ZU Men's Advice thread

Originally Posted by Eijiro

My girlfriend is ****ing crazy when she gets drunk.

In the past there have been incidents involving her being too flirtacious with other guys. Last night she went out drinking with 2 of her co-workers and there wasn't too much of a problem, but she rang me and said she misses me and kept calling me baby way too much.

Is it wrong if that made me feel really uneasy? Hmm.

People tend to get a bit wacky when they've had a few, and I wouldn't be too bothered if you're getting drunken declarations of love. However, if she's being too loose or flirtatious when she's drunk, and that bothers you, you should tell her - when she's sober. Just let her know how you feel about it and see what happens. If she cares, she might try to make a difference.

I did bring up the whole flirting thing with her and she said she felt really sorry about it, especially because both times it happened she can't remember half the night. She said she'd try to lower her alcohol consumption but I don't think that's really happened haha. Last night I just felt really uneasy because it was the first time she's been out drinking without me around to stop her doing stupid ****/carry her when she's passed out on the floor.

Alcohol is good, but getting that trashed is just annoying.

Originally Posted by Eijiro

Alcohol is good, but getting that trashed is just annoying.

Agreed. I have (or had) several friends who do that on a regular basis. They're not fun to be around - I don't enjoy watching them drink themselves so oblivious that they don't even notice guys stealing a free grope. If it's getting to that stage, talk to her again. If it's something that important to you, she might try a bit harder. If she doesn't, well, I'm afraid I can't suggest anything else.

I used to do it a lot in the past, but since I met her I kind of wisened up and realised I don't need to do that to enjoy myself. I do like drinking, and I like the feeling of being a little drunk, but when you're that crazy and out of control of your own actions, then something is wrong. I will probably bring it up with her again, no doubt. It's cool though, I was just venting more than asking for advice haha.

While this is not entirely related to the topics at hand, why doesn't this image lead the first post in this thread?

A manly man for everyone to aspire to.... maybe.... maybe we can pray to him?

Originally Posted by Slur

Or if that doesn't work...Is there a set routine you go through? Once when you get up, or before you got to bed, or while you're doing work? If there is a time when you normally do it, go off and do something else. Go for a walk or count from one thousand backwards to negative one thousand. Start focusing on something else. Do yoga on Wii-Fit if you have it! xD

Yes, there is a time I usually do it. And that includes when I get up, when I go to bed, and when I am doing work. Or playing videogames, or talking on MSN, or watching videos on YouTube, or watching TV, or reading, etc. Anytime you can think of really. I'll try the rubber band thing. I'm also going to buy a weight set so that when I have the urge, I can give my left arm a different workout.

Also my friend has it even worse. I can't help but admire the fact that he has jerked it both on a plane and in an exam, neither times in the toilet.

Originally Posted by Eijiro

My girlfriend is ****ing crazy when she gets drunk.

In the past there have been incidents involving her being too flirtacious with other guys. Last night she went out drinking with 2 of her co-workers and there wasn't too much of a problem, but she rang me and said she misses me and kept calling me baby way too much.

Is it wrong if that made me feel really uneasy? Hmm.

Drunker declarations of love aren't uncommon ("A drunk man's words are a sober man's thoughts."), but if you are concerned about how much she drinks, do as someone else said and talk to her, while sober. As for you taking care of her, make sure that you being there for her while she's under the influence doesn't become a regular part of her drinking experience. She might only drink so much knowing that you'll be there to look after her. If you deny her that, it might show her that she needs to take responsibility for her own moderation, instead of relying on you.

Originally Posted by 8bit

While this is not entirely related to the topics at hand, why doesn't this image lead the first post in this thread?

A manly man for everyone to aspire to.... maybe.... maybe we can pray to him?

I agree wholeheartedly.

So, here's a question for my man-team.

In a world without jobs, how do you go about getting one? I've tried temporary employment agencies-- most of the open positions require two years' experience (wtf?) and retail and groceries aren't hiring (except during the week after I ask if they are, apparently). Nothing is working so far.

I'm trying to pull in some money writing guides for ZeldaLegends, but I doubt it'll be enough (or that Dave will be happy with paying me as much as I need as quickly as I need it).

@Lex: Ow, that's a toughie, man, especially with the state that the US economy is in right now. I was in Boson over the summer and it took me five weeks to get a job. I eventually got a job after applying to hardware store initially and then inquiring as to whether my application had been processed three weeks later. I got an interview, but I'm guessing the reason they hired me was because I had 4-5 months of experience in the field.

Be persistent - in most cases, they're more likely to hire someone that has the stones to go ask in person. Always look confident, or better yet, be confident. Look presentable - you're always out to impress the potential employer, in or out of interview. Don't limit yourself to certain fields - you can't afford to be picky during a recession. The work might be awful, but in most cases, money is money at the end of the day, and how you earn it becomes inconsequential. Family and friends with connections are always a help - that's how most people get their first jobs - but given that you're asking here, I'd hazard a guess that you don't have an awful lot of those.

