[Act][Tra] A Story, that of once was...(T)

This is my first fan-fiction, just keep that in mind. But please, be completely honest and write a review on my story. Obviously, the story will progress chapter-by-chapter and you should expect each chapter to come at least once a week, but most likely more and quicker than that. If you enjoy it, please PLEASE tell me because some motivation would be awesome.

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A story, that of once was...
Chapter One

“Believe…I will believe I can surpass the ordinary. I will rely on my friends and show the entire world I was meant to do something great. I will prove you wrong. No matter the stakes, I know I believe…I know where true power comes from.”

“Lyke! Wake up! You’re working! Frey is going to catch you slacking off again!” Allysis shouted into the next room.

The damp figure slumped in the corner of a large crimson barn; he bobbed up and down and let out a slight groan after being woken up prematurely. The stature sat up and brushed his hands through his luminescent golden hair. He slightly opened his eyes, to reveal his sharp hazel iris.

“Heh. Looks like I took another snooze…” Lyke stated tiredly.

“Yes, you sure did. Why are you so incompetent Lyke? You’re nothing like your parents.” Allysis responded impatiently.

Allysis was a young sixteen year old girl, native to the madria province, as is Lyke. She has been Lyke’s friend since childhood and always has to remind him to stop neglecting his work at the local ranch. She is considered the brightest out of everyone in her village, which isn’t saying very much considering the laziness of the people.

“HEY! I told you never to compare me to my parents!” Lyke blurted, obviously woken up.

“I wouldn’t have to if you just did your work!” Allysis sassily rebutted.

Frey entered the portion of the barn Lyke and Allysis were talking in, incognito.

“WHAT ARE YOU GUYS DOING? AND WHY AREN’T YOU IN UNIFORM?” Frey screeched.

Lyke’s eyes went wide with fear, and Allysis stepped in, responding without a moments notice.

“We just finished cleaning the horses’ pen, we were just so tired...and we thought it would be alright if we shed our dirty clothes and took a short break. But now, as you see, we were just about to resume our duties. Good day, sir.” Allysis stated, walking out of the barn and motioning for Lyke to follow.

Stepping just outside the building, Lyke and Allysis began walking towards the designated storage building.

“Uhh…I was sure he was gonna catch me this time…thanks a lot Allysis! You sure saved me a whole heap of trouble.” Lyke placed his arms behind his head and grinned.

“You’re just lucky I was there to bail you out…you know one day I won’t be there when you need a way out. You’re going to have to get yourself around these situations, or you could just do your job like everyone else.” Allysis glared at Lyke’s posture.

“Aww…you just don’t know. Frey has always been out for my head. No matter what I’d do that guy would just think of some stupid reason to fire me. And I can handle myself without ya, thank you very much!” Lyke said smugly.

The friends moved onto the shed that held all the garb for the field hands. The outfits were very petty, and looked like several different cloths have just been sown together. They quite resembled what other people in town wore, but were obviously much cheaper. Hey, at least they still held the town’s simplistic symbol on the pant leg, the goats’ horn. The two changed into these outfits and traveled back to the fields to continue their work, or in Lyke’s case, his nap.

- - - - -

After an extensive day of work, nighttime descended upon the town. Lyke returned home, where Allysis had stayed at the field to complete her tasks. Lyke, who was the same age as Allysis, despised knowing that he was just considered as the Mayor’s son, and just wished that he was born into a normal family of the village. It seemed that everyone had set high expectations for him at birth, after a short while of trying to live up to it, he learned to live completely oblivious to his father’s prime example. However, no matter how much he’d like not to be, Lyke was still apart of his family, and received the Royal Family’s Crest laid upon his left hand. Honestly, he’d rather not have the honor.

Upon returning to his home, Lyke was quickly confronted by his father.

“So…how did work go over today?” His father asked staring into Lyke’s eyes.

