Unknown Album-songs of a non-existent band's debut album

Yeah, so...I've started a band that doesn't exist. And I've written songs for the first album. And they've been sitting around for...ever. And instead of them gathering dust somewhere on my computer, I've decided to unleash them onto ZU. I'm sorry. Critiques encouraged, whether positive or negative. Hell, you can call these the crappiest pieces of asterisks ever *probably are-how's that for self-confidence!*



By the way, copyrighted, all rights reserved, etc. etc. on all these songs. Also, these are in order for the most part.

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Message in A Bottle Named “Perhaps Those Times Were Better, Perhaps These Times Will Be” Discovered on a Boat Stranded In The Middle of the Ocean
By the time you read this, it’ll be too late for me
I’ll get what I get, and I’ll get what I got coming
You might not know me, but that won’t matter
Let me tell you a story, and maybe you’ll see
I got what I got, and I got nothing

Curtain opens…


Tongue Twister
Locked eyes, locked lips, locked up, locked out
Looked up, looked forward, looked here, looked down
A princess and not even a toad
Just a pig with an ugly snout
Double chins, double faces, double lives
I slit a sheet, a sheet I slit
Gonna **** up, might as well just say ****
Life doesn’t hand you **** (throws it in your face)

There’s a question on the tip of my tongue
But the experience in the subject’s much too young
No one goes anywhere until they get flung



This Piece of **** Gets Two Thumbs Up
The universe has no sense of direction
Heaven could be hell, hell, it could be heaven
This universe gives off no sense of direction
I’m just building nothing out of something
I give you action, and you give me nothing
(I give you action, and I give you nothing)

Oh, but don’t worry
If there’s the slightest chance in hell
You’ll be sure I won’t hurry
Oh, but don’t you worry
If there’s a chance, I won’t take it

Our geographical maps really mean nothing
How do we know if the compass does something?
It only stays the same, its little tiny, tiny extension
I seem to have made just the littlest impression
This universe extends just in every direction

Oh, but don’t worry
If there’s the slightest chance in hell
You’ll be sure I won’t hurry
Oh, but don’t you worry
If there’s a chance, I won’t take it

You smile, point twice, thumbs up
You smile, point twice, thumbs up
You smile, point twice, thumbs up
You smile, point twice, thumbs up

The universe gives no clear distinction
Which way, which way, which way, which way, is this direction?



A View of Athena from the Bottom of Hierarchy
A wise old mouse, so modest in looks, once made a note
It will all float on alright, but how can I float?
When the captain’s distracted?
When the ship’s off course? (Are we dead?)
It’s your fault, you’re the problem source
The cider for eyes
The exemplar (of some idea called perfection)

With charm and poise and a simple line
He got you brainwashed, you think he’s fine
I’m the one, the one good bet
You just don’t know it yet

The sooner we die,
The sooner we’re worth something
One fifty a barrel

And oh, I’m sure I won’t be missed
And I’m positive you most certainly will
But don’t you worry, I’m sure I’ll be fine
Likely the last thing on your mind
(Quite the opposite of mine)

What a cruel sadist
If He were to exist
How devilish He can be
But, of course, of course
Well, it had to be me
The punch line itself
The ‘**** up’ personified

Montreal, Georgia, you showed your own desolation
Your problematic scenery stopped my own devastation

Nothing more heartbreaking
Than to fall for Athena
When you know the reference


Jammed Ejection Seat
Mayday! Mayday! This ship’s going down
Your water’s ****ing cold since there’s nobody around
I was inches from the moon, never thinking I could drown
We’re both falling from the sky
But I’m the one that’ll hit the ground

Something, something, somewhere, somehow, something went wrong
Or maybe just your scenery was the same for too long
I don’t know exactly just what went wrong
But hypothermia will be kicking in before it’s too long

Mayday! Mayday! This pilot’s been abandoned
Ship’s losing all control now that our team’s been disbanded
Our team’s been disbanded*

Now I’m suffocating under all this water pressure
I’m fatally expanding under this thick atmosphere
My mind’s gotten dumber despite natural selection

Mayday! Mayday! So this is how it feels like right before you die!
The ground’s rushing up, yet I can’t even cry
You unraveled me, and used me to wipe all of your ****
Then threw me to the ground, so disgusted by it

Hahahaha! Congratulations! You’ve won the game
Too bad the only other player was somebody lamed
Hahahaha! I must admit that I lost
I do hope you enjoy it despite the life that it cost!


