The Legend of Zelda: Wind Waker: Pokémon edition (Crossover/parody)

The Legend of Zelda: Wind Waker: Pokémon edition (Crossover/parody)
Rate criticize, I'm kind of limited in jokes i can put into the prolouge do bear with me.
Part One: Prologue
Sturgeon: Hello ignore the text box, my name is Professor Palm. The World was created long ago by three goddesses after creating the world and all the mutated but adorable animals that widely inhabit it. We humans and Hylians live beside most Pokémon as semi friends (don’t mess with Torchic, trust me). At times we live together at times we work together, at times we decide we’re hungry and eat them. Some people use Pokémon for good, other use them for evil. Which reminds me, there is a long boring and unskippable legend I must tell you.


This is one legend of which the people and sapient Pokémon speak (actually there aren’t any other legends this is the only interesting thing that has happened since the world was created). Long ago there existed a kingdom where a golden and silver power lay hidden. It was a land blessed with Grass Pokémon Rock Pokémon and peace. But one day a man of great evil took this precious metal power for himself. He corrupted dark Pokémon spreading them across his kingdom. But then one all hope had died and the hour of doom seemed at hand. A young Pokémon trainer clothed in a green baseball hat/headband (accounts are varied) appeared as if from nowhere. Wielding the sphere of evil’s bane the captured the dark one and gave the land candy (or was it light, I can’t remember). This boy who used a time traveling sphere to save the land was known as the Hero of Balls (time would have had less sexual innuendo).

The boy’s tale was repeated by an irritating teal Chatot until no one could get it out of their heads. But then one day a fell wind began to blow across Hyrule. Someone was apparently stupid enough to pick the Sphere of evil’s bane and release the evil. Predictably it assembly an evil team and attempted to use the power of a legendary Pokémon to take over the world again.

Despite the fact that the hero hadn’ t been seen in years they believed he would come again to save them. But he was on an alternate timeline, saving an alternate world from an alternate moon. Being completely intolerant of any kind of political change, they instead opted to leave their fate to the highly volatile goddesses. Though they could have easily could train another Pokémon team to combat evil, they were p***ies and did absolutely nothing. Someone spilled coffee on the part of the legend which told us what happened next. Somehow we know of this kingdom‘s legend, but not of the kingdom itself. We force Pokémon trainer’s to wear silly green outfits at the age of 10. They had they sense of making them use little monsters to fight evil
.
Where was I again? Oh yes. As well as researching esoteric legends I am a Pokémon Professor.

Are you a boy or a girl?


Player: Selects girl.


Sturgeon: Too bad sucker! You’re playing as Link.

The way the story just goes straight in is perfect for me. It makes a description while holding interest.

This isn't a horrible problem, but the second paragraph has a few notes too many. It's as if it's trying to include another paragraph in it you didn't hear earlier.

But, the humor you include is perfect. It doesn't go off-topic and keeps the reader even more interested.

Overall, I think I'd rate this a 8/10. 10 being the most perfect thing ever (so you know how high a ten is in my view).

Well, that was interesting. I thought I was the only one who had a LOZ and Pokemon crossover in my mind. Except it was Ocarina of Time based.

Now that I think about it, maybe I should do something similar to this. But I'd think it'd be wiser if I ask if it's okay. I don't want to seem like I'm copying anything, and I'm not.

Goron Moron, you can steal the concept but not the jokes. I don't think it was a hard idea to come up with. I actually will be waiting for it. FOr Comparison's sake.