“Uhh…it was well…errrg…great. I got a lot of work done today, Frey only yelled at me once.” Lyke let out a slight chuckle upon the last words.

“So, you did nothing bad at work? Nothing at all?” His father’s eyes, not moving an inch.

“Nothing, nothing at all. I was a good boy today."Lyke said, trying not to crack under the pressure of lying to his perfect dad.

“That’s peculiar…you see, I received a letter from Frey stating that you have been sleeping during work, and on the rare occasion you’re actually awake, you get nothing done. You hear me? He has fired you.”

Lyke was astonished. He couldn’t accept the fact that he was actually correct in his inkling that Frey had been itching to fire him.

“But dad, it’s not my fault! Fray is just-“ Lyke was interrupted.

“Fray was nothing, Lyke, and neither are you. You are nothing, and you will be nothing! Don’t you take after me and your mother in any way?! You are just so useless, not good for anything!”

Lyke stood there, in a shocked state, returning the stare into his father’s eyes.

“If that is truly what you feel about me, then I will be taking my leave…” Lyke’s body said, but his mind was still pondering his dad’s words.

Lyke turned around slowly, and a gentle tear rolled down his face. He took off running to the nearby forest, ignoring everyone’s yelps as he pushed through the crowd to get away. Running out of breath, the distressed boy sat upon a large oak tree and began banging the back of his head against the cold bark.

“I should have seen this coming…how stupid am I…am I truly what he called me? Am I truly useless? Yes…I suppose I am. Allysis and Father have been telling me this all along, and I haven’t realized it until now. I cannot believe how slow I am…”

Lyke’s eyes swelled and tears began waterfalling against his lush skin. Leaves rustled along side him, and suddenly his tears stopped falling. He looked around, with a confused look about him, until something caught his eye.

“Wh…What is…happening?”

A sudden burst of energy released from the sky, and a gale of wind picked up, ruffling Lyke’s clothes and swaying his hair. Lyke stood up, and his pupils dialated wildly. Suddenly, a crushing force threw Lyke backwards, crashing into the large oak tree behind him, breaking it. Blood ran all across his back and he, closed his eyes, and cringed in pain. He reopened them, and the entire scene was different than it was once before. The cold darkness of night had been lifted from the area, and an eerie mid-darkness set in around him, and everywhere else.

Lyke stood, shaking, and gazed upon his new environment. Small black pixels were releasing themselves in the air, and he felt...different. Lyke quickly examined himself, and estimated the amount of damaged had occurred on his back. Oddly, there was near to no cut. This wasn’t the only anomalous thing about Lyke. His left hand was glowing wildly, with a golden light.

“My hand…why…why is it glowing? What is happening? Is this a joke? Am I dreaming? It seems too real to be just a dream…but, if not a dream, then what else?” Lyke thought deeply.

The harsh settings around him began to settle down, and he lay down on the hard trunk of the fallen tree and began…thinking.

“What is going to happen? What will happen to me? Father? Mother? Allysis?”

Lyke stopped thinking for just a moment, and examined his hand.

“And what of this? What does this all mean?”

Lyke weakly stood, and clinched his fist. Without warning, he darted across the field toward town, blocking everything out of his mind except for the menacing questions that become greater in number by the moment. He reached town and stopped, abruptly, in the town square.

“…” Lyke was left speechless upon gazing upon the people in the town. Nobody was moving, nobody. They all had smiles on their faces, and looked like none of this had fazed them. They were all lying on the ground, with the black pixels centralizing on their bodies. Lyke ran person to person, and found the same had happened to them. He stood for a moment, and resumed running in the direction of the field he formally had worked at.

“I knew it…” Lyke said, scarcely, as he saw Allysis in the same state the rest of the people had been in. He ran to her, and lifted her body off the floor, combing the pixels off of her. She was cold. He kissed her icy cheek and placed her body back onto the floor of the field.

Lyke ran back to the town square, except this time something was different about him. It was in his face. He looked like he had a sense of purpose, a mission.

