Poems I wrote (Wow! I made a really pitiful title)

I'm really bored so I figured, what the hey, I'll post one of my poems. That's me, blindingly decisive, so here goes.

Individuality

I'm told "be your own person",
I'm still told what to do!
People are conformists, but,
They want uniqueness too.

So, I don't get their thinking.
I'm sure it's not just me.
To be a mindless drone-slave,
Must cost a hefty fee.

But really, what do I know?
I'm just a stupid kid.
I think those people's mouth's should have,
A soundproof, airless lid.

They don't want you to stand out!
You're just there to obey.
Agree with their opinions,
And everything they say.

Submission is a given,
Intelligence is choice,
But I'm an individual,
And I still have a voice.


what do you think (I was having a depressing day)

This is pretty good, you didn't need to say you had a depressing day though because I kind of figured that while reading your poem.

That's a cool poem! I love the last verse. Great job! Can't wait to read more of your stuff!

Nice job me man keep up the good work lookin foward to see more of your work!

It makes sense! I envy you.

Thanks for all the postings (sniff) I was so inspired by the nice things that you all wrote that I was compelled to write another (semi-depressing) poem

SCHOOL

Our thoughts are mixed and jumbled,
We trudge in line with dread.
A flicker of blind panic, drifts
Inside each person's head.

We file in undecided,
Is this hell or even worse?
We must have crossed the dark side,
To awaken such a curse.

Ripping at our eardrums,
The bell rings through the halls.
The thought being present,
makes all the children bawl.

The room is nearing airless.
The whiteboard is too bright.
The windows are locked shut,
For breath, we all must fight.

The voice goes on and on,
I think I've lost my brain,
And just to make my day more fun,
Outside, it starts to rain.

Recess is inside today!
Awakening we groan.
The screaming is so brutal,
An endless searing tone.

Kickballs fly like missiles,
That one just missed my hair!
We can't all last much longer!
Help! It isn't fair!

Pop Quiz today! The teacher cries,
Their face twisted with glee.
Screams echo through the prison/school.
It's murder, don't you see?

Of course, no one deprives us,
Of the ever-joyful gym.
"Swimsuits out today, you brats!"
"I hope you all can swim."

Bruised, broken, and exhausted,
I collaspe into my bed.
I close my eyes and sigh,
Give peaceful rest to the living dead.


I hated elementary school, anyway, I got the very last line from OoT!!!

THAT is sooo ture great job. Hope to see more of your work soon.

Great job, I like how it all flows well together.
And your poem is true, school sucks!

Well keep up the good work, whooot!

Hey, that really captured what school is like for the kids that are in it. I like the imagery. My favorite line is "Screams echo through the prison/school" and my favorite verse is the one that starts with "The room is nearing airless." and ends with "For breath, we must fight"
very good effort

Herm. My useless memory strikes again! Yeah, I know this thread is like, 2 months old, but I don't want to make a new one, and I just remembered it was here. I hope it's alright if I post another poem though (I have lots), but if not, then I am very sorry and I have shamed my position of Obsidian Knight. It happens. So without further ado and throwing caution to the winds, I give you......

Uhhhhh.....I actually can't think of a title.....feel free to suggest and/or criticize.....Heh.

Its eyes reflected endless love,
Ancient, but not old.
It danced with tripping footsteps,
Erasing all the cold.

The earth sprung from Its fingers,
With grace It wove the skies,
And from Its heart, came life reborn.
Sadly Its demise.

It watched with wonder up above,
As plants burst from the ground.
As creatures crawled into the light.
The earth was filled with sound.

It watched as new beings slowly grew,
Surviving off the earth.
They thanked and loved their giving home.
They truly saw its worth.

And then It frowned with worry,
As a creature disappeared,
By the hand of one just like it.
The killer grinned and leered.

With horror It thought to Itself,
What beings did I create?
The love of them was soon suppressed.
Weighed down by rage and hate.

The wonders did not die and fade,
But were covered up instead.
The fields of grass and flowers,
Were drowned with dripping red.

In shaking grasps, a creature held,
A weapon meant to kill.
It wept for everyone of them,
This was not Its will.

It tried to help and stop the pain,
But they drove on with greed.
The skies leaked crystal teardrops,
They said the didn't need.

Its heart grew cold and stony,
As the beings taught new old.
Steel buildings clawed up at the skies;
Earth, reverting back to cold.

It drew away from all of them,
They would never listen now.
It needed to help them soon,
The only question; How?

It closed Its eyes and opened them,
Shattering Its soul,
Inside each being It placed Itself;
But very few would know.

So when you feel that greed and hate,
Will never go away.
Know It's there inside of you.
Tomorrow's a new day.

Confusing, yes? Just a variation of "creation" and how humans, or "the beings" screwed up bad. "It" capitalized, just means some sort of creator, I personally believe there is something that made us, I'm just not sure what.

It's a very cool poem. The rhymes are really good and it flows very nicely. I dont think an explanation is needed, each piece of the story gathers and slopes from one concept to the next seamlessly.

The earth sprung from Its fingers,
With grace It wove the skies,
And from Its heart, came life reborn.
Sadly Its demise.

That was excellent! I really like how you described it as having grace. But the last line I had trouble with, did 'It' die?

But anyway, your poem was good!

Cool poem! i like it you could make a career out of it!

mikestroe ^_^

You have quite an interesting collection of poetry here! I enjoyed the simplicity of your rhymes, and the subjects you wrote about. 'Individuality' caught my attention right away; I loved the final verse, and 'School' was very interesting too. I also enjoyed your latest poem: once again the rhymes are simple and roll mellifluously through the mind, and the concept was great too. Great job!

- Selah

I'm glad you all liked my poem(s). Heh, Simple rymes are my speciality, I'm trying real hard to expand my vocabulary, but its going painfully slow because of my erm, memory problem. But oh well, writing is just fun for me, but I have to keep it simple and sometimes sarcastic, otherwise I confuse myself. lutian_attor: "It" did sort of die in a way, but It also preserved Itself inside each one of us...or something like that... I only have a vauge concept. *ponders*

Righto, Here's another one.

Living is Your Choice

An empty, silent void.
Worse then burning pain.
Not really even there,
Just nothing left to gain.

What have you become?
A vacant broken shell.
All your senses; numb.
Existing can't compel.

Cut off from the world,
Hollow. Drifting. Torn.
The life you didn't live,
You cannot hope to mourn.

Suspended in the cold;
A puppet on a string.
But, no one's guiding you.
This state is what you bring.

Your soul can't comprehend,
This icy frozen world.
What once was pulsing life,
Is crumpled, warped, and furled.

Your eyes are dull and dim,
Living: out of reach.
You face is glacial smooth.
Your wall, love, cannot breach.

I've always thought that Hell,
Is when you are alone.
Locked inside your mind.
Where trapped ones, scream and moan.

Forever lost to me,
Forever lost to you.
You've thrown it all away.
It seems, there's nothing you can do.

But always, hope remains.
You're blinded by your mind.
Let your spirit help you through,
See what you've left behind.

You're isolated there.
Let love give you strength.
Forever's just a word;
Endless in its length.

Loving conquers all.
You are your own worst fear.
Master of your fate,
Keep your choices near.

Choose to live your life.
Wake up from the trance.
Your time is much too short.
You only have one chance.

I never experienced depression myself, but that's how I think it would feel.

Oh, my inspiration? Oddly enough, I wrote this after watching Van Helsing. Why can't I just watch a movie without searching for a deeper meaning?