(Sf/Act/) Lylat Wars [T]

This is the first part of my very first fanfiction. It's basically just a retelling of the original Star Fox, but it will have various things from Star Fox 2 and Star Fox 64 in it as well. It should end up being rather lengthy when it's completed, and it should be very good. Just tell me what you think about it so far and how I could improve. I already know that I need to work on the things said by the characters, which is what I'll focus a bit more on in the next chapter. Oh, and the launch sequence thing is from a Star Fox remix, entitled "Godspeed." You can find it at OCRemic.org.

Chapter 1: The Test

Today was the day that he had been waiting for. Not just him, but his opponent as well. No more trying to outdo each other on tests, which they they always made perfect scores on. No more competing for the high scores on the simulators, which they both caused to freeze up. Now they were finally able to put their rivalry to an end in a one-on-one dogfight, or make it even more intense. Everybody in the Cornerian Academy knew about their rivalry, even the instructors. In fact, that may have been why they were now being put up against each other. Even if the selection machine had found better matches than they were, the instructors still would have put them up against each other. Either way, the two were finally going to have a chance to really fight each other, to show their true skill.

"Today's the day you die, McCloud!" Called Wolf as he climbed into the cockpit of the standard-issue Cornerian fighter that the Academy students flew when they were actually allowed to fly. "The Cornerian Academy isn't made of money!" is what the students were always told, so they had to use the fighters used by the Cornerian Army at least ten years ago.

"You keep telling yourself that when I'm on your tail, Wolf!" Fox had to shout over the noise caused by the crew working to fuel up the fighters and check the systems to make sure they were ready for flight. These old ships were rather unreliable at times, and nobody wanted anything other than the two rivals' skill to determine the outcome of this battle.

Once the ships were fueled and ready for flight, the systems preperation began. Two voices started coming out of the speakers, loud enough to be audible even inside the airtight cockpits of the Academy fighters. One was that of a man, and the other distinctly belonged to a woman.

"Internal power to enable," boomed the man's voice. "Enabled," said the woman's voice with almost no tone to it.

"External power to disable." "Disabled."

"Primary weapons to enable." "Enabled."

"Secondary weapons to enable and prime." "Primed."

"Navigation systems to enable." "Enabled."

"Life support to enable." "Enabled."

"Deflector shields to enable and prime." "Primed."

"Targeting systems to enable." "Enabled."

"Alpha interface to enable." "Enabled."

"Beta interface to prime." "Primed."

"Twin lasers to enable." "Enabled."

"Nova bombs to disable." "Disabled."

"All wing systems prime." "Primed."

"All systems go," the man's voice finally called out. "At launch, all systems are go. Fighters primed, and ready."

The voices then stopped, and the engines of the fighters started running. They slowly started to accelerate the two ships, their pilots keeping eye contact. Losing sight of their enemy could cost them their lives in this, what was supposed to only be one of the school's tests. The ships started going faster and faster, flying down the long hallway meant to allow the ships to get up to flight speed. The pilots of the ship then looked forward at the small point of light at the end of the tunnel that was getting larger at a steady rate.

The ships flew out the opening of the Academy at an incredible speed. Although the ships themselves were at least twenty meters long and seemed to be massive when seen up close, they were miniscule when compared to the rest of the Academy. In fact, they were miniscule when compared with just about any building on Corneria. Ever since the mining of asteroids had started nearly two centuries ago, building materials were no longer a problem when constructing anything.

Fox was calmly sitting at the controls of his ship, waiting for the hologram with the instructor's face to pop up and tell him where the testing area was. That's all this was to the teachers at the Cornerian Academy. But to Fox and Wolf, this was a matter of life and death. Fox hadn't done anything to make Wolf hate him so much, except being gifted with his father's piloting skills. That's why Fox, who was only seventeen at the time, had been put ahead by three years in the Academy with students who were mostly in their twenties.

Wolf had been eighteen at the time, an exceptional student who didn't end up being held back like many other students, and was extremely frustrated with the Academy's choice. He had been at the Academy for at least two years, working his tail off to be the best in the class, and then one day they sent a pup in just because of "natural talent." This made some people jealous of him, made some people like him, and others just didn't even care. But Wolf made it his duty to outdo Fox at anything and everything.

Just then, the instructor's message came up. "You are to fly a kilometer north-east from your current location, and assume your positions. When I give the signal, the two of you will begin. Remember that you are not trying to kill each other. If one of you has had enough, then simply say so and then the other pilot is to back off. Both of you will then return to the Academy, where your scores will be given to you. Best of luck to the both of you."

Once they had reached the testing area, Fox flew half a quarter of a kilometer to the east, and Wolf to the west. In their headsets, they heard the instructor's voice. "You two may begin!" He didn't realize that he was wasting his breath. Ever since Fox and Wolf had gotten into their ships, the test had begun.

