Holden Plays Paper Mario: The Thousand Year Door

Spoiler: Table of Contents  

01. Prologue
02. Chapter 1 (1)
03. Chapter 1 (2)
04. Chapter 1 (3)
05. Intermission
06. Chapter 2 (1)
07. Chapter 2 (2)
08. Chapter 2 (3)
09. Chapter 2 (4)
10. Intermission (1)
11. Intermission (2)
12. Chapter 3 (1)

Spoiler: Introduction  

I had mentioned via IM to some pals (who you may see join in the commentary here and there) that I had never finished either Paper Mario games. I never owned the first one; I borrowed it from my cousin to play it, but I had to return it before I was done with it. And while I owned TTYD, I never got to completing it. Being the good friends they are, my buddies said, "WTF PLAY PAPER MARIO." And so I did! I finished the first game in, like, three days. @_@ It was pretty awesome. I've never gotten past Lavalava Island, and it's been so long since I've last played it that everything felt new.

So now, as I start TTYD, I'm realizing that I don't remember anything about it. Which means that it should be really fun to see me play though it. Without further ado:

Spoiler: Prologue  

Our story opens quietly at the home of Mario Mario and Luigi Mario*...

Spoiler: *  

*The Mario movie is canon, right???

Oooh, a letter! I wonder who it could be from.




A letter from Princess Peach!! It says here that she's gone exploring outside of the Mushroom Kingdom... And she has a treasure map! (I had completely forgotten what this game is about. Treasure. Cool.)

Holden: i have completely forgotten everything about what this game is about
Holden: there's a treasure map involved? cool
Gamzee: maybe if mario finds it he could finally afford that haircut

Aaaah, Roguetown. Smells like poverty. Immediately upon arriving on the dock, I walked straight off of it and into the ocean.

Holden: okay
Holden: note: don't fall into the water
Holden: mario is made out of paper
Gamzee: myth busted

And of course, as soon as I found my feet, I saw that there was some ~trouble~ afoot:




A damsel in distress!







An easy battle~

Holden: what is the girl goomba's name
Holden: goombette?
Eternal Legend: goombella
Pietro: goompeach
Holden: ah okay
Holden: goomdaisy
Intrigue: goomhilda
Eternal Legend: goom♥♥♥♥♥ella
Gamzee: goomtella
Holden: nutella
Gamzee: 'xactly
Nesi: I heard Nutella
Nesi: hello

As it was, even the Professor (when we found him) didn't know her name either.

The young lady I had rescued introduced herself as Goombella.




No, the other one.







My task was to find the Professor, who could shed some light on the treasure map that Peach had attached with her letter.

While I explored the town, I witnessed first hand what kind of city Rougeville was. There was poverty, thievery, and all sorts of ruckus! An aptly named town.

Also, the beds were really expensive.

Holden: ffff wait what it costs money to sleep in a bed
Holden: i would never get this kind of service in the mushroom kingdom!!!
Gamzee: it's one of "those" motels
Gamzee:
Holden: ooooooh
Gamzee: this isn't the princess' kingdom no more

At least the entertainment was nice. Pretty good live act. Kinda creepy, though.




Hmmmmm.






By accident!!! Oh well... *This chick* is going to block the path to the west wing of Roguetown until I can get her some replacement lenses.







We found the professor in the east side of town. He told Goombella and Mario about a hidden ~treasure~. When he learned I had the map... Well, he was quite flabbergasted.










We entered the sewers on our way to the Thousand Year Door, where we would hold aloft the Mystical Treasure Map™ as legend had it and... do something magical? The details allude me at the moment, I'm afraid.

We ran into these chumps, who Goombella promptly told off. We engaged in battle with them, and they were swiftly and righteously defeated.







I found this treasure chest within the sewers. He wanted me to stick my big black key into his hole. I obliged.













Aaaaaaaaaaaah!







We made it to the Thousand Year Door. I held up the treasure map. It began to react! Magically! (Of course.) The path to the first Crystal Star* was revealed!

Spoiler: *  

The seven Crystal Stars are needed in order to open the Thousand Year Door.

The adventure begins!

Starting TTYD right after the original Paper Mario, it was immediately apparent that the mechanics and devices of the franchise were considerably improved.

Everything in the game is just... bigger. Rogueport, as a hub town, is, from what I've seen, bigger than Toad Town. And I haven't even visited any of the blocked off areas yet!

Battles are a whole lot more dynamic than they were before. On top of the established action commands, TTYD introduces "supergaurding" which is more or less a means of counterattacking. I dig it. Your partner can use items now, finally. They also have their own health points. (I'm guessing they can level up, too? Or is it going to be like the last game where they get super or ultra ranked?) That's bound to add a bit more depth to my strategies. The special powers in this game are a bit more interactive. The first power you get let's you replenish your HP and FP, like the first star power in the previous game. But this time there's a bit of a minigame to it, and how well you do in the minigame effects how many HP and FP points you get. The audience also adds a bit more fun to the game. You have to rile them up to charge up your special points, and sometimes baddies will sit in on your fights and throw things at you.

Also, Mario's "curse!" The fact that Mario can, like, turn into a paper airplane is super cool. It makes the game feel more... oh, paper. Like I said in the chat, whereas the first game is more Storybook Mario, TTYD really is Paper Mario.

I'm pretty excited to play this. Maybe this time I'll finish it, even!

So, those are my thoughts, until next time~

I think a screenshot LP might be a first for this forum! I've been meaning to play this game myself. I loved the original, but the opening to TTYD is just so slow, it's turned me off to it both times I've tried.

Spoiler: Chapter 1 (1)  

Back into the sewers. I use my new found ability to turn into a paper airplane to my advantage and explore a previously blocked off area. I exit through a door and find myself at a dock.













Platforms appear after I've made mincemeat sushi out of the blooper. They lead to a pipe. Mario swirls into the depths of the pipe, the screen fades to black...







Petal Meadows! Goombella and I take a bit of time to make sense of our surroundings before setting off. We make it to a strange, stone structure. I try and hit the marked pillars with my hammer, in the hopes that something'll happen. Nope! I figure that the markings are actually slots for keys of some sort. As we move to go deeper into the Meadows, a great shadow is cast over us.










Big dragon! Biiig draaagon!! I actually remember this one. Hooktail! He'll be the chapter's boss.

I continue on through the fields. I find a pipe that leads me up to a badge I can't reach. Oh, how I miss Kooper! Though I'm taking this as confirmation that I'll be getting a koopa party member pretty soon.

I fight a few enemies, enough that I ~level up~.

Holden: leveled up!!
Buu: I am proud of Holden

Eventually, I reach a town called Petalburg. I'm told that I have to speak to the mayor. He lives in a big pink house. But I'm in no rush.

Holden: in petalburg
Holden: why are there, like pirahnas in the water
Holden: that i keep falling into
Holden: also who is this flamboyantly dressed elvis circus dog
Holden: who is french, also
Silver: oh he stalks you
Holden: fun!!
Silver: There is no water that is safe to swim in
Holden: i never had to put up with this in the mushroom kingdom
Avalanchemike: xDD
Avalanchemike: the Mushroom Kingdom has a well funded Ministry of Fisheries and Ocean.
Avalanchemike: They can prevent invasionary fish species like the snakehead fish.

I also happen to walk into a home where I find a koopa who's built himself some kind of a shrine to Princess Peach.

Eventually I find the mayor.







Looks like my suspicious were right about the stones in Petal Meadows.

Holden: wait how does mario get email
Holden: does he carry around a smart phone
Holden: how do people get his email???
Holden: is it in the email directory
Nesi: Mario has better equipment than I do
Nesi: and he's a plumber
Nesi: dammit Eastern Europe

Before I leave town to find the stone keys, a nervous koopa runs up to me. He tries to say something, but then he leaves out of embarrassment.

Holden: aww, poor koops
Holden: he's shy
Silver: yep

I exit town in search of the stone keys. I fight a few fights*, rustle a few bushes, hammer a few trees. At the end of the path, I find a stone fortress where two stone goombas lay in wait.

Spoiler: *  

Holden: aaah the audience is trying to give me mushrooms
Holden: and i keep stompin them
Silver: dick
Buu: I imagine Holden being a musician
Buu: girl tries to throw up panties
Buu: Holden just slaps them away

Holden: how do you hurt these stone goombas
Holden: hammer
Silver: is it one of the ones in the fortress
Holden: yeah
Silver: you need a pow block
Holden: used power smash and a mystery item
Holden: pow block may have been easier, since it would have hit both though
Holden: and i just got one
Holden: oh well
Silver: you definitely need a pow block for the next one
Silver: their defense is insane AND they're immune to both hammers and jumps

Used a POW block in the second fortress.

In the next path, I found a free inn coupon, and a recharge block that you have to pay to use. Why is everyone so greedy in this game?? I would never get treated like this in the Mushroom Kingdom!!

There's a third fortress at the very, very end of the path.