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Continued in next post.

How People Live
Sometimes I wish
I was somewhat, somewhere, somehow, someone other than this

I’m speeding through life on a treadmill that’s going only 2.5
Everything around me’s a blur,
I might know who you are, but I don’t know who you were

This is the longest test and you won’t pass


Third Satellite
These walls are crumbling and we can see everything we want now
We can see the reasons, we can see the who, the what, the where, the how
They’ll take you in, they’ll take away your pain, but please don’t take me now
Your life’s a blink; it comes and goes and goes and goes and goes, it’s gone
We might be wrong, but useless morals will not let us make it right
We’re nothing but some solar satellite
Just chemicals combining to make light
I know its right but it does not feel right
You’ve told me yours and I’ll tell you that God, I just really hope you’re right
But we’re nothing more than some solar satellite

The flow will stop when the iron rusts
The information will be lost when the data corrupts
When you feel like you can’t do much of anything
It’d feel better if you just lay down and died

I should have told you all that I love you
But it’s too late right now
If I had the chance, I’d do it again
And again and again and oh god, I would do it again
But there’s nothing special about us
We’re just living on some tiny revolving orb, just some tiny revolving orb
This information is too much for just one simple man to absorb
My three legs are tired now, I think I’ll just sit down and rest
Sit down and rest and then rest and rest and rest until I’m gone


August Six Through Nine
Silhouettes
Blanketed in ash
Displayed on the walls of
Ghost towns with no ghosts

The wind blows
On the nonexistent leaves of
Dead trees, twisted and mangled
Whistling

Foreign languages shout out
A universal message
All who hear it cry with them
As they disintegrate
Leaving nothing but silhouettes

The invisible still leave shadows


Modern Sirens
I’m thinking and I’m thinking that I’m thinking wrong
You’re looking and I’m thinking that you’re looking wrong
You’re looking and your looking like I’m looking wrong
And I’m thinking that you’re thinking that I’m looking wrong

Broke a vase then you broke his heart
His car’s driving off a cliff, has yet to even start
Morally blank, you took apart this young man

Oooh, Beelzebub looks damn pretty
Nothing out of place, yet so damn ****ty
Toy around and eat them all gritty with no remorse
Oooh, Beelzebub looks so damn ****ty
All dressed up, looking so damn pretty
Not sure whether to fear or feel pity
Many friends, laughing and all giddy

Go on sirens, sing your song
Here’s a sailor you can eat all day long
Your perception's much better than you
Cut the ropes, swim across the ocean
I know that I’ve lost but I’ll think that I won
Close my eyes so I won’t see how you look
The abyss gazes also, that is the hook and the catch


****ed Up Romanticism
Romeo, Romeo, wherefore art thou Romeo?
I don’t know who you are but to the grave for you I’d go

Fifteen years old is too young to die


This Is Just A Pit Stop
So now we’re driving, driving, driving, driving, driving down the road
With nowhere, nowhere, nowhere, nowhere, nowhere to go
We were talking, talking, talking, talking, talking about some things we know
All the while, while, while, while missing all our favorite shows

Power lines and trees and grass and power trees lined up in lines
Cement and paint and painted cement and cemented paint
Greens and blues and grays and yellow and greens and blue grays
Children, children, children, children, children dressed up like men
Women, women, women, women, women all dressed up like men
And the men, men, men, men, men, men dressed up like children
Gasoline and diesel and fountain soda but no biodiesel
Drink, drink, drink, drink, drink it up and spit it out
Wipe it off your mouth and realize that there’s no way out
Know you’ll be driving, driving, driving, driving, driving down the road
With nowhere, nowhere, nowhere, nowhere, nowhere that you’ll ever go


______________________________________
And there you go. There was anothed song entitled "Moon Pulls Ocean" but it sucked *more than these do* so it's a work in progress. So...criticize away.

They are all pretty good. Some could be a little longer, but its alright.

Yeah, but songs repeat themselves often, you know?

Yeah thats true, thats why I said alright.

Anything else? Rhyming problems, etc.?

Rhyming the same word together feels strange sometimes to say and hear. But no nothing else, its all good man.

