Ha! Yes, I dare say!
You wilt shovel my walk-
If it takes the whole day!"

Boy, what an attitude!
So I shoveled her walk,
-I was hurt by her talk
She said "Keep the shovel",
As I left her hovel,
Pssh!
How's that for gratitude?

Inspiration: Oracle of Seasons

Title: foul Zelda board

I was up late
I was not at Hyrule's gate
I shoulda been in bed
but Zelda was in my head
I read and re-read posts
and counted up the most

oh foul Zelda board
my time thou surely hoards
I should be doing homework
but you have pulled out my quirk

and now I am doomed

doomed as the moon

I mean the village the moon descends on
that falls all of the night
and then at dawn it lands on

ah but I digress
my eyes are getting stressed
white light
as bright as the evil realm
I'm on the ship of time
with no one at the helm
oh why can't I get to sleep
If only TP Link herded sheep
but NO! he herds dem goats
it really gets my...goat
my head I should go soak
if only for a joke

oh if only TP were here
I would rather spend my time
exploring all of Hyrule
an experience sublime
but it takes as long to trek
through the posts on this board
my minutes soon are stolen
as though by Ganon's horde
Link goes on bold adventures
which I seem to play from armchairs
ah to up and get around
but energy's no where to be found
oh curse this forum awful
against thee a curse I sound
but I really do not hate thee
and that ain't so profound...

Inspiration: late nights on Zelda forums

Title: ...?

Sleeping forest haze,
Lost in dreams of former days,
Mesmerizing maze...

Fog of visions curl,
A swimming mind reels and whirls,
In the Nether-World...

Wakened by a thud.
Lying sprawled in grass and mud-
Pain courses like blood

Grabbed at by the scruff
Dragged. Pounded. In manner rough
Who can bruise the tough?

Awake? -Not at all?
Through the voids of darkness fall
What is floor and wall?

Landing flash of pain
White light floods, and sears the brain.
Accustom eyes again.

Ghostly figure stands
Life's hope twirls within his hands
Ages of the sands

He is there-and gone.
Amidst tangled branchy throng
What has gone so wrong?

Roots above...not below
Night is day - dark to and fro.
Into darkness go

To black, past does fade
Faintest hues of color shade,
Of hope they are made

Dream-life pivots. whirls.
From which reality swirls
Wake or dreaming world?

Climb, a case of stair.
Music echoes, from nowhere
It is here, but where?

Door of exit found
Beyond lie beckoning sounds
Dreams at last unwound?

Enter into light
Small sun - blue sky - end of night
What lies within sight?

Normal seeming town.
Not a sign or shock or frown
What is going down?

Am I here or there?
Am I really anywhere?
I am in life's tear

As I wonder how,
Journeying- I realize
I'm trapped here for now...

Inspiration: Majora's Mask

Title: And as the waves wash over me

Corruption has returned
To the secret place of yore
Affliction of the past
Stings again

Withdrawn from all of life,
to the home of no-man's land
Safe from the grasping reach-
of evil's wicked hand

and yet, here I am...

Beauty of the past
Land of greatness-
Land of honor-
Land of prosperity...

Still shelters the abode
of vile hostility...

The knothole in the wood,
The burnt crust of the bread
The wood chip in the treasury,
The serpent in the sea

The power of great good:
-the door to evil's key
The blessing to the world-
that followed evil's plea

A home to support all
Led to the jealous fall...
Envious thing of malice
corrupts the people's palace...

-Yet people thrive and grow,
even but/although
hideous power lurks-
and in a dark pit grows...

Threatening their life
and despite/all the same
People thrive and grow
and fail

The good fall before the wrath,
Befalling dreadful fate
For those who would be good-
Thus stand in evil's path
Run over by the herd

This I cannot be
Allow this pain to pass
And even as time flows
It's still too much to ask

Good ever victorious;
Evil's everlast
Returns to thwart the glorious-
to ruin all the past-
'Till good triumphs again

Drought beset by rain,
Rivers flood again,
Harvest, winter, famine,
Starving, hungry, full

Life thus stems a tide,
Life thus ebbs and pulls,
And people's wills are pulled...

At the end of every day,
when soft light goes away,
The moon rises up,
Glaring cold in it's brutal way
And at it- my soul does bay...

And waits ages for the day...

At last that day has come,
and night looms red once more-
And fills me full of dread-
as I crumble to the floor...