The two ships then did a U-turn and leveled out so that now they were flying straight at each other. "This is it, McCloud! Let's see what you've got!"

Alright, so now I will start the second chapter of my story. If it's not all too great, just deal with it. Like I've said, this is the first fanfic I've ever worked on and I'm just getting the hang of things.

Chapter 2: What Should Have Been the End

It was a bright and sunny day, very typical on Corneria. The birds were singing, bugs were chirping, and everything else said that it was a peaceful day. The only things that said otherwise were the two Cornerian fighters flying toward each other at high speed.

Fox was trying to keep the crosshairs steady on Wolf's ship. If he could get a lock on him, then he'd be able to track him after he flew by. Wolf knew what Fox was doing, so he was doing his best to keep Fox from getting a fix on him. "Is that all you've got, McCloud? Maybe you should go back to the first year class, where you belong!" Fox didn't let Wolf's insults get to him. Wolf was an expert at psychological warfare during a dogfight. By distracting his enemy, he'd be able to easily get the upper hand.

The two ships were getting closer to each other. Fifty meters. Forty meters. Thirty meters. Twenty-five meters. Fox swerved his ship to the right to avoid hitting Wolf. He quickly followed with a sharp turn to the left so that he could get to where he could see Wolf's ship. Wolf kept speeding in a straight line, and performed a U-turn to fly back toward Fox. That was a mistake, Fox thought to himself. He was referring to, of course, the fact that doing such a maneuver is only meant for disengaging the enemy because of how much your ship's speed is reduced. Fox carefully followed Wolf's ship to get a lock, but he was blinded by a bright light.

"Damn, he's in front of the sun!" Fox shouted to himself.

"What's the matter? Too bright for you?" Wolf pulled the trigger, and a stream of lasers flew at Fox and his ship. Fox, having inherited his father's ability of controlling a barrel roll at high speeds, quickly spun his ship. He'd heard the instructors say that this had the potential to deflect laser fire, but there was still the major deadly flaw to doing this sort of thing.

"Hah, you think that'll stop me? As soon as you come out of that roll, you won't know where I am!" Wolf said into his headset. Taking advantage of the moment, he slammed forward the throttle control to try and get behind Fox.

"He's right," Fox said to himself. "I'm spinning too fast for the sensors to keep up, and any moment-" Fox was interrupted by a small blip from the ship's console, indicating that he'd lost his target. "Damn, better level out and find him again."

"Hey, Fox! Look behind you!" Fox jerked around in his seat to try and see back behind him, and he saw the last thing he'd wanted to see. Wolf was now right on his tail, and he didn't intend to get off.

Fox quickly hit the throttle to speed up his ship, and Wolf did the same. "You can't outrun me, Fox!"

"Who said I was trying to outrun you, Wolf?" Fox said into his headset. He'd never brought his hand off of the throttle, and at this moment he brought it back as far it'd go right as he moved the control stick forward to lower the craft. As he looked up through the top of the cockpit's canopy, he saw Wolf's ship fly overhead.

"What, where'd he go?" Wolf shouted. He swung his head left and right to try and see where Fox had gone, but all he could see was the green plains of Corneria. "Hey, Wolf! miss me?" Wolf heard through his headset. He then realized how simple of a maneuver he had fallen for. Fox had accelerated to appear as if he were fleeing, which forced Wolf to chase after him. Because of how fast he was going, Wolf had been unable to see Fox decelerate and drop below him.

"You're mine now, Wolf!" Fox pulled the trigger, and sent a hailstorm of lasers flying towards Wolf. Wolf wasn't near as good as Fox with a barrel roll, so all he could do was swerve to the side and hope to take as few hits as possible. But it didn't do him any good. As he looked out the side of his ship, he could see the lasers collide with the fuselage. Thinking quickly, he boosted again to get out of this rain of fire.

"I underestimated you, Fox! But you're not going to survive this!" Wolf then swerved to the right, flew straight for a few seconds, and did a tight turn to be facing Fox again. "This is where we settle things, McCloud!"

"Fine by me, Wolf!" replied Fox. This was it. They were going to fly straight at each other, sending a barrage of lasers at each other. Only one of them would survive, if they were lucky. This was often seen as an act of desperation, an attempt to take your opponent down with you. If Wolf couldn't win, then neither could Fox. It was as simple as that.

The two ships flew towards each other, somewhere between their maximum and minimum speeds. Fox and Wolf both wanted to fire as many shots as possible to gaurantee their victory. They quickly rotated their ships, not to deflect shots but to try and avoid them, as they flew closer to each other. Fox saw the green bursts of light flying towards him, so close that he would have been able to hear the air around them interacting with the immense heat caused by the laser, had he not been in such a noisy ship.

