(Didn't know if I should put this here or in the Community section.)
I've been an ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ to you guys.
For as long as I've been a member here, I've butted heads with some mod or another. Why? I know you guys are only doing your jobs. So why am I such an ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ whenever I find myself in your crosshairs? I'm the one who put myself there. I'm a good member who loves this site and tries to follow the rules. But I'm not perfect. And when I'm corrected by a staff member, I take it personally and blow it waaay out of proportion, only digging a deeper hole for myself. I know that I'm definitely not a favorite subject among the mods. And looking at my post count and join date, it's a miracle I haven't been permabanned yet. I've been a huge drama llama the vast majority of the time that I've been here. I've treated y'all like the boogeyman, whereas we should really be friends.
I've been a member for six years, and yet I don't feel close to anyone here, the exact opposite of how it should be, given the time I've spent here with you guys. I blame myself for being such an ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ most of that time. You'd think I'd have some kind if bipolar issue. I'm nice and loving until something happens, then I blow things way out of proportion and make myself look like a jerk. I should have many friends here on ZU, but I fear I'm more infamous than anything. And I have only myself to blame.
And yet it's been six years, and despite all the drama and enemies I've created (especially among the mods), I'm still here. If I truly hated you guys, I doubt I'd still be here. No, my problem is obviously behavioral. I take things too personally and then emotionally react to them.
And for this, I am deeply, deeply sorry. I am sorry that I have tarnished our friendship or maybe even ruined future friendships. I am sorry that I have been such an ass during the majority of my time here. You guys are only doing your jobs, so I should respect that. I love you guys, and I'm sorry that I've been a problem for you.
Here's to six more years. I won't ♥♥♥♥ them up this time.
Honestly? It's all good (: I appreciate the apology and... it's refreshing to come across because more often than not I'll get a complaint in my inbox about doin' mah job here, though if I ever do do something that is outta line, you and anyone else are well within your right to call me out. I can only hope that I practice what I preach here, so any ♥♥♥♥ ups on my end, tell me.
I don't hold anything against you, I promise, and serious respect for being ballsy enough to post something like this.
I'm really happy to see a message like this. In all honesty, I don't know the details of your past with the staff, since I am not even here a solid year yet. However, I kind of got a minor sense that there was tension based on the thread last summer in the GCC where members were free to voice their objections/concerns about ZU. If I remember correctly, I believe I spoke with you in a few PMs trying to dig a little deeper to find out what the root of the animosity was.
But really, I'm so happy that you have come to the realization that it's not a personal attack when moderators have to do their job/make decisions that may not be popular with the members involved. Don't beat yourself up about feeling that way, though - it's very easy for things to be "taken the wrong way" on message boards because all you're seeing is text on a screen. We can't hear the tone of the person communicating with us. I know I've found myself in several situations of online communication (not just on ZU) where I find myself wondering if the person I'm talking to is upset or annoyed with me! But then I try to step back and think I am overreacting/worrying too much.
So once again, don't be hard on yourself - the past is the past, and in my eyes, it's never too late to make things good again which I think you have done. ^__^ I hope to get to know you more, and I hope you get closer with everyone else on the staff too!
- - -
The World is closed by the walls
The birds are the only creatures allowed to fly beyond the walls
The birds are known for delivering forgotten dreams
Ok heres the skinny, Blizzmang, its awesome you made this thread. Really it is.
You and i have had some mild skirmishes in this department. I feel that yeah, its because you take it way to heart. When i post or make a PM to you in regards to one of your threads or something, its never personal. But you seemed to make it so. Im just all "umm...nah mang. Its not like that." I felt like you didnt believe me. Maybe in the past, i got really frustrated with you (i think that happened) and i was like "omg..." The last time i talked to you about mini-modding your own threads, i was all "oh hey, let us take care of that." and yer like "sdjfhgdsjfg" I felt kinda like "but thats not what i meant..."
So i want you to know we look out for you and the other members. Im glad you see it this way now. Cuz really, no beef.
ALSO WHY HAVE YOU STOPPED DOING YOUR QUESTIONS OF THE DAY ON SWAPNOTE YOU POOP!!! :p
You can still PM me for the clan test! A Dream of Ice And Fire: 4900-2186-7042 Animal Crossing Dream Suite
Blizz and I had a PM conversation a bit earlier today.
I sought him with a semi-issue and with my answer regarding it - which Blizz disagreed with. However, he proved to handle a situation maturely, he didn't make it harder when I turned to him with something as a mod, and we could come up with a solution that I believe was acceptable for both of us AND for the community I'm responsible for. I genuinely feel this compromise was a great success - and encouraging for me as a baby mod, and for him because aw, this thread.
Blizz, I genuinely hope to see you around a lot. While we haven't developed a super close relationship over the years, I certainly consider you a valuable asset of our community. Thank you for this thread, it really shows a great amount of dedication and courage; you're fantastic, bro.
---------- Post added at 12:41 AM ---------- Previous post was at 12:41 AM ----------
I can really appreciate that you want to apologize. I mean hell, I did the same thing not too long ago over in GCC. Or maybe it was CC. ♥♥♥♥ if I can remember. It really shows a level of maturity that I quite frankly don't expect from many members here. It speaks volumes about you.
I know we've butted heads in the past but lately things have been pretty smooth between us, so I really don't see you having any problems with anybody else. ♥♥♥♥ happens and I think it made a lot of us lose track of what a unique and enthusiastic member you really are, myself included.
We're all human, we ♥♥♥♥ up sometimes. It happens. Don't need to beat yourself up over it
Good going, mate. I'm glad you are doing what you gotta do, and getting the lead out. I have seen you "butt heads" with some of the mods, but one time I was on your side. Granted I wasn't a part of the site when it happened, I felt the people in that thread were acting kind of stupid. But that's dead and buried. Overall, I can give you nothing but congratulations for being able to realise your mistakes and learn from them.
I know I'm not necessarily the 'staff' this was directed towards, but I did want to say thanks regardless. Due to my involvement with the forum side of things by my own volition I've seen some of the stuff you've done and yeah, I've shaken my head at times, but really, I think you're a good dude. The dedication you have to this forum is incredible and something I think is wonderful to see in a member.
And of course, whenever a mod issues a warning or infraction, it is completely unbiased, something you've pretty much said in your post. I still thought it'd be good to include here.
I enjoy your presence around the forums and hope you continue to be an active member here.
I like you blizz. I like you a lot. You are a very nice guy and you are very talented at what you do. I have very minor complaints about you. Any issues we may have had a re long gone. Not everyone is brave enough to make a mass apology thread and humble themselves like that (welcome to Club Red & Dash ♥♥♥♥ yeah).
You are fun to talk to about a wide variety of subjects. For what it's worth, I hope you stay around for many years to come. (: