Would you want a boy or girl?

new idea everyones different thereby making this discussion a waste of ValaVrada's, yours and my time.

Nobody's asking your opinion. You choose to invoke my response, I'm not begging for yours, either.

Boys and girls are quite different, Snapdragon. They aren't an incompatible set of different species or anything. It's just that girls are widely known to be very abrasive from ages thirteen to seventeen. After that they're very pleasant. During that short period though they are nigh intolerable.

EDIT: Not that guys can't be. They are, often. It's still a common, infamous trait of females that age. And yes, I ****ing know that there are exceptions to generalizations like that.

there are certainly some genetically based behavioral differences between male and female humans. There are also certainly exceptions to every rule. But stereotypes and generalizations aren't always based on nothing.

Originally Posted by Andy

Nobody's asking your opinion. You choose to invoke my response, I'm not begging for yours, either.

Boys and girls are quite different, Snapdragon. They aren't an incompatible set of different species or anything. It's just that girls are widely known to be very abrasive from ages thirteen to seventeen. After that they're very pleasant. During that short period though they are nigh intolerable.

EDIT: Not that guys can't be. They are, often. It's still a common, infamous trait of females that age. And yes, I ****ing know that there are exceptions to generalizations like that.

I'm not so sure about that. Most girls I knew back at school weren't abrasive and intolerable, as you say - and I daresay I wasn't intolerable either (at least, I hope not!).

I would have a baby boy!baby boys are sooooo cute!

I would want a boy preferably.

I don't really care.
I'd like to have both.
Poll's not big enough.

Originally Posted by Astarael

I'm not so sure about that. Most girls I knew back at school weren't abrasive and intolerable, as you say - and I daresay I wasn't intolerable either (at least, I hope not!).

Originally Posted by Andy

yes, I ****ing know that there are exceptions to generalizations like that.

Originally Posted by Andy

I'm not denying that there are exceptions to any rule. Of course there are. Just because you've experienced the exceptions firsthand doesn't mean that it's automatically never true, or that someone who says otherwise is generalizing. That is the fallacy of accident, applying a single scenario to a whole case or group of people.

Hehe I already gots my baby girl. ^_^

Honestly for the next child, I don't know. I LOVE girls, they are so much easier to take care of and they are just SO cute. But, I think my husband wants a boy next, so he has his man of the house kid. hehe

Originally Posted by Snapdragon

many of you people creep me out in this thread, I ve said it before, but I'll say it again:
you make it sound as if boys and girls are two completely different animals.
do you think that differences in preferances and behaviour between boys and girls is something gender-specific that we are born with, or is it something we create by treating boys and girls different while growing up?

They are different. Behavior and everything. We are born with genetic blue-prints that make us behave like a boy, or like a girl.

I've been with my daughter around boys and they are much different in situations. I've talked to many mothers who have children my daughters age, and they all say boys are harder to take care of. Not by much, but most parents know this.

sugarpoultry why would you want another kid?

It's so much work and money for nothing.

Rude! It's not for nothing , Having a baby is the best thing that's ever happened to me. It's such a joy to see her smiling face every single day. There is no better feeling than holding and playing with her each day.

And it's not much of a financial burden if you are good with money and savings. We haven't struggled even once since she's been born. Plus they have programs like WIC that help pay for formula and stuff.


As for having another kid, its not going to happen for another few years, at least until we move into a house with plenty more room than we have now. But she's growing up so fast I do miss the innocent tiny little baby she started out to be.

Originally Posted by sugarpoultry

Rude! It's not for nothing , Having a baby is the best thing that's ever happened to me. It's such a joy to see her smiling face every single day. There is no better feeling than holding and playing with her each day.

And it's not much of a financial burden if you are good with money and savings. We haven't struggled even once since she's been born. Plus they have programs like WIC that help pay for formula and stuff.


As for having another kid, its not going to happen for another few years, at least until we move into a house with plenty more room than we have now. But she's growing up so fast I do miss the innocent tiny little baby she started out to be.

Oh ok, that's a little different from the situation I'm in so I guess I can sorta see where you got the "i love kids" thing from.

Money isn't much of a problem, I have lots of that, it's just that it's almost like I'm investing in something willingly knowing I'm not going to see any of it ever again. It's a lame feeling.

Originally Posted by Mafoofoo

Oh ok, that's a little different from the situation I'm in so I guess I can sorta see where you got the "i love kids" thing from.

Money isn't much of a problem, I have lots of that, it's just that it's almost like I'm investing in something willingly knowing I'm not going to see any of it ever again. It's a lame feeling.

They can be expensive, I won't lie, but they don't put you in the whole. Now that she's getting older she's doing more solids and those little cans of food can add up pretty fast.

Course when they get older, Christmas and birthday presents and all that. lol Then school. But we've saved up.

I'm more annoyed about the time commitment thing. Drive here, drive there, etc. I'm not even 26 and I have to do all this. Just have to wait 2 more years lol.

Originally Posted by sugarpoultry

They are different. Behavior and everything. We are born with genetic blue-prints that make us behave like a boy, or like a girl.

Well that is your belief, and not in any way the fact you try to make it out to be.
But please, do tell me more about these "genetic blue-prints"

Personally, I think most gender-related behaviours are social constructions created by the way we are brought up, the way people treat boys and girls different, the way society expects boys and girls to be different, and so on.

There are some physical differences between boys and girls. As for behaviour, it varies. So you can't generalise all boys behave like this and same goes for girls. It is the social environment, the way we treat boys and girls determines how they shall behave.

For example, some societies boys are expected to act big and strong! As for girls, they are expected to be nice and quiet.

"genetic blue-prints"

Children do inherit characteristics from their parents, however it still does not determine their behaviour as compared to the effect the social environment may have. The characteristics that are inherited are affected by the social environment significantly.

I grew up a very humble child, who feared her father very much.
I never asked for anything expensive, and I still don't.

Reason being, my dad was a very punishing person when I was growing up, and we never really had much money to afford things. I want my daughter to be humble like I was, but I don't want to beat her like my father did to me, so I don't really know how to raise her humbly.

Originally Posted by Snapdragon

Personally, I think most gender-related behaviours are social constructions created by the way we are brought up, the way people treat boys and girls different, the way society expects boys and girls to be different, and so on.

Certainly. People should be treated as individuals, not as exemplars of gender stereotypes. There are males who have more feminine traits, females who have more masculine traits and then there are several people who are psychologically androgynous.
Like I said before, not everyone follows the rules to their sex. Girls aren't always what you expect them to be like.
However, erinys makes a good point: stereotypes aren't based on nothing. There are many typical girls and typical guys in the world. Maybe this was how they were born. Or maybe this is due to the fact(like what Snapdragon said) that boys and girls are raised differently, with different expectations.
Gender identity is a very complicated, confusing thing...

i would want a boy so i could **** it like mj

Originally Posted by Andy

Nobody's asking your opinion. You choose to invoke my response, I'm not begging for yours, either.

Boys and girls are quite different, Snapdragon. They aren't an incompatible set of different species or anything. It's just that girls are widely known to be very abrasive from ages thirteen to seventeen. After that they're very pleasant. During that short period though they are nigh intolerable.

EDIT: Not that guys can't be. They are, often. It's still a common, infamous trait of females that age. And yes, I ****ing know that there are exceptions to generalizations like that.

do you have an off switch? I ended this by saying that everyone is different, let it go!