And then, the shots started to hit. Not just Fox's ship, but Wolf's too. This didn't deter either pilot. They were not going to let anything stop them from seeing their adversary fall out of the sky and bail from their ship. The ships got closer and closer, swerved, and flew right by each other. At that split second, Fox and Wolf made eye contact. That split second seemed to last for minutes to each of them, and then it ended just as quickly as it had started.

They kept flying away from each other to get at good range, and did such tight turns that had it not been for the inertial compensators, both of them may have ended up turning into a furry jelly with bits of bone in it. Again, both pilots got a lock on their opponent and started rolling their ship. When they were within weapons range, they opened fire upon each other. Bright bolts of light streamed from their ships, and collided against the hull of the opposing ship.

Blue sparks flew from the controls. As he looked down at them, he realized that he had been beaten. But the shots kept coming. Maybe his opponent didn't know that he had been finished, but all he knew was that he had to bail. He reached down beside his seat and grabbed the handle that would jettison the entire cockpit section of the ship. He pulled hard, and the handle came undone like it was supposed to. However, the cockpit remained attached to the ship. He looked at one of the displays, which read "Systems Error" in flashing red letters. "NO! NOT NOW! DON'T FAIL ON ME NOW!" He yelled out, and he started beating on the canopy of the ship. What good this would do, he didn't know, but it was better than watching the ground come up to meet him.

Fox looked out the canopy of his ship, down at the ground. Realizing that Wolf should have bailed by now, and would have, he quickly flipped the switch that would put him through to the Academy. "This is Fox McCloud, I have shot down Wolf. He has not bailed from his ship, and I think there may be something wrong. I can't do anything to help him. Please, send a medical team out here immediately!" Fox listened to the silence coming from his headset, and heard the reply. "...We will get right on it." The instructor sounded nervous, and he had good reason to be. Wolf's ship would collide with the ground at terminal velocity, which had a very good chance in killing him. Fox then heard another voice come through the headset, the voice of Wolf. "DAMN IT, FOX! I'LL GET YOU FOR THIS!"

Fox jerked up out of bed, and smacked his head into the bunk above him. "OUCH! Dammit, I have to remember that thing's there!" Rubbing his head, he looked toward the door, and the angry hare standing in the doorway. "Fox, what do you think you're doing? I go to prepare your speeder, and the thing's in pieces!"

Fox sat there in his bed, still feeling his head for blood, and finally realized that it had been a dream. It wasn't completely a dream, though. It was more of a nightmare, one that had actually happened a year and a half earlier. "Oh, that," Fox replied. "Well, I kinda-"

Peppy interrupted him. "Well, you kinda wrecked your bike to nearly beyond repair. It's a good thing Slippy's with us, or that thing would never fly again. Anyway, we've got a mission." Fox snapped out of his pain. "A mission? From who?" Peppy responded, "General Pepper of Corneria. He says that Andross... Has attacked."

I do like Star Fox very much. I enjoy your story so far. One mistake I found.

Fox quickly hit the throttle to speed up his ship, and Wolf did the same. "You can't outrun me, Fox!" "Who said I was trying to outrun you, Wolf?" Fox said into his headset. He'd never brought his hand off of the throttle, and at this moment he brought it back as far it'd go right as he moved the control stick forward to lower the craft. As he looked up through the top of the cockpit's canopy, he saw Wolf's ship fly overhead.

It should be

Fox quickly hit the throttle to speed up his ship, and Wolf did the same. "You can't outrun me, Fox!"

"Who said I was trying to outrun you, Wolf?" Fox said into his headset. He'd never brought his hand off of the throttle, and at this moment he brought it back as far it'd go right as he moved the control stick forward to lower the craft. As he looked up through the top of the cockpit's canopy, he saw Wolf's ship fly overhead.

Common mistake many people make. No biggie.

I've only played Dinosaur planet and Star Fox Assault, so I can't really pick out things from the story, but I like it overall.

Originally Posted by Vaati

I do like Star Fox very much. I enjoy your story so far. One mistake I found.

Three or four mistakes fixed.

I've only played Dinosaur planet and Star Fox Assault, so I can't really pick out things from the story, but I like it overall.

Well that's good, then. It should all seem very new to you.

Chapter 3: The General's Mission

Fox quickly looked around the room for his clothes. It took him a minute to find them, because the "Fox Den," as it was called, was a complete and utter mess. The Star Fox team lived on the planet of Papetoon, and were criminals. They were only considered criminals to Andross and his empire, but to the rest of the Lylat System, they were heroes. For such a small team with such little to work with to defy an entire empire was something truly heroic. They looted ships belonging to Andross whenever they had the chance and gave most of what they stole to the less fortunate. They kept very little for themselves, which made them very much like Robin Hood and his band of thieves.