He dashed to his home and found his father, but he wasn’t like the rest. He was moving…and so was something else around him.

“Urgh…What have you done to this town, foul beast?!” Lyke’s dad yelled!

The hefty figure was that of, simply, a beast. It flailed around and round, looking anxious to pounce upon his father. It was a long, black; build with a flat face and a lanky structure. It let out short frequent shrieks, possibly trying to speak…or maybe just shrieking. Lyke watched, keeping his distance, and waited for something to happen.

“Come at me then, twili..." Lyke’s father said, shivering.

Just then, the being pounced upon the human, and began biting and punching the man, and pushing him to the floor. Father's hand flailed out, and Lyke saw something…familiar.

“His hand…his hand is just like mine.” Lyke thought as he looked at his own palm. “They’re both glowing…is that why we can move? Is that why this is happening?”

Suddenly, Lyke’s father’s hand-glow went out, the pixels swarmed his body just like all before him, and his body formed the same cold trance as everyone else.

“…You're dead." Lyke’s voice changed dramatically and he had a different presence about him. Everything about him seemed to change. It's like...he's a different person.

Key:
Italizied - Sarcasm / Important Tidbit of information
Bolded - Character yelling / Very important piece of information

What I liked: I like how the main character feels, and how good you constructed his attitude.
What I didn't like: Everything was alright.
You should keep up the good work!! Its a really nice story, and cant wait till you post the next chapter!

thanks a lot diaz you're a good buddy

I know it's only been one day since the last chapter...but I have another one for you! This is good news for people who like the story, and bad news for people who don't like it, because this topic is just about to be bumped to the top!

Chapter Two
“Once you allow yourself a certain freedom; to set yourself apart from others, then you will truly become which that could save the world.”

“You’re dead…” Lyke slowly approached the “twili” and planted his feet firm in front of it. Lyke was not the same. He suddenly had a sense of presence, like he was completely there. His hand was radiating wildly, and a stunning golden aura had encompassed his body.

“You will pay for what you have done.” Lyke stated, breaking the moment of silence between them. “YOU WILL DIE!” Lyke bent down to the floor, and threw his head towards the ground. He let out a chilling noise that shook even the floor below the two. Lyke repositioned his head straight-forward, and opened his unnerving eyes. They had changed to a beautiful icy blue color, and his aura had crumbled the entire area around him. The town seemed not to be in that sub-darkness state, a brilliant light had appeared, Lyke. The daunting pixels had seemed to disappear as well.

Lyke readied himself for an attack, but instead of pouncing forward, his body just seemed to fade away from the town, to return behind the grand beast.

“Are you…ready?” Lyke threw his gallant fist towards the back of the head of his opponent. The creature flew across the entire town, to dismount along a wall of a local home. Lyke preformed his same trick of appearing, even quicker than before. Lyke shoved his right arm straight into the twili’s forehead, creating a large indention within its skull.

“Eheeeee!” The beast shrieked upon the last blow.

Lyke removed his arm from the being, and took a swift kick across his body, thus sending the monster across the field and into rugged stone. Lyke jumped atop of a nearby building and gripped his left arm with his right palm.

“Now, it is time for you to pay…for all of this.” Lyke’s aura seemed to flail around randomly until that moment. Now the aura had a place to travel, Lyke’s left hand. The golden atmosphere centralized around his hand and began to slightly cut his forearm with its rage. “Take this!” Lyke plunged his arm forward, and released the great amount of energy towards the stone. The golden force ripped through the boulder and the organism alike. The creature let out one last shriek as it faded away into oblivion.

- - - - -

Lyke’s otherworldly appearance seemed to subside, and he fell the distance from up top of the edifice, to the ground beneath it. He instantly fell into a deep sleep, probably due to the stress and trauma of everything that just happened. Everyone in town awoke from their sleep, and all began to wonder why they were on the floor, and more importantly, what happened to their ruined town. Allysis quickly regained focus, and slowly traveled to the town, which had been reduced to rubble by Lyke’s last attack.

