Circumstancial Inspirations

Originally Posted by SwordOfFarore

Here's a poem that i wrote in 6th grade for a project (people laughed at me for it though)...

Not here, m'dear. You need to create your own thread, not post your poem in another's. ^^

Will return to your poem Andurhil, as soon as I am possessed of the ample luxury to concentrate upon it... =D

That poem struck me as sincere and heartwarming, Andúrhil. Though, it seems a little ironic that you made her different from the other distressing damsels, when she seemed to have given you some distress in a couple of stanzas.

I think, SOF, that you're supposed to create your own thread for your own poems.

EDITED: Okay, posted too late.

Originally Posted by Val

That poem struck me as sincere and heartwarming, Andúrhil. Though, it seems a little ironic that you made her different from the other distressing damsels, when she seemed to have given you some distress in a couple of stanzas.

Ah, but you see, the only distress this damsel brings is because of the writer's actual feelings for her, which overwhelm him when she's gone, instead of emotional pain caused to him by "other" damsels purposefully

But yeah, it's quite a cheerful/feel-good composition.

Catch me as I fall

Back to my digital recluse
Where I'm truly free
No pain of seperation
No vanity for glee

Trying to find the meaning
The words behind the lie
My heart forever careening
In a sea of blood-red dye

Muffled in commitment
Ludicrous the shame
Angered bloody paradigm
Of this fruitless game

No-one to hear out
All this pain I've known
No-one to hold me
When I feel so alone

I long to let go
I don't want to know
I need to let go
And I surely know

Let my mind show
What my touch cannot
Look past these shackles
For they are not

Smothered by my emotion
I want to let go
Lost in my inner commotion
I have to let go

Even as your smile lifts me
I find myself falling again

I'm falling
There's no stopping
I'm falling
With grim foreboding

"Catch me as I Fall" is wonderful, I love it, but it's a bit sad ._. It conveys a sense of determination and desperation, but also of hopelessness. Amazing regardless.

And "You" is just so sweet! It seems to stray from the more usual angsty cliches of love songs/poems, which only makes it better. The end is cute...

Oh, and how I love you baby
Won't you stay with me tonight
You be my pretty damsel
And I'll be your shining knight

I like it =].

"Interstellar Affection" is both unique and beautiful. The rhythm seems to bring things to somewhat of a halt at the end of each stanza, and yet everything just flows together nicely. Also, props to your use of the cosmic theme without making it sound too cheesy =].

Undying affinity
Your eyes my infinity
Love is forever
In our cosmic endeavor
Our hearts as one

Favorite, definately.

Do you realize that your last stanzas are always the best?