Part 2: Introduction
Backround Music of the Chapter: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jfIbBt1eLXE
Aryll: Link! Link! (sees a Buterfree) Oo a Buterfree! What was I doing oh yeah Link! Big Brother.
Link: (Wakes up) I told you I’m not your Big brother I’m a girl who Nintendo forces to play as a male. I’m not your sister either technically.
Aryll: Don’t be silly Big Brother girls don’t play video games.
Link: :0 That’s sexist.
Aryll: No it’s not.
Link: Yes it is:
Aryll: No its not.
Link: Yes it is.
Aryll: Hey there’s some Wingull. I love Wingull. Must pull feathers.
Link: (thinking) this is the Legend of Zelda there aren’t any Pokémon here. Oh my God. Someone must have hacked this game.
Aryll: Oh, Link with my ADD I forgot. Link Grandma has a present for you. She wants you to wear a green headband in the memory of the Hero of Balls.
Link: (Whoever hacked this game is an immature sexist teenage boy).
Aryll: Come back later and I’ll give you a present.
Link: I’d rather you just apologize.
Aryll: Giving presents is a rich girl’s apology.
Link: As long as it’s something good, like a Wii.
Aryll: LOL
Link: Sony fan girl
(rolls continuously to Grandma’ house)
I wonder, why do I move faster when rolling?
YouTube - RickRoll'D
Link: That doesn't explain anything.
Grandma: Hello Link, your voice sounds so much higher today.
Link: That’s because Nintendo refuses to dump the rescue the princess plotline and Zelda has no gender options.
Grandma: I don’t quite understand what you’re talking about but that could just be my Alzheimer’s. Our family has a history of mental illnesses. I wonder what problem you’ll develop.
Link: In context of this game I’m transgender.
Grandma: Very good, you lucked out I remember your father had Huntington’s disease, and your mother was chronically depressed. Transgender is a very safe mental problem. I suppose these things pop up when you’re population never exceeds 20 and you live on a tiny island. You and your sister are the only children here. In fact I hired a Togekiss to bring a girl and a boy here to avoid further inbreeding.
Link: Ok, I’ll just assume Alzheimer’s has damaged your morality as well. Aryll has said that you have a present for me.
Grandma: Oh, yes. Here you go; it’s a green outfit just like the Hero of Balls.
Text Box:You got the Heroe's clothes. Get ready for hyperthermia.
Grandma: This came with a free pair of Running Boots.
Link: Great so can I run.
Grandma: No silly rolling is much faster.
Link: (puts on) Grandma, you know this outfit is made out of pure Mareep wool and its 90 degrees outside.
Grandma: I hate Alzheimer’s. Go to Sturgeo… I mean Professor Palm. He has your first Pokémon.
(At Sturgeon’s house).
Link: For some reason this game has been hacked. Are you really going to give me a Pokémon?
Sturgeon: Yes, Unfortunately the Swinub I was going to give you have been released. They will be at Abe’s dinner table by nightfall. I’m sorry it is illegal to recapture Pokémon that have been released. It’s one of this islands esoteric laws.
Link: Well I guess that isn’t too hard. Do you have any Pokeballs?
Sturgeon: No I don’t. And my deadbeat brother doesn’t have any either.
Link: What deadbeat brother.
Sturgeon: The one that isn’t Orca who doesn’t live directly downstairs from me.
Link: (Man I guess I can call him an absent minded professor.)
Orca: Oh, Link have you come to seek my herbal remedies, I know your family’s mental problems tend to surface at the age of ten.
Link: Orca do you have Pokeballs?
Orca: What about poking my balls?
Link: (It’s definitely a teenage boy) Okayyy. I just want a sphere OK.
Orca: Oh, spheres. Here you go.
Text Box: You got a Pokeball. Miyamoto gets revenge for “Gary”.
Link: Let’s go force a random wild animal to fight for me.
Aryll: Help Big Brother the Wingull have betrayed me.
Wild Wingull appeared.
Link: What other option do I have? Pokeball go.
Aryll: Congradulations you caught a Wingull. You have pruved the justace in our society.
Link: See, girls kick ass in video games.
Aryll: I’m sorry. But Because I actually apologized you only get to keep my present for one day.
Text Box: You got a telescope. You put the telescope in the Key Items Pocket.
Link: Cheap b****.
Aryll: Link what’s with the bleeping/and or asterisks.
Link: This Fan Fic isn’t rated T Aryll. I need to comply to forum rules.

......Why would I steal the jokes? My version would be more serious. And I didn't intend to 'steal', as my version would be completely different, and yet you said that I 'claimed' to be.

Well gee, thanks for insulting me.

Originally Posted by The Goron Moron

......Why would I steal the jokes? My version would be more serious. And I didn't intend to 'steal', as my version would be completely different, and yet you said that I 'claimed' to be.

Well gee, thanks for insulting me.

It's hilarious how serious you took that.

This is quite funny. I'm not really sure how it could be improved. =/
I love the whole thing. Keep up the good work. =D

Tbh, i think the whole "balls" thing is gonna come up too many times in this story. But other than that, relatively good idea, and quite funny.