“Do any of you know what happened? I just woke up in the ranch, and I found all of this.” Allysis questioned everyone in town, receiving the same answer between them all; they had just awakened also. Allysis scampered around the village, until coming across Lyke, still lying on the floor, barely alive.

“Lyke! Lyke what happened to you? Who hurt you?” Allysis shook Lyke rapidly, hoping to wake him from his slumber.

“…Al…Allysis?” Lyke began to awaken, ever-so-slightly. His body appeared to be famished, and he looked like a mess. Cuts and scars were all over his arm, and Allysis picked him up, in attempt to bring him to his father.

Allysis struggled to carry Lyke back to his home, and took frequent breaks along the way to further question people about what had happened. She tried her best to comfort Lyke as best as she could, as he kept yelping in pain. Eventually, Allysis approached Lyke’s home and found his mother cradling his father.

“…Wh…Why did this happen?” Lyke’s mom stumbled through these words, sobbing after each syllable.

Allysis’ eyes went wide when she had figured out what occurred; Lyke’s father had died. Lyke’s mom turned to Allysis and spotted Lyke in her arms.

“…” Lyke’s mom’s face went pale, and tears began streaming down her face, one-by-one. “Him…too. Both of them…are gone.”

Lyke mustered the strength to move around a bit, attempting to show his mother that he had not yet died. Her face brightened slightly, and she took Lyke into her arms.

“I’m so glad you’re alright. But I can’t say the same for your fath-“ Lyke passed out completely before he could hear her last words, but he already knew the fate of his diseased dad.

- - - - -

The people soon regained proper thought, and began to reconstruct some important buildings. Several tents were sent around the area, some designated to be food storages, clothing departments, and hospitals. Only after a short while after Lyke was returned to his mother, she gave him to one of these tents for treatment of the wounds he had received. As you can imagine, many people checked into these hospitals for injuries during the attack, but Lyke was still given a bed. A few long weeks passed before Lyke finally regained consciousness, where as he could answer the pending questions the people had for him.

“Lyke? Yes! You’re finally awake! It’s so typical of you to sleep while we’re all worried about you!” Allysis said, half mocking him and half in concern.

“…How’s my mother?” Lyke asked.

“She’s been alright, but honestly, she’s gone downhill since your father died.” Allysis responded with a hint of sadness in her voice.

Lyke’s mother has been fighting off a deadly disease since her birth. Back before the attack, she appeared as though she would be okay, maybe even perfectly normal. It seems now she has resumed her sickness.

“That’s just what I need right now…” Lyke said sarcastically.

“I’ve been meaning to ask you, Lyke…what did happen that night?” Allysis questioned.

“What makes you think I know anything? I’m just a lazy bum that can’t do anything right. Why in the world would I know?” Lyke asked, now sitting up.

“I thought it was kind of odd that you and your father were the only ones with actual wounds from the incident. Because I cannot ask your father, I decided to ask you. So, spill.” Allysis stated.

Lyke groaned. “He was attacked, by some…thing. I saw him die, and I remember feeling…strange. The last thing I remember was you waking me up near that building.” Lyke pointed to the building stated.

“You can’t remember anything else?” Allysis responded, “Nothing?”

“No…I can’t remember anything.”

awsome title man...love it...

yeah, I like the title too. I spent like 1/2 an hour looking at it, and deciding whether or not it was grammatically correct. Couldn't decide, so I just went with it.

Nice chapter! I like it!
I just thought it will be a bit longer. But thats alright.
Cant wait till to read what happens next!

lol, sorry. I typed it in microsoft word, and there it looked much longer than it did here. XD and thanks, the next chapter is in the works

His dad has a disease?
What I liked: It has an interesting storyline
What I didn't like: Some capitalization issues ;P
General comments: Pretty good so far, hope to see more soon!