Holden: 65th super fun quirk quiz
Silver: I love the quirk quiz
Holden: what is the name of the mayor of petalburg?
Holden: a) kooskoos b) burtle c) moopa d) kroop
Buu: xDD
Buu: KOOSKOOS
Buu: COUSCOUS
Holden: IS THAT IT
Holden: IS THAT THE ANSWER
Holden: WROOONG
Holden: fffff buu
Gamzee: kroop
Gamzee: you suck buu
Gamzee: omg
Gamzee: i think
Gamzee: its kroop
Gamzee: it sounds right
Holden: too late
Holden: got it wrong, THANKS
Buu: WHAT NO, I didn't say it was the answer
Buu: I was laughing at the name
Buu: Of course it's not kooskoos, it sounds like couscous . - .
Buu: GEEZ HOLDEN
Holden: OMG BUU YOU'RE KILLING ME
Buu: GEEEEEEEZ HOLDEN
Buu: GEEEEEZ
Silver: you FAILED
Holden: ;______________;
Holden: if i mess up the next question i have to fight him right
Silver: yep
Silver: and it's impossible
Holden: wait there's more than five questions
Holden: what number question is this? d) super question 64
Silver: that one
Holden: hell yeah i correctly answered five questions
Silver: congrats

The statue moves and reveals a pipe. Mario flushes into it~




There are two exits in the room Mario finds himself in. At the end of each path is one of the two stone keys. I level up again at some point. When I return to the exit pipe, I find this little bugger waiting for me.
















I hate fuzzies, aaaaaaaaaaah.

IN THE NEXT EPISODE OF TTYD Z OUR HERO USES THE STONE KEYS AND MAYBE FINISHES THE CHAPTER!!!!!!

This is surprisingly interesting to follow!

I love this. This is good. Florina approves!

I approve. Far easier to follow than all those video LPs.

I like it, and not just because I'm an egomaniac who likes seeing a chat log of me in your LP.

Good job and good screenshot choices.

Spoiler: Chapter 1 (2)  

With the stone keys in tow, I scamper back to the Meadows. As I exit town, a voice calls out for me...










Koops has joined the party~! Sweet! (Obvs, the first thing I did was go and get that badge.) It's really nice to see Koops on the team. He's a really meek character that's just beggin' for some character development. A few hours hangin' with the Mario squad and he'll be a right ol' OG* when I'm through with him. And when it's all done, he'll settle down and find a nice girl.

Spoiler: *  

Original Gangster

With Koops, Mario makes it to the stone structures and places the stone keys in their place like a child fits a square shaped block through a square shaped hole.

And then it's off to Hooktail's castle.







While Koops is a timid person, he manages to stifle his anxieties while journeying with Mario. Because, you see, he's doing this "hero thing" to prove something. That he's not just some craven koopa. That he can DO something. His dad went off to Hooktail's Castle to fight the dragon, never to return; Koops would succeed (for himself and his father) where his father couldn't.

I explore the castle a little. There's a recharge block in the first room--THAT'S ONE COIN MORE THAN THE LAST ONE I SAW. I would. never. get this kind of service. in. the. Mushroom. Kingdom.

In the next area is a broken bridge. I try to peer over it, and being clumsy, I fall through. I brace myself for water...... Yet it never comes. Phew! The one time that falling randomly works out for me. I hop around on the platforms under the bridge and use Koops' shell to nab a badge.

I backtrack a little and transform into a paper airplane so that Mario can fly over the gaping hole in the bridge and continue through the castle.




In the next room, I have to take a step back for a moment because there are dry bones EVERYWHERE. At least, I think they're dry bones at first. My stomach makes a sickening flip as I realize they're just regular bones--the last remains of those few brave koopas that tried to rise against the vile Hooktail.
















The remains aren't those of Koops' father! There may still be some hope then... I'm actually unsure of how long ago Koops' father went to Hooktail's Castle. Maybe he could still be alive? Held prisoner? ...Or he could already be dragon-feed.

Nevertheless, we have Hooktail's weakness. The dude hates crickets.

Holden: kolorado's dad
Buu: I love Kolorado
Buu: I think his name is Charles in the Japanese version.
Buu: That is weird.
Buu: Or well
Holden: like darwin
Buu: CHARUZU
Holden: charuzu darwin
Nesi: looool

We continue to explore the castle. I find a Shine Sprite. I think I've found one or two others during my journey. I have noooo idea what they do. I'm guessing I cash them in for skill points or trade them for badges somewhere. Maybe they have a role in upgrading your party members? (If someone wants to tell me they can do that. I give them permission.)

I go through some more battles, enough that Koops and Mario become quite fatigued. It strikes me now that I should have used my special skill to get health--but that really wouldn't have made a good story any way. Where's the DANGER in that?! Where's the EXCITEMENT?!

Either way, I ended up running away from a lot of battles. Imagine my embarrassment--after I'd paid 6 coins to heal--that dry bones only take one good hit to defeat.

We pass into a room where I spy a familiar black chest...













NoOooOoOOoooooo!

The new "curse" does come in handy though. Mario can walk through the bars of cages in the castle with ease.