Part Three: Birds
Background Music of the Chapter: YouTube - Zelda: Twilight Princess Music - City in the Sky
Wingull: Excuse me, would you like to give a nickname to Wingull.
Link: Wait a second, you can talk?
Wingull: Yes, all Pokémon can talk, we are given the power of speech when outside our home universe.
Link: That doesn’t really make sense.
Wingull: Neither does fish evolving into birds. Or A race of perpetual children. Or Rock eating creatures that curl up like Armodillos. Or how a prepubescent boy can carry around a s***load of stuff without a visable bag.
Aryll: I love asterisks.
Link: Point taken. How about Kaze?
Kaze: A Japanese name. You have to be an otaku.
Link: Well in the American sense of the term, yes. Anyway Aryll what should I do to make use of my limited loan on your telescope.
Aryll: Big Brother, let’s spy on that funny looking bird down there.
Link: Where you answering my question or displaying further ADD?
Aryll: What question?
Link: Whatever, spying is fun.
(points telescope at a Togekiss)
Quill: I won’t do it. It’s against my moral fiber.
Grandma: What’s a matter? Got cold feet?
Quill: It has nothing to do with my extremities, furthermore I lack any kind of feet.
Aryll: Silly literal birdie.
Grandma: I paid you to kidnap children from Windfall Island to prevent further incest. Surely perpetual inbreeding is worse than minorly inconveniencing a couple of children.
Quill: No, kidnapping children is the world’s most terrible crime. The only thing worse is invasion of privacy.
Link: Bird has priority issues. (zooms in closer)
Quill: (look up) Oh no, you obviously hired a back up bird.
Aryll: Look up Big Brother.
(Looks up)
Ho-oh: I’m a legendary Pokémon for crying out loud why I am I doing grunt work for the big pig. Kidnap your own princess.
Pirates: Much catch legendary Pokémon.
Tetra: What about me?
Pirates: We’re mutinying. We don’t need a boat when we have a huge bird on our side. (Throws ultra ball).
Ho-Oh: (Goes in ball, breaks free) Ha- Ha. You really think you can catch a legendary Pokémon without weakening it first. (Tetra Falls) Damn. Oh whatever, I’m going home to do my laundry sc*** Ganondorf.
Aryll: Big; Brother you have to rescue the pirate girl.
Link: Why should I. I’m a heterosexual female in a boy’s body. Even if I was male and straight, this is a vidoe game and there's no timer, if she’s going to live or die it’s already programmed into the game.
Aryll: There’s a bunch of Pokémon in the forest to catch.
Link: I’m in.
Kaze: Ditto
Link: I thought you were a Wingull.
(rolls to Orca's house)
Orca: I thought you’re going to rescue the pirate girl. Why are you here again?
Link: The forest is dangerous; I need a sword to protect myself.
Orca: Why? You have a Pokémon with you.
Link: He can’t chop down the trees that are blocking the path to the forest.
Kaze: Well ,what am I supposed to do spray them to death?
Orca: Swords are too dangerous for young children.
Link: And electric rats aren’t.
Orca: (Ignores Link) I have an alternate solution. I’ll use the TM I stole from my brother to teach your Wingull Steel Wing. But first a brief tutorial. Assign each of your Pokémon’s attacks and abilities to the x, y, z, or w button.
Link: There is no w button.
Kaze: What are buttons?
Orca: Yes there is, it’s the one next to the green button.
Link: Isn’t that the b button.
Orca: It’s the w button.
Kaze: I’m just giving up now.
Link: Me too.
Orca: Try to hit me. I will not be harmed.
Link: Are you sure? You are very old.
Orca: Go ahead hit me.
(wild Orca appered) (Orca did nothing)
Link: Kaze, use steel Wing.
(Kaze uses Steel Wing) (It’s super effective) (Orca fainted) (Orca has a concussion) (Kaze gained 16 exp. Points)
Kaze: Let’s get up of here.
Link: No, we can’t just leave an old man to die. (Yelling) STURGEON
Kaze: You were going to leave the pirate to die.
Link: Well that was different. Now I’m actually here and responsible for it.
Kaze: Let’s run for it.
(Rolling)
Kaze: This isn’t what I meant by run.
Link: Shut up bird. (Sees trees) Kaze quick use Steel wing on those trees.
Kaze: Look where that got us before.
Link: Just do it.
(Cuts down)
Kaze: I wonder what that sign said.
Link: It probably wasn’t important.
Sign: Cutting down trees is a federal offense.
(Climbs up hill). (Comes across bridge.)
Kaze: This looks like the archetypal rickety bridge. I don’t think we should cross. It will probably collapse before we cross.
Link: Skitty cat.
Kaze: Not funny.
(Crosses Bridge.)
Link: See it would probably take a huge a** bird to take this baby down.
Kaze: Jynxing yourself aren't you?

