Some Poetic Universe...

Here's one of my poems that I am willing to show you all.

Living Forever ©

Think about living forever... It's such virtue
It was drawn out to be realized
As the dawn of men never will suffice
If you think about living forever
It will be next to wish a new life...

Drama's twice split into the egotistical sides
Here in an hour, out of the body to breath, fastening the truth of what hasn't been realised
At this floor.

Here we are, standing upon the celestial plains
In the vessel, October's limelight twitch the lining space
Scattered column
Embracing the shots of inconsistency
Facing time's ending fall
On the floor.
It is gone before... The sight of the human's race
Here we are facing time's biggest fall in God's dismay

Of all hymns, with a bow and binding scream to remind us of that is who we are.

Into the loss
Beriddled of who, what's standing it's right infront of you
Unto the zone, belittled as I take my form in your glistening view
Unstable, the grudge within that carries you
Unstable as I change with the azure skies of the typical use
Sides of this norm brought us a happening of disputes
In symbols, Stuttering an echo like a hoard of devils flying to the noose
Of the dawn, these modern day seraphim haven't promised truth...

So... um... thoughts, comments and stuff are welcome. x.x

Wow, Bluehorn, this work is fantastic! Your use of vocabulary is really effective and the way your poems read is inspiring! Keep it up!

I like poetry, and I have to say you hae the mind of a genius. Is...this about the Rapture or some "End of the World" thing?
I have pretty colorful vocabulary AND I write a bit myself.

So... COMPLICATED. O: Your vocabulary is very big. Reading that took a lot of my mental energy. 8D;; But that's just saying something about my own brain, not yours. ANYWHO. Great start to your thread, any chance of sharing more?