We journey deeper into the castle, looking for a lock to use the key on. We climb a large set of stairs and find a locked door. Before I use it, I go around the corner of the hall and spy a badge set off on a raised platform.

Holden: why can't you jump and cast koops shell
Holden: that should be a thing
Silver: I don't know
Silver: I guess they figured he's afraid of heights
Holden: haha
Holden: yes
Holden: there's a badge in hooktail's castle
Holden: but this badge is on another level than the steps i was on
Silver: Oh there's a block upstairs that you need
Gamzee: you'd think with all these badges there'd be a badger in this game
Silver: I love badgers!
Silver: EULALIAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!
Holden: eualia!!

Edit:

Harrie: That one star above koops there is kinda like
Harrie: like it's one of those star stickers
Harrie: which are like 'at least you tried, have a gold star'
Harrie: YOU TRIED KOOPS
Holden: haha brilliant
Holden: i am editing that comment in

With Silver's advice in mind, I equip the badge I'd found earlier.

Then it's off through the locked door. I battle some more enemies, etc etc. I find another locked door. But I have no key. I go into the room opposite the door and find that there's already somebody in it.















Hmmm. I have a feeling we'll be seeing her again.

In the locked off room, I spy a controllable platform in the way of a badge. I move it out of the way--down, down it goes--and use Koops' shell to nab the badge. I start to walk away... but then I get an idea. If falling into a gaping hole (before, on the bridge) turned out alright before, why shouldn't it work again this time? I brace myself and fall a long way down, plop right onto the platform, and find myself at the badge set away before. Haha! It's mine now, suckers!

Spoiler: Chapter 1 (3)  

I make my way up to the peak of the castle. In battle, I discover how much more dynamic the action really is in TTYD in comparison to the original Paper Mario when Koops is hopped on by a spiked goomba and flipped over onto his shell.r Mario when Koops is hopped on by a spiked goomba and flipped over* onto his shell.

Spoiler: *  

If you look into the audience, you'll see Luigi is among them. Hey, bro!

When we make it to the top, I gladly give up six coins to heal, and then save. I take a deep breath, remembering how I'd been told that the battle with Hooktail was gonna be awful, but then I recall the badge I had equipped. If crickets really *were* Hooktail's weakness, then maybe I'd be alright...














































The battle is long, but not as bad as I had expected. The sound FX badge I found really seemed to be doing the trick! And when Hooktail began to plead with Mario for mercy--why, I knew it was just a trick.

But then the unexpected happened... Hooktail flew down into the audience and began to eat the crowd assembled to replenish health.




It was horrid! I couldn't contain my panic. But Koops--Koops was all *game*



















The battle is won! We did the impossible--we had defeated Hooktail. But before we could began celebrating, the dragon's great body began to writhe. Monstrous groans escaped from the monster's scaly lips. And then--something began to move up the monster's throat, and a single blue shell shot of of Hooktail's mouth and landed beside us.






















And as the chapter ended, I felt, for the first time, like something had gone right in this new and odd place. Despite the villians of Rogueport, despite the five-coin motels--despite all that, I felt like I was on the right track.

But one question still lay on my mind...

Holden: fighting hooooktail
Silver: good thing you didn't make the same mistake I did
Silver: when I first fought him I was too dumb to realise you're supposed to equip the badge
Silver: I won but it was a tough fight and I blew through my entire item supply
Holden: goin' for the claws
Holden: aimin' low
Silver: Oh, and did you know
Silver: Hooktail is actually
Silver: a woman
Holden: whaaaat really
Silver: yep
Silver: another boss refers to her as a she
Holden: nice
Holden: backdrop just fell
Holden: used an action command right on time
Silver: yeah sometimes the stage malfunctions
Silver: they get more elaborate as the game goes on
Holden: perfect
Silver: I think once I was killed by the backdrop falling, haha
Holden: dang that's gotta hurt
Holden: hooktail is now trying to buy me off with coins, badges, and scantly clad women
Silver: haha
Silver: I keep telling myself I'll accept just to see what happens, but I never have
Holden: aaaaaah
Holden: not the audience!!!
Silver: If you jump on her nose you can save them
Holden: yep, doin it
Holden: i take on the head, koops gets the shoes
Holden: well, that was easy
Silver: :D

when I first started playing TTYD, I was hunting high and low for an actual cricket item
and at no point did I think to check that attack fx badge, because Paper Mario conditioned me into thinking those were useless. :D



I'm not used to screenshot LPs! it's an interesting change. :> and also enjoyable so far!

Spoiler: Intermission  

The game cuts away to an intermission between Chapter 1 and 2. In this intermission, we find out where Peach has been, what Bowser is up to, and where the next Crystal Star is.

Episode 1: Peach

A transition plays, and we see the Princess in the hand of the same hooligans we saw when we arrived at Rogueport.