Part Four: Exposition
Background Music of the Chapter: YouTube - Pokemon Diamond Pearl Eterna Forest Soundrack
Kaze: It just occurs to me what the heck is Background music? Who plays it? Link. Link. Do you hear me? (Sees Link, listening to IPod without headphones.) That kind of explains it but there aren’t any Ipods in Hyrule. It’s a medieval society. How did you get these?
Link: Technology has been shown inconsistently through the Legend of Zelda Series; there have been cannons, bombs and even a jukebox. Is me listening to an IPod really a problem?
Kaze: When you put it like that no, not really.
Link: Kaze where are the wild Pokémon, Aryll said there were more Pokémon here.
Kaze: Well you haven’t stepped into the tall grass.
Link: Ok, (rolls into grass) (nothing happened) the parenthesis says nothing happened, Kaze!
Kaze: Man you are such a whiner, let’s just rescue the pirate.
Link: Maybe she stole the Pokémon, pirates steal things.
Kaze: Technically you can’t steal wild Pokémon as they by definition lack an owner, but I given up trying to reason with you.
(rolls) (crawls through logs)(climbs stumps)
Primape 1: (bokoblin) Hey look it’s a Hylian boy.
Link: Girl.
Primape 2: Whatever
Primape 1: What do you mean we can’t beat up on little girls? We’re supposed to kidnap them and take them to an evil overlord.
Primape 2: Does it matter? She can’t do anything about us that mop of feathers can.
Primape 1: Right so uh let’s start this battle.
(Two Feral Primape appeared)
Kaze: Wait a second, two against one isn’t fair.
Primape 1: Neither is a fighting Pokémon against a flying Pokémon.
Kaze: That is very poor logic.
Staravia: Time to logicafy it then.
Kaze: Where did you come from and is logicafy a word?
Staravia: Who cares, I love to kick A**
Link: Umm. Wingull use Gust on Primate 1.
(Primape fainted)
Primate 1: I knew I should have attended Ganondorf’s battle seminar.
Link: Staravia use um…
Text Box: Brave Bird, Return, U-Turn, Arial Ace
Link: Thanks, Text Box. Staravia use Return- on Primate 2.
(Staravia disobeyed orders Staravia, used Brave Bird) (Critical hit)
(Primate died) (Link stole… I mean won 20 Rupees)
Link: That can happen?
Kaze: In the Zelda Universe it can.
Staravia: Idiot, using Return on a Primape when you have STAB Brave Bird when I have a Choice Band? What kind of Trainer gives up an advantage like that?
Link: How do you know this stuff?
Tetra: (falls down tree) Good lob Halley, you’ve learned to keep yourself completive despite being handed by a noob. I mean look at him, he’s got a Wingull as a starter. Two letters UU.
Link: Well excuse me pirate, but I just saved you from those Primape.
Tetra: As far as I saw Halley did most of the work. All your Wingull did was watch.
Kaze: Well, so what If I can’t murder random Pokémon. I still took out one of the Primape.
Tetra: Whatever we’ve finally maxed out your EVs. All we need is Close Combat and we’re good to go.
Kaze: Do you understand a word they’re talking about.
Link: Not a clue.
Tetra: Well thanks for the effort kid; you did try to save me. We promise we won’t raid you village.
Link: That’s comforting.
(Leaves forest)
Aryll: Big Brother, have you convinced the pirate to stay. Grandma says she’ll start kidnapping people if she doesn’t.
Ho-Oh: Damn, stupid Ganondorf, won’t give me my kerosene if I don’t kidnap a Hylian girl. (sees Aryll) young cute innocent, should be an easy target. (Grabs Aryll) (destroys bridge)
Kaze: I told you so
Aryll: Link, Zelda is your…………. (Out of earshot)
Link: Aryll what are you saying? The suspense is killing me. (Runs off cliffhanger)

You're doing very well. You're fitting two different stories together, and very well. Humor is definitely not out of place. One thing I can't understand though, why does one Pokemon seem to switch between a Swablu and a Staravia?