I have lost the war of time,
The battles that were mine-
...were never in my hands...

And the people I fought to save-
Their good life to uphold...

I could not...



I could not...


And as the waves wash over me,
It shall ever be no more...

Inspiration: Wind Waker

Title: Feel that Goron beat

Feel that Goron beat
underground
livin' it pretty
deep in the city

Feel that Goron beat
tatooed dudes
fists pounding
ground sounding

Feel that Goron beat
rocks you know we
like to eat and
soak our toes
in lava's heat

Feel that Goron beat
rock rollin '
don't be strollin'
when we're all
goin'

Feel that Goron beat
bombs blast
sounds fantast-
ic to hear
grin comes
from ear to ear

Feel that Goron beat
big bro Daruni-
no- he's no puny
he's got the dance
his feet feel the beat

Feel that Goron beat
'out the town
our sound be found
no you can't drown
echoes deep
to forest's keep

Feel that Goron beat
Hyrule King's
our brother hear?
he's a one ya
need to fear
like our boss
he's the man
with him we pledge
no broke we can

Feel that Goron beat
come to town
you be our guest
dish up sirloin
per your request
join us for
a bombing game
mix it up
keep it all the same
and
Feel that Goron beat

Inspiration: Ocarina of Time

Title: Link:(:smileysad:)

There ya go ma'am!
I rounded up your cuccos,
put 'em back in the pen,
an shut the door slam!

"Oh, thank you boy!"
Link:(:smileysad:)

Here you are sir!
Straight back from town
got the mask you were wanting
and I'm back in a blur!

"You really are Mr. Hero!"
Link:(:smileysad:)

Just for you Goron!
Took the frog to the lab
got the goods for your eyes,
so go ahead pour on!

"Ahhhh! That feels grrrrrreeat!"
Link:(:smileysad:)

I got the Spiritual Stone!
That green shining gem,
to prevent that Ganon
from usurping the throne!

"Thank you Link!"
Link:(:smileysad:)

I believe this is yours?
This fine metal saw?
This saw that I found
that was left in the fores'

"What? I thought I left that with my old lady!"
Link:(:smileysad:)

I rescued the Sages!
I beat all the monsters!
I cleared out the temples!
I killed the pig-monster!

"Now, you must go back in time."
Link:(:smileysad:)

So let us always remember
the importance of items

Let us not forget
the hero who gets
the items for us

For it's always a fuss
and he gets his hair mussed
just to save us a trip

For he is quick as a whip
and it's him we all use

For a go-fer

But I must reward him
for pleasing my whim
for to do otherwise

Is to admit/realize
that I am myself

Just a loafer

Inspiration: Ocarina of Time

Title: The Dark Lord

Clash of thunder
Clash of steel

Fury in fire
Wrath of hell

Alone for ages
Untapped vien

Power knows
No bounds or chains

A lone descendant
A kingdom lost

A tormented soul
A wanderer lost

Reject of fate
Blood line revoked

Cast out amidst
The other folks

First was betrayed
Before reprisal

Twice betrayed
Once the enemy?

And when outcast
Outcast again

Was it his fault?
And his chagrin?

Alone alone
A partner found

To turn his grief
Clean clear around

To the broken spine
A surge of power

To the gift of pain
In love's needed hour

To poison the sick
To fool the mind

To brace the bone
To never heal

To open the wound
Weakness reveal

Exploited from within
Was confidence gained

And honor lost
Was kingdom gained

If right for one
Was right for all

Then come the cause
The fall for all

And when 'twas clear
That evil's gain

Had caused the loss
Of righteous' name

Of sad man lost
Alone and sole

No longer led
His fate to fill

Fate signed in blood
Code of Honor that be

In truth blackmail
Signed in loyalty

And who be there
That was to help
With all hope gone
No hand to lend
No way to save

When all one did
Was merely fail

The strings are broken
The puppet dead
Evil has won
Good killed the dead

And afterwards
No joy be found
For virtuous loss
Of life profound

With good-dishonest
And evil's pain
Is told the truth
After the pain

After defeat
When it's too late

And both befell
An evil fate

The Dark Lord
has returned

Inspiration: Twilight Princess

P.S. to MODs - I accidentally posted this thread in Fan Fiction, so please
delete that one...not this one.

Uhhh....


interesting to say the least...