It looks as if Mario isn't the only one after the Crystal Stars after all! Somehow, Grodus learned that Peach had the treasure map. What kind of power does this guy hold? It seems like his minions are even more formidable than Bowser's--but not by much. Grodus summons the Shadow Sirens--three purple ghosts*--to find the next Crystal Star and stop Mario from getting at it.

Spoiler: *  

I realized too late that my screenshot wasn't too good, so you get this image I found on Google instead!

The X-Nauts lock Peach away in her room. She does some exploring and find a large tub in the bathroom. With nothing better to do, she showers and exits the room with a new hairstyle (which I really liked; shame it didn't stick after you leave the room). When Peach enters the main room, the lights flicker and the exit to her room opens unbidden. She explores a little and finds a computer, TEC, in another room. And it looks like TEC may be experiencing some feelings his programming didn't prepare him for.

TEC lets Peach use his keyboard to send an email to Mario, and then he wishes the Princess a goodnight.


Episode 2: Bowser













Geez Bowser, I mean, wow man. Why you gotta be so possessive. Let other people kidnap the Princess, too. I mean, I think that's gotta be part of some Bad Guy initiation or something.

It's totally cool that you get to control Bowser though. Am I gonna get to fight with him? If so, I am going to have so much fun with his fire breath.


Episode 3: Mario

First thing that happens when we get control of Mario again is this lovely scene: Koops saying farewell to the village. He promises everyone that he's going to be stronger and that he'll be back in no time.

We exit the village and immediately get an email from Peach saying she's alright, though she doesn't know where she is.

To find the next Crystal Star, Mario has to raise the treasure map before the Thousand Year Door again. As it was... I got a bit lost. I explored the sewers a bit more, using my new ability to become FLAT STANLEY. I find this room of spikes that I'm guessing I'll need a boo party member to pass through unharmed*. I also find this loose bit of paneling that I also needs the boo partner (who I get next, if I recall correctly). I'm guessing she'll have both those abilities? Like, holding X makes me transparent and tapping it uncovers hidden panels. Something like that.

Spoiler: *  

In the last game, your party member Bow would turn you transparent--LIKE A ~~GHOST~~

I also find this pipe with a sign next to it that reads: PIT OF 100 TRIALS.

Holden: what is the pit of 100 trials
Holden: is there cake there
Silver: It's a bonus dungeon
Silver: As you are now though it's probably best to wait until after chapter 2 to start it
Silver: every tenth floor has a treasure and exit pipe
Holden: yeah, in the intermission right now
Silver: it's similar to the savage labyrinth in TWW
Holden: also, i get the boo/buu* partner next right
Holden: madame boobage
Silver: Ja
Liah: its the boss that is harder than the final boss that usually pops up in an rpg
Liah: at the end of it all
Silver: Yeah
Liah: bonetail i think
Liah: i think?
Silver: Yep
Liah: k lol
Holden: fuuuuun
Buu:

Originally Posted by Holden

madame boobage

FLURRIE.
Buu: She is so sassy.

Spoiler: *  

Buu informs me that Flurrie is not actually a boo and is actually a ~wind spirit~.

Eventually, I get un-lost and find the Door.

Holden: lol, professor frankly said "crystal clear"
Holden: i'm colleting crystal stars
Holden: geddit

And the next area is revealed! We're off to Boggly Woods!


Aside: Florina explains to me what Shine Sprites do:

Florina: Shine sprites are used to upgrade your party members. you go to that house next to Franklys and you find a Merlon there and he upgrades your guys for 3 shine sprites
Florina:
Holden: oooooh
Holden: okay

Spoiler: Chapter 2 (1)  

I upped Koops' rank because I had three Shine Sprites, and then it was to the sewers to find the pipe to Boggly Woods. I... got lost. Again. But only because I didn't have any inkling of where the pipe could be. I'd explored the whole place already, hadn't I? (Of course, I fell into water like twenty times. What I want to know is why the people of this kingdom put robotic pirahnas into their water. NEVER IN THE MUSHROOM KINGDOM. I'm assuming at some point I get a party member that swims, because I spied this platform across the narrow sea.)

But, eventually, I cam upon a small creature lurking in the underlevels of the sewers. Curious, I followed after it.



















And so, I had a lead! Punio, the cute lil guy, led me to a secret entrance, where a pipe to the Woods waited.







OKAY, GET THIS: THE FIRST PEOPLE I ENCOUNTER ARE THE SHADOW SIRENS... [size=1]and they don't even recognize me. How is that supposed to make me feel??[/i] Apparantly they had a wanted poster, but they lost it. Good. I'm a glad. They probably got my nose all wrong.