Sorry about that. The thing is that Tetra is a competetive Pokemon battler. After some research I realised that Altaria is a UU Pokemon, one that I didn't think she'd bother training. So I changed it into a Staravia which can evolve into a Staraptor an OU Pokemon. I'll fix it.

Ritogirl(Raichu) this is the best thing I've ever read from you. THis is some good stuff.
More, more!

I'm not sure if this is my best chapter but I hope you like it.
Background music: YouTube - The World Ends With You - Amnesia
Part 5: Sendoff
Tetra: So let’s resolve this cliff hanger Halley, pick the loser up.
Halley: Sure. (Kaze and Halley pick Link up).
(Later at Outset docks)
Tetra: Why do you think that I’m going to take a noob like you along with us? We’re on a tight schedule, plundering, theft, Pokémon tournaments. We have a vacation in Mushroom Kingdom scheduled in May and I won’t miss my chance to get Princess Peach’s autograph.
Gonzo: Tetra I’m not sure Mushroom Kingdom is a good idea, I heard there have been Brawls breaking out there since march this year. Also I heard before that it was a target for an alien Invasion last year.
Tetra: Quiet we’re going to Mushroom Kingdom and getting a Pikachu hat.
Link: Listen, my sister and the only female on this island in this generation, is missing. Shouldn’t that be more important than going to a family theme park?
Quill: Indeed anyway it’s the least you can do. I mean you did get his sister captured in the first place.
Tetra: That bird was after Hylian girls. He would have come here eventually.
Quill: Also Link saved your life in the Forest.
Tetra: No he didn’t. Halley saved me
Quill: umm… Listen Tetra I have embarrassed pictures of you dressing up as a princess. If you do not want this on the walls of the Pirate/ Competitive Battler League, you should take this kid with you.

Tetra: All right. We’ll take him. But how did you get those pictures.
Link: The Toge are jacks of all trades, I was a reporter at that shoot your mother dragged you to.
Link: (supposedly thinking) If I spy on people they will help me.
Quill: You what? Link, I’m surprised at you. This was worse when I found out that my letters were being intercepted by Chancellor Dragmire’s men under the “HERO” act. What’s sad is that only the Hylian Elite voted him into the position in the first place. Flesh won the popular vote by 65% and the Electoral High School consisted of three people. (Damn the Great Sea’s tiny population). I’m sorry but it’s a pretty f***cked up system. Any questions?
Link: Yea two, 1) How to you know my name? 2) Was that rant thinly veiled political satire?
Quill: How did I know your name? it will forever remain a mystery.
Grandma: Hello Quill I’ve seen you met Link. You know my grandson, whom I told you about.
Quill: Alright so I don’t have mysterious sources of information. As for the satire, it will partially affect the plot.
Link: OK, whatever.
Tetra: I guess you blackmailed me into this. But where are the girls being taken to? Some creeps house in the middle of nowhere.
Quill: Actually, there is absolutely no attempt by the kidnapers to conceal the fact that they are evil. The live in a fortress surrounded by eternal night with Possessed Pokémon running the equipment. They torture prisoners there they call it Guantanamo… I mean Forsaken fortress.
Tetra: I remember that place; they used to be owned by the Straw hat Pirates, but then they lost all ounce of toughness after being outsourced by 4Kids. Then they were killed by another group of pirates. It was just as well. It was a quick and merciful death.
Windy: Everything is ruined by the dub.
Tetra: All right you. I don’t want me blamed for your eventual death, to get yourself something to protect you.
Link: An item or a Pokémon.
Tetra: I don’t know who cares. But if it’s a Pokémon, I’d suggest a physical wall. Perhaps Skarmory. Or Blissey if you fear special attacks more.
Kaze: Still don’t have a clue what she’s talking about.
Link: Nope.
(At Grandma’s House)
Grandma: So Aryll got kidnapped. This little Island is going to die off. Unless… Link your young and physically healthy. Go convince the bird to bring Aryll back. Also ask him to bring the rest of the girls here as well. And also maybe a couple of sperm donors. I mean boys. I meant boy, I’m not a radical feminist who believes men should be confined to their reproductive roles. I really am not a Misandrist.
Link: Ok, Grandma, do you have anything I can use for a shield.
Grandma: From my youth I have my starter Pokémon. Larvitar I never named him but you can. I haven’t let him out in 55 years. He has quite an attitude.
Kaze: Do you want to give a nickname to Larvitar?
Link: Why are you asking that question?
Kaze: I don’t know, maybe the Test box I busy.
Link: Ok then, umm… Earnest.
Earnest: A very masculine name, you’re a very clever young lad.
LinK: I’m a girl, you know.
Earnest: Than it is too clever, who suggested it to you?
Link: What are you talking about?
Earnest: A women can’t come up with such a good name.
Link: Is he the reason you hate men or are you the reason he hates women?
Grandma: Never mind that. Go save your sister.
(at the ship)
Tetra: A basic Pokémon. Is this the best you can get?
Link: Shut up it’s not like everyone has the time to train a team of level 100 Ubers.
Tetra: I don’t use Ubers. I’m an OU trainer.
Link: Whatever, I bought some Pokémon food though Kaze; seem to be addicted to these pears.
Kaze: All the fruity goodness. It almost makes me want to advertise cereal.
Tetra: It’s time to go. Let’s watch a sappy cut scene and get out of here.
Orca: Link, I forgive you for almost killing me, I really shouldn’t have asked birds to attack me.
Sturgeon: Wait Link you forgot your Navidex, Oh well screw it.
Grandma: Go out into the world Link. Be the granddaughter who doesn’t follow traditional gender roles. Save your sister save the….
Kaze: Sorry we can’t hear you old lady. That would be infringing on copyright.