MOAR!

Scientists Have a Twisted Sense of Humor

Satellite out in the distance, distance
Lonely, lonely, lonely
Orbiting around, all the same distant, distant
Solely, solely, solely
Its orbit decays, and so it comes closer, closer
Slowly, slowly, slowly
Burns up though, doesn’t live, no sir, no sir
Toasty, toasty, toasty
On top of the world, for a while at least, at least
Highly, highly, highly
But falling towards it always, deceased, deceased
Empty, empty, empty

Satellites keep falling, keep on frying, keep on frying
Much, much longer after we’ve stopped lying, we’ve stopped lying
Satellites keep going, keep on trying, keep on trying
Much, much longer after we’ve stopped crying, we’ve stopped crying
Satellites keep looking, keep on prying, keep on prying
Much, much longer after we’ve stopped trying, we’ve stopped trying
Satellites keep going, keep on scribing, keep on scribing
Much, much longer after we’ve stopped vying, we’ve stopped vying
Satellites keep going, keep on flying, keep on flying
Much, much longer after we’ve stopped dying, we’ve stopped dying


We’re Not Cats

It’s now just about 2 a.m.
The doors open, they’re running in
The doctors all try to save him
Cause he’s not a cat

Not much earlier that night
His parents woke up with the fright
That their son tried to take his life
But he’s not a cat

It’s now about ten o’clock
He has just finished his documentation
Of what he’s gonna do
Loaded the chamber and with a pull
He’s still not a cat

Tomorrow, they’re gonna ask him why
And this is what he’s going to reply:
“I wanted to know what was on that side,
Too bad I’m not a cat”

Nobody will ever understand
The kid’s idea, his master plan
They don’t know how he slipped through like sand
He could never be a cat

Nine times the same thing it tried
And nine times the same way it died
It’s obvious, it’s clear to see
That was one stupid cat

And...

Tree Bleeds Sweetly

Out of the ocean, of the land, into the parking lot
Get your claws, get your spear, get your phone
From dumb to smart to dumb again
You don’t know, you don’t know what you got
The ocean breathed life, and it will suck in death
Best get ready, be prepared to hold your breath

The trees bleed sweetly, just drink it all in
Drink up, drink up, drink up all your sin
The animals build tasty, just gobble them down
Throw away the skin; make the bones into a crown

Out of the dark, out of the gas, into the sea
Get your quarks, get your trons, get your bonds
From simple to complex back to simple again
You don’t know, you don’t know your ancestry
The universe expanded life, and will collapse in death
Best get ready to do more than hold your breath

If there’s nothing, what’s the point of living
Just to wait for your death?
Meaningless, the moon and the sun
You’ll always be alone, cause you can’t be more than one

The trees bleed sweetly, just drink it all in
Drink up, drink up, drink up all your sin
The animals build tasty, just gobble them down
Throw away the skin; make the bones into a crown


Lenina That Haunted Him

I come from a different world than you
That makes me savage in your view
You don’t understand what I spout off
Ah, but no one else does too
You want me, you want me, I want you off
That makes me queer in your view
I find that odd, coming from you

Impudent strumpet!
You kiss and you hump it
The casual, you jump it
While smelling the trumpets

I have a different point of view
And that makes me a savage to you
Only I can quote it off
Ah, but he can too
Only, just that he took it off
And he kept it all from you
Seems wrong from my point of view

Impudent strumpet!
You kiss and you hump it
The casual, you jump it
Downing pills, smelling trumpets

I want you, you want me too
But that means different for me and for you
I love you, you have no clue


Oceana

Turbulent tides, sea sickness, throw it up, up, up, up, upon the ground
The sea seems serene for the other sailors
And the captain laughs at your misfortune, knowing all too well he’s the one sourcing
And scorching and burning and destroying, but still no abortion
And all the while King Oceana just keeps on sloshing
And this and that and that and that and that
Aww, **** it, might as well just hang up our hats
Admit that we lost, lost it all, all, all, all, all upon the ground

Well, yes, it’s true that the ocean breathes salty
With humidity that attracts your odors so faulty
And the captain just laughs at your misfortune, knowing all too well he’s the one beginning
And spitting, and hitting, and suffocating, but still not one whole duration
And all the while King Oceana just keeps on sloshing
On this and that and that and that and that
Aww, **** it, might as well just soak it in our hats
Admit that we lost it all, all, all, all, all upon the ground

Damn that siren, won’t let me get near
That ungodly catchy tune never ceases to penetrate my ear
Even when she’s not here
Bringing the concern of the piers

You might die, but that’s just simply not enough
You might die, but that’s just not enough
You might die, that’s not enough
You might die, that’s enough
You might, that’s not
You might die
You might
But you won’t

Churn goes the song machine...