Either way, I end up overhearing their conversation:




I have a feeling this necklace will come back into play at some point. (Spoilers: It does.)













When we get to the Great Tree, Punio is alarmed to find the entrance to the tree to be blocked off. It seems the X-Nauts got there before we did.




We look for a secret entrance, but to no avail. We can't locate it. But perhaps there's someone who can...







So we set off to find her.

SOMEWHERE OFF IN THE DISTANCE




We make it to Madame Flurrie's home and find her locked in her room.









So it was her necklace the Shadow Sirens had found!

(Geez, Mario, why do you look like that. Don't you get it. The Madame just wants to look ~fabulous~ ... No, I guess not. You *wouldn't* get it, le sigh. And you and your overalls never will~)

Spoiler: Chapter 2 (2)  

Flurrie refuses to join the party until she finds her necklace. Of course, we know where it is... but.

It really helps that right as our hero receives this task, the Sirens find the wanted poster they'd lost:









Koops and Mario backtrack a little. When we make it back to the beginning of the Woods, we find the Sirens waiting for us.










After the battle is over, the Sirens exclaim that they may have underestimated Mario's prowess. I have a feeling that won't be the last we'll see of them.

Holden: the three sirens
Holden: they remind me of that one movie
Holden: with the three witches
Holden: and the dude that got turned into a cat
Gamzee: hercules
Silver: Macbeth
Gamzee: sabrina the teenage witch?
Silver: Harry Potter?
Holden: just looked up "movie where dude gets turned into a cat by three witches"
Holden: oh okay
Holden: it's called Hocus Pocus
Holden: that movie's crazy, man
Silver: didn't they show that on the disney channel
Holden: yes. Yes they did.

Holden: flurrie joins the party
Florina: shes got mad bosoms for a mario character
Holden: madame boobage
Florina: yes
Gamzee: you'll find she's pretty good at blowing
Florina:
Florina: oh god chris
Holden: oh ho ho
Silver: and look where mario grips
Holden: yeah haha
Holden: my brother kept telling me it was her hand
Holden: and i'm just like, nah
Holden: mario, you dooog
Florina: lawl!
Florina: (this should so go into your LP)
Holden: (OBVIOUSLY)

With the Madame, Mario and Punio head back for the Great Tree. Along the way, I receive an email, some kind of newsletter from Roguesport.

At the Great Tree, we use the Madame's Wind Spirit powers to blow away a loose bit of paper and reveal the secret entrance to the Tree. Punio uses the entrance to get inside and unlock the main door for us.








































Okay. Okay. We know the sitch now. We haven't really encountered the X-Nauts too much before, and while I don't think they'll be too much trouble, I really don't know their abilities. And this rival Jabbi tribe... Hmm.

Well, either way, Mario's got a tree to save. Allons-y!

Spoiler: Chapter 2 (3)  

From the ledge of the window, a figure shrouded in shadow crouches low and prepares to strike... The X-Naut doesn't even see it coming.




Mario, Flurrie, and Punio journey up the Great Tree in search of the rest of the Punies. We battle a couple of X-Nauts, and I'm a little upset by the fact that they do 3 damage each. And that I suck at counterattacking. Best to stick with defending.

We find the remaining Punies locked away in a red and blue cage. The Puni Elder is locked in the red cage, and Punio's sister and the rest of the Puni community is in the blue cage.

Punio vows to rescue the Punies and we go into the next room. There, we find a familiar face...

Florina: i also love how all the significant ladies in this game have the severe hots for Mario
Florina: they are all "STACHE! HNNGH"
Holden: the stache, man
Holden: it's magic
Florina: magic stache

We find the red key in the room and head back to free the Elder. The Elder, without realizing that the cage has been opened, gives Punio a big schpeal about how he has to become responsible if he's to be the leader of the Punies one day yada yada yada. Then the Elder realizes that the cage is open and goes down to the base of the tree and orders the Punies we'd met earlier to join Mario's party.













We encounter our first Jabbi near the top of the tree. The Jabbies look like mosquitoes, as far as I can tell. Punio muses about the rival tribe, wondering if they'r really all as bad as we've been told.

There are two paths before the group. I take the far one, out of curiosity, and find a Jabbi hive. As the Jabbies file out of the hive and into battle formation, I realize THERE ARE A LOT OF THEM. I flee before the battle can begin and go to the other room. There's a Jabbi hive there, too, but there are far less Jabbies in this one, so I feel okay with engaging them.







We defeat the Jabbies! The Punies flood into the hive and destroy it from the inside. A door is revealed, and in the other room I find a blue key. Some backtracking, a heartwarming reuniting of brother and sister, and a few battles later, and I've bolstered my ranks quite considerably.

The next thing to do is to go back to the other room and face down the larger Jabbi army.