Just like always, you're mixing two stories together very well and including brilliant humor, especially for its type. It seems in this last one you focused mostly on the storyline. I'd advise on maybe using just a tiny bit more humor to keep an even balance to satisfy both those who like the humor and those who want to hear the storyline. Other than that you're doing a great job with this.

Still funny and still going. Can't wait to see the next one. Keep it up. =)

This is cool, if long in parts. I would love this, as I love both the things that it parodys. =D

Part 6: Pirates of the Great Sea
Background Music of the Chapter:YouTube - Pirates of the Caribbean [Main Theme] on guitar
Tetra: So, you just going to sit here like a sad-sap or are you going to my by slave.
Link: What no one said anything about slavery?
Kaze: It’s against amendment 12 of the great Sea Constiution to enslave another.
Tetra: How do you know that bird brain?
Kaze: I learned law from a bunch of scavenging, parasitic Honchkrow. They were experts in the legal field.
Tetra: Well we’re pirates we don’t have to follow any legal code. The only Law we follow is the Hyrule New Testament. By the way it’s sacrilegious to be called Link in our culture. A punishment you must be the indentured servant of our Omega, Niko. And to avoid getting in trouble we’re classifying you as an indentured servant.
Link: But it’s illogical to punish someone for their name, and my name isn’t really Link it’s
Tetra: Quit complaining or I’ll kick your nuts. I know you wouldn’t want me to crack your Deku Nut stash.
Kaze: How many bad puns are going to come out of male genitalia?
Link: I’m a vegetarian; I need Deku nuts for my protein. Fine, I’ll be Niko’s slave/"indentured servant”.
(downstairs)
Niko: So, you have come here a weakling a puny pathetic, creature armed with a mutated seagull. I will take you from a boy into a man.
Link: I’m a girl you know.
Niko: It doesn’t matter. I’ll take you from a girl and make you a man.
Earnest: Oh, yeah I like the way this guy thinks.
Link: If you’re so masculine why do you take orders from a preteen girl?
Niko: Tetra’s hardcore man. I took care of her femininity a long time ago. I might have turned her gay too. But regardless, she’s a tough a pirate as her mother.
Kaze: Tetra, described you as an Omega, that term means you’re the weakest in the crew.
Niko: Oh, yeah Tetra just hates me. I asked her out once, and she was upset I wouldn’t kill a Fearow to get some feathers. I mean being a pirate doesn’t mean you can’t care about the rights of animals.
Link: So what do I have to do?
Niko: The first exercise is so brutal, it took Tetra a whole year to complete it.
Kaze: Ok what is it.
Niko: First you must step on this overly sized switch. (steps). Then you have to jump on platforms (jumps). Then you have to swing from rope to rope until you reach the other side (demonstrates). Then you take the bag on the other side to become an official member of our crew.
Link: I have an idea.
Earnest: What is it how to put your makeup on right?
Link: You know Earnest; you’re just a sexist piece of deadweight. I’m going to make you fulfill half your purpose.(tries to lift)
Link: Many you’re heavy.
Earnest: 72.8 kilos. Try lifting that.
Link: Ash cans do it in the anime.
Earnest: The anime is a cartoon.
Link: And this isn’t? Anyway no point in fighting physics. I’ll have to force you to move. Earnest return. (goes into ball)(points ball at switch) Earnest go. F*** yourself.
(reappears)
Kaze: Doesn’t this qualify as cheating.
Link: Pirates cheat, ninjas cheat. I’m really just proving I can be either. (Does challenge)
Niko: Unbelievable, Tetra made it across these things thirty times without realizing that you have to cheat to qualify. You my son/daughter are unethical. Welcome to the Triumph Forks Crew.