That's all I can think of right now.

Originally Posted by Eijiro

I did bring up the whole flirting thing with her and she said she felt really sorry about it, especially because both times it happened she can't remember half the night. She said she'd try to lower her alcohol consumption but I don't think that's really happened haha. Last night I just felt really uneasy because it was the first time she's been out drinking without me around to stop her doing stupid ****/carry her when she's passed out on the floor.

Alcohol is good, but getting that trashed is just annoying.

She sounds like someone who probably shouldn't be drinking. Some people do not know how to handle their Drink. They just keep drinking until they are toast. Its ok to get that Initial Buzz then have some water for a bit then have a bit more to drink. Not only will you have more fun due to not passing out, but you won't leave yourself open to being taken advantage of.
I guess my other question would be, how often does she drink?

Lex: Ask some friends if there are any openings at their work. That's how I got my current job, delivering pizzas. And, as MDK said, being picky should be avoided. If you want a job in a certain industry, by all means work towards it, but keep in mind you'll need something to help you get there.

1) I'm going to sticky this thread.
2) Lex, do you have a particular skill set (experience) to leverage?

ladyjane: Relationships, particularly dealing with already-initiated ones. Apparently I'm also good at cheering people up, so general wellbeing as well. =D

MDK/Jodd: I'm applying at everything from clothing outlets to coffee and food joints to grocery stores to retail. I talk to my friends often and they hand me hints but none of these have really gotten anywhere--I've been met with these 2-years experience requirements that I can't meet, even through temporary employment agencies.

There's always McDonalds. :3

Well then Lex, I suggest a facade of confidence when you apply to places. Walk in as though you already have the job, demand to speak to the manager of the place (don't just hand a resume to some other employee), tell the manager you want a job, and just generally act as though there is damn person in the world better than you. To get a job, you have to convince your employee that you're confident, and to convince him, you have to convince yourself.

Heh, not even McDonald's is hiring. >_>

I've spoken to managers before. I've joked with them about the work when it's work I have experience in, I've talked about how slow the economy is. Inevitably I think it boils down to the economy being too shaky for enough people to be hired that I'm included in the bracket. I just have to keep trying, but at what point is trying any use (or even anything but an expense) when 99% of the time I just hear "we're not accepting applications at this time."

To Get a Job

In today's bustling, and sprawling economic downturn, there are indeed few jobs available in the open market. There is always the option to work for the university you attend, those greedy monsters have more money than Jesus. But there is the chance of working through networking, or getting a job through a friend or by frequenting a place so much that you know everyone there. It is an amazing and quick way to obtain employment.

If all else fails, get Kassi's high heels, hike up your skirt, and start working the corners. You are in California after all...

There is this girl I was really into, I tried to get here to go out with me 3 times but still the same answer. I got a little depressed but I got over here but now she hangs out with me and my friends. It just pisses me off becase when ever I try to talk to her she always is a jerk to me and acts like I'm always trying to impress her. I under stand that being a slighly geeky sadist and a serious pryo can be a turn off but I mean come on I have only been nice to here and she is still being a jerk for nothing. Some advice would be gratly apresheated.

If a girl isn't into you, it's best to just move on. Eventually, they might come around. Girls are fundamentally the same, in that they desire what they don't/can't have. Be that; unattainable.

Originally Posted by jman#1

There is this girl I was really into, I tried to get here to go out with me 3 times but still the same answer. I got a little depressed but I got over here but now she hangs out with me and my friends. It just pisses me off becase when ever I try to talk to her she always is a jerk to me and acts like I'm always trying to impress her. I under stand that being a slighly geeky sadist and a serious pryo can be a turn off but I mean come on I have only been nice to here and she is still being a jerk for nothing. Some advice would be gratly apresheated.

Like Jodd just said "If a girl isn't into you, it's best to just move on.". As you may (or may not) know, going out with a friend changes things, but so does simply asking the girl out. Now she knows that you'd rather be dating her than just being friends. It seems to me that she's still under the impression that you're going to ask her out again, while she was happier the way things were beforehand.

My advice to you is this: Don't try to hard next time. Just ask a girl once. If she declines, I'm sorry (it happens), however, that also means that she's open to asking YOU out if she ever changes her mind. That, or wait for the right moment (which can be hard do explain in words...it's just a feeling).

As for the now, talk to her, but open up with an appology: "I'm sorry I asked you out (INSERT GIRL'S NAME). If I knew that this is how you would react from it, I wouldn't have done so in the first place. I was taking a chance, and got burned. Can you blame me? I just want things to go back to the way things were. Do you think that can happen?"

Remember, no matter how pissed off you may be towards her, don't start the conversation with an angry tone, or she'll return it to you ten fold. Just be sincere.

-BGS

PS: To all of the men who seek advice: I think I speak for the rest of the team in saying that we'd appreciate to hear back from you and see if our advice was a success or not. Remember, every life, person, and situation is different, so we're only giving advice by what information you're giving us, and by what we know by.