Huzzah! The battle is a bit tough. Flurrie helps out by using her wind power to knock Jabbies against the wall in the confusion of the confrontation.

In the next room, however, the Puni army I had assembled is promptly trapped by the X-Nauts.





I manage to slink out by using my Flat Stanley powers, and Mario vows to break the Punies out as soon as he can. We take a nearby pipe lower into the tree, and we find an odd arrangement of familiar statues--we had encountered similar structures earlier. I backtrack to the previous arrangement and reorganize them into the pattern I was shown.

When the pattern is inputted, the statues peel away and a secret room is revealed.













Niiiice. Now I can spin jump, and my jump's attack power should be upped now as well. Now I might have a way to save the Punies. I've seen plenty of these patched X's while exploring the tree. All I've got to do now is break through and see what's in store.

(Today will be a lazy post with little commentary because I feel like the screenshots I took really speak for themselves.)

Spoiler: Chapter 2 (4)  

I blast a hole in the bottom of the Punies' cell with my new spin jump ability. To quote Gamzee, "♥♥♥♥ the police."




We all make our way to the very roots of the tree. Using a secret elevator, we puǝɔsǝp.



































































And then I leveled up~

Holden: "Increases max HP by 5! Great if you lack confidence!"
Holden: what's that supposed to mean???
Silver: It means you are WEAK BABY MAN

Holden: beat the chapter
Buu: *applauds*
Silver: grats
Silver: Now you get to go to the BEST CHAPTER EVER
Buu: Don't get disheartened when the Puni Elder yells at you.
Buu: She means well.

THIS POST COMES TO YOU IN THREE (3) PARTS:

Spoiler: Intermission (1)  

Part 1: X-Nauts and Peach










AAHAhahahfasdfasdfaf we really got you didn't we???A?DFS! Try sending another team to stop us from getting the next Crystal Star!!! I dare you@@!!!

Also, there's a bit here where Peach talks to TEC about what "fun" is (no, not "fun.") Then Peach sends an email to Mario.


Part 2: BOW-WOWSER










This sequence was super fun and reminiscent of the Mario platformers. Headbutting blocks, destroying pipes, and frying X-Nauts was a really nice change of pace to the normal gameplay of the game.













"................................................. ."




"................................................. ."













Aaaaand that was that. SILLY BOW-WOWSER.


Part 3: Mario


First thing that happened was Mario received an email from Peach. Blah blah same thing as last time, pretty much.

Mario and Flurrie then headed off to the sewers so that we could get to the Door and find the location of the next Crystal Star. (Along the way, I used Flurrie's ability to uncover this chest. There was a badge inside~)

IN OUR NEXT EPISODE MARIO GOES UNDERCOVER IN ORDER TO FIND THE DON. WHAT CRAZY THING WILL OUR HERO DO NEXT?!?!?!!

Spoiler: Intermission (2)  

Because the Don lives on the westside of Rogueport, I had to find a contact lens to get the one lady out of the way. I went to the store and special ordered one and gave it to her when it came in.







Now that Mario had patched things up, the gal introduced herself as the culinary expert Zess T. She offered to cook goods up for me anytime I wanted. I demoed her kitchen with a fireflower, and I got some soup out of it.

Then it was off through the entrance she was blocking:

Holden: the westside of rogueport is so much nicer looking
Florina: haha yes
Silver: You're on your way to GLITZVILLE*?
Florina: he is!
Silver:

Spoiler: *  

For about as long as I've been playing, I've been told to hurry up and get to Glitzville. It's the favorite chapter of a lot of the guys in the group. That said, there'll be a lot of commentary from them once we start Chapter 3.

I switched my party member out for Goombella, who gave me the rundown on this part of town.

Spying a sewage grate in the center of the street, I Flat Stanley-ed down it. The area of the Roguesport underground was unfamiliar. I explored for a bit, and found a familiar patch, but it was blocked off by a fallen pillar. There were cracks along it, so I guessed that I'd get a Bomb-omb partner at some point. I traveled in the sewers some more until I came upon this, an underground civilization:

Holden: aaah i went down the grate
Holden: no idea where i am in the sewers now
Holden: oookay that's how you get out
Holden: not lost anymore it's cool guys
Florina: TOWN UNDER TOWN! :O
Holden: oooh wow
Holden: there are people living here i think
Holden: i see some walking around
Holden: and there are like doors
Florina: uh huh and its awesome
Holden: suspicious
Holden: yes!
Florina: and a shop
Florina: i mean...who buys gold bars and why?