Link: Where’d you get a lame name like that?
Niko: The magic fish said it would give us ultimate power.
Link: Just shows how much you can trust magic fish. (Opens chest YouTube - Zelda: Twilight Princess Music - Treasure Chest and Item)
Text Box: You got a loot bag. Now you can steal things from unexpecting Pokémon.
Link: So the challenge didn't seem to difficult, why was it neccesary to cheat?
Niko: Well becuase we cheated also. Right before the chest is a trapdoor that will open unless there is something on the switch. So remember kids. Cheating is OK if you know someone elses is also cheating.
Earnest: Or if you're going out with a women.
Link: That's it! You are going into this ball forever. Or until there is a defecit of comedy.
Tetra: (Yelling) Link! Get up here before Niko gives you… (sees bag) our treasure. Niko I told you don’t give our treasure to temps.
Niko: Well the last temp became a crew member. Right Mako?
Tetra: And look how that turned out. He’s retarded. He keeps trying to read our books up-side down.
Mako: Hey Tetra, are we going to say hi to the people in the pretty fortress.
Kaze: Wait a second we’re already at Forsaken Fortress. According to the map a stole, that’s all the way across the Great Sea. How did we get there in less than 10 minutes?
Tetra: Don’t overanalyze this. Here Link you must have worked up a sweat from all that swinging around. (hands Link a Tissue) (Link Passes out)
Kaze: What did you do to him? (Tetra crams Kaze in Link’s hat)(Puts Link in a Barrel)
Tetra: Don’t worry we do this all the time, this is how we get our kicks. It’s too dangerous to approach the Fortress so we’ll just launch you right up to where you’re sister is. Is that OK?
Link: No, this can’t possibly be safer than just going to shore. Surely you have a cannon?
Tetra: Yes but bombs are expensive in the Middle Ages. We have to steal them just to get our current stock. Anyway, brace yourself, you have to the count of three.
Senza: Ichi, ni, Son
(Link flies to the wall hits it but survives, however Kaze and her hat fly to the top of the Forsaken Fortress).
Link: (sees guards) Well, I guess being a pirate didn’t work out. Guess I’m going to have to be a ninja.

This one really worked out well fits with the story perfectly as far as I can remember.

Since I can't really think of much to summarize the whole story anymore, I guess I'll just start breaking up the story and give commentary on individual parts.

Originally Posted by Raichu

Part 6: Pirates of the Great Sea
Background Music of the Chapter:YouTube - Pirates of the Caribbean [Main Theme] on guitar
Tetra: So, you just going to sit here like a sad-sap or are you going to my by slave.
Link: What no one said anything about slavery?
Kaze: It’s against amendment 12 of the great Sea Constiution to enslave another.
Tetra: How do you know that bird brain?
Kaze: I learned law from a bunch of scavenging, parasitic Honchkrow. They were experts in the legal field.
Tetra: Well we’re pirates we don’t have to follow any legal code. The only Law we follow is the Hyrule New Testament. By the way it’s sacrilegious to be called Link in our culture. A punishment you must be the indentured servant of our Omega, Niko. And to avoid getting in trouble we’re classifying you as an indentured servant.
Link: But it’s illogical to punish someone for their name, and my name isn’t really Link it’s
Tetra: Quit complaining or I’ll kick your nuts. I know you wouldn’t want me to crack your Deku Nut stash.
Kaze: How many bad puns are going to come out of male genitalia?
Link: I’m a vegetarian; I need Deku nuts for my protein. Fine, I’ll be Niko’s slave/"indentured servant”.
(downstairs)

I think you're hanging on the servant/slave concept a little too much here, I started to lose just a little bit of interest, but it's not a horrible problem.