Altruisms

Don’t go towards the light!
Stay here in the dark
It gets scary all by yourself
Let’s get selfish! It’ll be alright
Better place, that’s not for you
This is the place, in post World War II
Where the people are many
And the morals are few
If you want something to do
Then just chew, chew, chew
This cabaret may be vicious
But the humor will leave you in stitches
After which you can suckle the *****es
Who forgot the Mr. to their Mrs.
And she’ll scream when she pisses
Because you put her in stitches
There’s the good and the decent
And then there are humans too
Malthus would be happy
If the winds just blew
Winter or summer, doesn’t matter
It’ll still be the death of me and you
The cockroaches will survive
Spitting image of their creator
And towards goals will they all strive
Don’t go towards the light!
Stay in hell, keep up the fight
Let’s get selfish! It’ll be alright…

From author Lunchbox (that sounds nice) comes the next song...

This Is Heaven

We’re sun-bathing on the sand
Out in front is the ocean so grand
The smells smell nice
And the weather even better
So perfect we’ve burned all our sweaters

My wife looks great
Double D’s all for me
Tanned and toned, just the right shade
Every damn night, I totally get laid
She’s so damn smart too
We’ve got it made

Wars no longer seem to exist
Now, seems that no one ever gets pissed
We’re all friends here, we’re all nice
We’ve all got something different
To add a little spice

I go to bed happy, wake up the same
Never a day does life seem lame
Nothing too radical, nothing too tame
Utopia is boring
What a damn shame

Holy **** you've got a lot of time on your hands...
It makes me laugh when you swear in these poems...
They really are like songs!
"Double D's all for me"

I think I have an erection from your masterful songwriting skills.

You write songs on a level that I've only seen matched by...well, me.
And it many of them remind me of Senses Fail. Just the sort of thing they'd sing, you know?

So, yeah. Fifteen thumbs up.

Originally Posted by Neo

I think I have an erection from your masterful songwriting skills.

(1)You write songs on a level that I've only seen matched by...well, me.
And it many of them remind me of (2)Senses Fail. Just the sort of thing they'd sing, you know?

So, yeah. Fifteen thumbs up.

1. Conceited much? Or is that an insult?
2. Senses Fail? Really? I don't like them at all. I don't know the quality of the lyrics, but, their music...*shudders*. Still I'll take it as a compliment.

Forum hiccups are teh suxxorz.

Here is my new poem/song *again*. It was irspired by Devia Erasmus' thread in the Serious Discussion board.

The Chess-Playing Nihilist

It always ends in checkmate, no matter how you play
Go through it all, you’ll still find yourself dead at the end of the day
Your comrades fall, and with each fall, you’re left weaker
You stay put and you hide, and you tell her to go seek her
God doesn’t help you, for he doesn’t care
All he ever does is his Thousand Yard Stare
And he stares in the distance, and he stares right there
And he stares and he stares and he stares
Killing your enemy’s the best way to win
But what is the point if it’s all going to end, anyway?
Your movements are lateral, you’re going nowhere
All you can do is look in front of you…
And stare
The chess-playing nihilist, he ruffles his hair
The movements were wrong, so he doesn’t care
It all ends the same, we all end up there
In God’s Thousand Yard Stare
Killing is worthless, it keeps you alive
It makes you stronger and strengthens your strive
To be there, a-live
Murder or treason, they’re already dead
God forbid that on us, you tread
The chess-playing nihilist, he ruffles his hair
The movements were wrong, so he doesn’t care
It all ends the same, we all end up there
In God’s Thousand Yard Stare
The chess-playing nihilist, no longer he flings
He got up from the table and laid down his king
And he grabbed his coat and collected his things
And he tried not to show that he did try to cling
But his grip was weak

;_;




That was good.