Holden: omg
Holden: water i don’t die in
Holden: this water is shallow enough to walk in
Holden: yessss
Florina: tis a fountain or...ruins of one
Florina: hey..check behind junk...
Silver:

Originally Posted by Florina

i mean...who buys gold bars and why?

aparrently they're for storing money
Great White North: ^
Great White North: Storage of VALUE anyway
Silver:the mushroom kingdom needs to go back to the gold standard
Silver: Ron Popple for Mushroom Kingdom Prime Minister, 2012

I found my way back to town and explored the westside for a bit. Off to the northern border was a train station, and a blimp far off in the background that I was told would lead me to Glitzville. When I asked for passage there, I was told I'd need a ticket. Hmmm.

Holden: also
Holden: this train
Holden: looks like the batmobile of trains
Holden: or a limo
Florina: hehe i love that train
Florina: i love the lakitu whos all "hnngh train!"
Florina: and no one is all "hnngh blimp!" makes me sad for that cheep cheep guy

It looked like I'd need to find the Don if I wanted to get a ticket.










Don Pianta. Wadda guy.

I combed the town for the Don's daughter. I headed for the docks, thinking they might be making a run for it by way of sea. Entering the docks, I noticed someone new--a large, green rat. They told me about an oil prospect they hoped to take advantage of, and asked for an investment. The group told me he was legit, so I gave him what I could spare (200 coins).

I found Francessca and her bo Frankie down at the docks, as I'd guessed. After talking to them for a bit, I realized, hey, these crazy kids are in love. So I was left with a bit of a dilemma. Did I really want to break them up just so I could get to Glitzville? What mattered more? Finding some treasure behind the Thousand Year Door, even if I had to stomp on people like Francessca and Frankie to get at it?




The decision was made. I'd face the results like the mustachioed man of a man I was.













Francessca and Frankie broke onto the scene. Francessca begged with her father not to punish Frankie, to know that it was her idea to elope. Frankie begged for forgiveness, and told the Don that he loved his daughter, he really did. And it kinda went on like that for a bit.



















Ta-da! It looked like everything had solved itself out in the end after all. And the Don, a man of his word, gave me the blimp ticket he'd promised.




And then it was straight to the station, and Mario and co. were off to Glitzville.

Spoiler: Chapter 3 (1)  

Holden: in glitzville
Holden: just landed
Florina: YAY
Holden: i have to fight Mr. Big Hair here
Holden: that should be fun i think
Nesi: never fight with hair
Holden: oh, i do gurl
Nesi: good man
Gamzee:

Originally Posted by Holden

Mr. Big Hair

me??
Holden: yes

Silver: RAWWWWWWWWWWWK HAWWWWWWWWWWWWWWK
Silver: FEEL THE RAAAAAAAWWWWWWWWWK
Florina: omg he's the best

And thus, I became a fighter. Off to find riches and glory. The bossman, Grubba, then proceeded to give a tour of the premise. He showed off the champion's room, the major league locker rooms, and then took me back to the office. (Here's the minor league locker room, which I'd get to soon enough.)

Florina: THE GREAT GONZALES!
Silver: GONZALEEEEEEEEEEEEEES
Holden: GET READY TO FEEL THE GONZALESSS

Rinse. Repeat. I fought the Goomba Bros., these guys, these guys, these guys, and then some.

I took a break from battling and headed outside, where there was a kerfuffle between a hot dog vendor and an exotic egg he'd hoped to make a meal out of.

Holden: COME BACK HERE EGG
Silver: notice how the chinese hot dog man is a pig
Silver: RACISM
Holden: yaaay jumpy egg joined the party
Holden: my pokedex says it's very close to hatching
Silver: oh this is the togepi
Holden: does it hatch if i walk around or can i does it need battles to hatch
Silver: it hatches at a preset point
Silver: so just keep winning
Holden: yes, as charlie sheen would say

I visited the juice bar next and heard an interesting tidbit about Rawk Hawk. Also: French Disco Elvis Pink Afro Dog was there.

Holden: DISCO DOG
Holden: HE FOLLOWED ME TO GLITZVILLE
Silver: call cleauseu
Nesi: ceaucescu
Nesi: I think
Nesi: but it has Romanian letters
Silver: That's the romanian dictator nesi
Silver: not the french detective
Silver: pink panther
Holden: YEAH COME ON NESI

Eventually, the moment came for me to face my last match of the minor league. THE IRON ADONIS BROTHERS, BRING IT ON.

...or not.

Holden: the iron adonis bros have red and green shoes
Holden: like mario and luigi
Silver: gonna make the big leagues son
Holden: jeez can't make a hit
Holden: even with counters
Holden: i smell foul
Silver: run awaaaaaay
Holden: can you do that?
Silver: yep
Holden: okay, doin' it
Holden: they told me to take a bath
Holden: offense taken

Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door is one of my top favourite games of all time.

I'd like to see your LPs someday.

^ You can read them right now, even. Hit the "show" button on all of the espoilers I've made.