Niko: So, you have come here a weakling a puny pathetic, creature armed with a mutated seagull. I will take you from a boy into a man.
Link: I’m a girl you know.
Niko: It doesn’t matter. I’ll take you from a girl and make you a man.
Earnest: Oh, yeah I like the way this guy thinks.
Link: If you’re so masculine why do you take orders from a preteen girl?
Niko: Tetra’s hardcore man. I took care of her femininity a long time ago. I might have turned her gay too. But regardless, she’s a tough a pirate as her mother.
Kaze: Tetra, described you as an Omega, that term means you’re the weakest in the crew.
Niko: Oh, yeah Tetra just hates me. I asked her out once, and she was upset I wouldn’t kill a Fearow to get some feathers. I mean being a pirate doesn’t mean you can’t care about the rights of animals.

I personally like how you drew attention to this part of the story. It uses critical humor against the original story very well.

Link: So what do I have to do?
Niko: The first exercise is so brutal, it took Tetra a whole year to complete it.
Kaze: Ok what is it.
Niko: First you must step on this overly sized switch. (steps). Then you have to jump on platforms (jumps). Then you have to swing from rope to rope until you reach the other side (demonstrates). Then you take the bag on the other side to become an official member of our crew.

In my opinion, this part lacks a bit of humor, if that is the kind of story you're going for.

Link: I have an idea.
Earnest: What is it how to put your makeup on right?
Link: You know Earnest; you’re just a sexist piece of deadweight. I’m going to make you fulfill half your purpose.(tries to lift)
Link: Many you’re heavy.
Earnest: 72.8 kilos. Try lifting that.
Link: Ash cans do it in the anime.
Earnest: The anime is a cartoon.
Link: And this isn’t? Anyway no point in fighting physics. I’ll have to force you to move. Earnest return. (goes into ball)(points ball at switch) Earnest go. F*** yourself.

I'm not sure about other people's preferences, but character to character conflict always keeps me reading.

(reappears)
Kaze: Doesn’t this qualify as cheating.
Link: Pirates cheat, ninjas cheat. I’m really just proving I can be either. (Does challenge)
Niko: Unbelievable, Tetra made it across these things thirty times without realizing that you have to cheat to qualify. You my son/daughter are unethical. Welcome to the Triumph Forks Crew.

I always appreciate it when someone emphasizes the difficulty of something this way, saying it's incredibly difficult, when it is. I personally don't think that the challenge was very difficult in the game, but I'm guessing you're making it more difficult (in theory) for the story?

Link: Where’d you get a lame name like that?
Niko: The magic fish said it would give us ultimate power.
Link: Just shows how much you can trust magic fish. (Opens chest YouTube - Zelda: Twilight Princess Music - Treasure Chest and Item)
Text Box: You got a loot bag. Now you can steal things from unexpecting Pokémon.

Two very good points illustrated by critical humor.

Tetra: Get up here before Niko gives you… (sees bag) our treasure. Niko I told you don’t give our treasure to temps.
Niko: Well the last temp became a crew member. Right Mako?
Tetra: And look how that turned out. He’s retarded. He keeps trying to read our books up-side down.

I personally didn't notice anything about him, but I'm guessing it's there to add to the story.

Mako: Hey Tetra, are we going to say hi to the people in the pretty fortress.
Kaze: Wait a second we’re already at Forsaken Fortress. According to the map a stole, that’s all the way across the Great Sea. How did we get there in less than 10 minutes?

Again, another good point illustrated by critical humor.

Tetra: Don’t overanalyze this. Here Link you must have worked up a sweat from all that swinging around. (hands Link a Tissue) (Link Passes out)
Kaze: What did you do to him? (Tetra crams Kaze in Link’s hat)(Puts Link in a Barrel)
Tetra: Don’t worry we do this all the time, this is how we get our kicks. It’s too dangerous to approach the Fortress so we’ll just launch you right up to where you’re sister is. Is that OK?

More critical humor, and still very brilliantly illustrated.

Link: No, this can’t possibly be safer than just going to shore. Surely you have a cannon?
Tetra: Yes but bombs are expensive in the Middle Ages. We have to steal them just to get our current stock. Anyway, brace yourself, you have to the count of three.
Senza: Ichi, ni, Son
(Link flies to the wall hits it but survives, however Kaze and her hat fly to the top of the Forsaken Fortress).
Link: (sees guards) Well, I guess being a pirate didn’t work out. Guess I’m going to have to be a ninja.

I like the last line here. In addition to adding humor, it sets the story up for the next chapter and wraps up this one.