My poems

Malon's death (Links poem)

the girl i had loved since the day i met her ... she's dead
the girl who called me fairy boy when i was a boy ... she's dead
the girl who gave me Epona and let me have some fun ... she's dead
the girl who was my one true love forever i shall remember ... she's dead


that poem sucked i should try harder

I liked that poem! Its definately an original take for a Zelda poem. The end line is really good, like he can't think of Malon without also remembering she is dead. But I think that this thread belongs in the miscellaneous section, also you need to capitalize.

WOW! I love how you put "she's dead" at the end of every line so it seems like it's rhyming!

Seriously, it's okay, but it's lacking rythym and creativity. I guess it's free verse and thats okay. It has a good idea just get creative with it.

That was pretty good! Keep practicing and you'll get better! I love how "she's dead" is at the end of each line as well. Poems don't have to rhyme, but I think that you should try using rhymes. (Just a suggestion...) I LOVED that last line! Try to capitalize like.. lutian_atter said. Other than that, yay for you!!!

sorry about that i should try to think more

sorry about that i should try to think more

Hey, like I said, it was a good poem, in my opinion! Those errors are very minor, just a cursory glance for mistakes will take care of everything. You should post more soon!

thanx and i've got better

Um, cool, so then are you going to post them?

Commanders poem:

my life on Ark was great and wonderful till i saw that thing.
that black alien working with robotnik and creating a black hedgehog called "Shadow" the ultimate life form.
my eyes were shocked and then that day came when the GUN forces arrived. They destroyed my family and my friend
"maria" i blame this all on that hedgehog and i will
destroy it