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Old 12-11-2006, 08:54 PM
spruce58052 United_States spruce58052 is offline
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The Dream of Hope *a true story* (Fan/Con)

The Dream of Hope

Today was the day the boy was going to be baptized. It was all that he ever wanted. To be like the other people, the ones who were always happy and singing and so perfect. And they were happy for him. They were celebrating that today was the day; the day the boy would die and be born again, to share in the grace of the lord with them. And so they sang praises, and everyone was joyous.
The baptism would take place in the river. The river was deep and wide, and flowed off the island into the sea almost like a waterfall. The island itself was shaped like a cone, a spire from the beach to the very top, the whole of which was covered in trees so thick that no one could even see the top, or even where the river ran from.
The boy couldn’t stop himself from hopping with anticipation. It was time! It was time! He was finally going to be baptized! The entire group got up to go, just as excited. Half running, half dancing, all singing, they moved along the beach, to where the river met the ocean. The boy received a pat on the back from one person, a high five from another and several hugs. Then suddenly he yelled. The river was just up ahead! Just around the bend! It was time! Even faster than before, the group surged forward to the point where one could see the river, and stopped. The river was dry.
There was a sudden hush. Not a person moved. The river was dry? How could that be? Are we in the right place? Apparently they were, for they could all see the deep hollow that was the dry bed. The boy’s face fell. Not another person would dare to look at him. All excitement and joy was suddenly gone. Sadness enveloped all who were present.
Finally the group turned to the boy to comfort him. They themselves had little comfort, but they gave him all they had. Its okay, we like you anyway. The words rang pitifully in the boy’s ears. Baptism is not that important. The speaker was quickly reprimanded for saying such. We could follow the riverbed and find out what happened. The boy perked up his ears at this. Was it possible?
His friends grabbed at this hope and held it. There is no way of knowing, but we can try. Yeah, we’ll all go with you! They started the singing up again and began walking the rest of the way to the riverbed. The tension was gone, but the situation still looked bleak to all.
As soon as they reached the riverbed, they began climbing. The island was so steep that you had to hold on to the dense trees to keep one’s balance. The higher they climbed, the steeper it got, and the smaller the riverbed was. It was big when they started, but a time after they started, it had noticeably shrunk.
They kept on climbing. As they proceeded, they found that they were no longer even touching ground, but instead climbing from limb to limb in the trees. The ground itself was coming closed to being parallel to them. The riverbed was the size of a creek, then a stream, and then... it was gone.
They had climbed to the top of the island. It ended in a tiny point, surrounded still by trees. The riverbed could be traced all the way to that point, ending the size of a thread. Everybody sat on trees to rest. Nobody spoke. How could this happen? Today was supposed to be the best day of the boy’s life. Yet instead it was the worst, mostly because he had been so disappointed.
The group circled together to discuss, a little way away from the boy. He could hear the whispers. The talking grew in volume and momentum for a minute, then fell again. He knew what they were talking about. He bet he could have guessed every word. It all made him miserable.
Then something caught his eye. A branch grew upwards from the limb he was sitting on. About eye level, a little light was shining. It was the most beautiful shade of gold. Or was it silver? There was no describing it. He edged closer, and saw that the light was coming through a small hole in the branch. Hesitantly, he peeked through.
How amazing! He would never feel so at peace again. He pulled his head back, and leaned against another branch. He understood his entire problem now. The solution was so simple. In fact, it was there all along. He sighed.
The group approached him altogether. The boy was surprised. He had forgotten all about them. One person stepped up to speak, but stopped short when he saw the smile on the boy’s face. Everyone stared. They had thought that he would be depressed at this point. There was silence.
The boy spoke. He explained about how he had noticed the light in the hole in the branch. He saw the group peering around him, looking for it. The boy went on. He knew it was not there any longer. He told how he had looked in, and saw... with a sudden realization he knew that he did not remember what he saw. He was shocked. It had been such a wonderful sight. If only he could remember!
But he knew it was better that way. It was what he learned that was important. He explained to the others that baptism really was important, just as important as he was always taught. But inside he really did not think he was ready. He did not want to get baptized yet. But most of all, he learned that just because he wasn’t baptized yet didn’t mean that he couldn’t do his best to be a good person.
---------------------

Nrrrnnn. Nrrrnnn. Nrrrnnn. Nrrrnnn. Nrrrnnn. The boy leaned up and reached for the alarm. Nrrrnnn. Nrrrnnn. Nrrrnnn. He flicked the switch and the sound stopped. He flopped back on his back, stunned. He rarely remembered his dreams, but this one stuck in his mind. The beginning had some extra stuff about hippos and giraffes, but after that... wow.
When he thought about it the rest of the day at school, the boy realized that he had known his answer all along. The dream, he decided, was just the way that he told himself. But he always wondered if it was something more, and what he had seen in that little hole.
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Last Edited by spruce58052; 01-08-2007 at 04:33 PM. Reason: Reply With Quote
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Old 12-11-2006, 09:05 PM
serval sword serval sword is offline
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Re: The Dream of Hope *a true story* (Fan/Con)

Wow thats pretty good!! :-]
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Old 12-11-2006, 10:04 PM
spruce58052 United_States spruce58052 is offline
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Re: The Dream of Hope *a true story* (Fan/Con)

Thank you. I'm not nearly finished with it, since I only wrote it today. Of course, feel free to critique.
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Old 12-11-2006, 10:12 PM
serval sword serval sword is offline
Goron
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Re: The Dream of Hope *a true story* (Fan/Con)

So you'll write more?
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Old 12-11-2006, 10:18 PM
spruce58052 United_States spruce58052 is offline
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Re: The Dream of Hope *a true story* (Fan/Con)

Probably not quite like this. I don't have as many experiences I hold as fondly. However, I am developing characters for some fiction. Eventually I will begin writing those.
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Old 12-11-2006, 10:21 PM
serval sword serval sword is offline
Goron
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Re: The Dream of Hope *a true story* (Fan/Con)

Hm... I'm very intrested!
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Old 12-11-2006, 10:23 PM
spruce58052 United_States spruce58052 is offline
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Re: The Dream of Hope *a true story* (Fan/Con)

Hmm... Then if you would like to see, private message me. I'm not quite ready to actually post anything, and no sense in cluttering this thread.
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Last Edited by spruce58052; 12-11-2006 at 10:36 PM. Reason: Reply With Quote
  #8 (permalink)   [ ]
Old 12-11-2006, 10:37 PM
serval sword serval sword is offline
Goron
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Re: The Dream of Hope *a true story* (Fan/Con)

I can't PM you for some reason, it can't find your name.
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Old 12-12-2006, 04:59 PM
spruce58052 United_States spruce58052 is offline
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Re: The Dream of Hope *a true story* (Fan/Con)

It's right here on these posts. Just click spruce58052 and then 'send a private message to spruce58052'.

This is only the first draft of this story. I would highly appreciate it if someone would bother to peer edit when they have time.
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Old 12-13-2006, 02:17 PM
Zelda23 Zelda23 is a female United States Zelda23 is offline
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Re: The Dream of Hope *a true story* (Fan/Con)

That's a good story and I liked it a lot. I can't wait for more stories. Keep it up!
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Old 01-08-2007, 04:36 PM
spruce58052 United_States spruce58052 is offline
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Re: The Dream of Hope *a true story* (Fan/Con)

I edited my story today. I'm trying to improve my writing style in it. I can't decide whether or not to use quotes for dialouge in the dream.

What do all of you think? (anyone who has read it)
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