The planet Papetoon was on the outer reaches of civilization within the Lylat System. It wasn't as far away from the sytem's star, Solar, as Venom was. However, due to its distance from Corneria, it was one of the first planets that Andross took over when he returned to power. The planet was very different from Corneria. Whereas Corneria had seemingly infinite rolling plains, Papetoon was almost devoid of native life. Most of its surface was covered in rocks and tightly packed earth, which made farming and agriculture very difficult. However, this was not what the planet was used for. Papetoon was the location of massive spaceports that were often visited by creatures from outside of the Lylat System. This was the only reason that anybody ever came to Papetoon after the first colonies were established. Well, besides the fact it was the best place for an outlaw to hide.

This was why Fox McCloud, Peppy Hare, Falco Lombardi, and Slippy Toad had been sent there in the first place. Ever since Fox's father had died bringing down the first empire of Andross, the team had been located on Papetoon. If Andross were still alive, then he would be intent on searching Corneria for James McCloud's son to get his revenge. Knowing this is what Andross would intend to do, the general of the Cornerian Army, General Pepper, had Fox and his companions relocated to Papetoon. After all, the best place to hide from someone was right under their nose.

After finding his clothes and throwing them on as quckly as he could, Fox rushed to the command room. It wasn't near as complex as the bridge of a space battleship, as it only had a few simple holographic displays and some outdated computers. Parts were also strewn about the floor, many of which had fallen from the machines themselves.

"So, what's the mission?" Said fox, as he entered the dimly lit room. All his comrades were already there. Falco was leaning back in a chair, half asleep, with his feet up on the round holographic display in the center of the room. Slippy was tinkering with some sort of device, probably belonging to the computer in the corner with the faceplates hanging off it and the bare circuits exposed. Peppy was sitting at the holographic display in the center of the room, muttering something to himself as his fingers darted around on the keyboard.

"I said, what's the mission?" Peppy looked up, finally realizing that Fox had joined the rest of the team, and began speaking. "About an hour ago, we recieved a transmission from General Pepper of the Cornerian Army." Falco looked up, obviously interested in what he was hearing. If they had gotten a mission from the General, then the mission had to be something challenging.

"I'll play back the message he sent us right now." Peppy looked back down at the set of keys, obviously not finding what he was looking for, and looked side to side. Finally finding what he needed, he picked up a small disk and slid it into the holographic display.

The projector turned on, flickered, and the General's face popped up for a second. Then it all became static, which caused Peppy to lose his patience. "Darn it! Nothing in this place runs properly!" The rest of what he said was inaudible, as he had starting banging his fists against the machine. At every impact, the screen jumped. "You're doing it all wrong, Peppy. You're supposed to do it like this." Slippy had put down the device he was working on, and started looking carefully at the machine. He brought his fist up into the air, and down onto the machine in a loud thud. The display jumped again, and General Pepper's face came back into focus.

"Team Star Fox, we need your help. Andross has returned, and he's launched an attack against Corneria in an attempt to take over the Lylat System. Our army is no match for his weapons, and even as I speak our fleet is being reduced to rubble. We have developed a special craft which we believe may be able to defeat Andross, but we need a group of expert pilots to handle them. Come to Corneria immediately, by any means necessary, so that we can bring an end to Andross and his reign of evil!"

The transmission ended, and the General's face disappeared. The team looked at each other, and then Fox spoke up. "Well, you heard the General. We're heading to Corneria!"

Slippy was the first to respond to Fox. "But how are we supposed to do that? In case you've forgotten, we don't have a ship!"

"Yeah, and we don't have the money to pay for a ride, either." Fox looked at Peppy, who had just said the most obvious of things. If they had money to pay for a ride to Corneria, then they wouldn't have such run-down equipment.

"Why don't we just hitch a ride on some ship heading to Corneria?" Falco said, obviously with a plan in mind. "If Andross is attacking Corneria, then he's going to be sending extra stuff there, right? Maybe we could sneak onto one of his ships as they're leaving the planet."

Peppy looked at Falco with a disapproving expression. "It'd be far too dangerous to sneak onto one of Andross's ships. We'd be killed for sure."

Fox, having thought things over for the past minute, stood up to address his team. "There's no other way to get to Corneria. Andross will have blockaded the planet to keep supplies from getting in. The only way that we can possibly get to Corneria is by sneaking onto one of Andross's supply carriers as it's preparing to leave the planet."

Slippy had been working at a computer during all the planning which had been taking place. "It just so happens that Andross will have several ships landing in the spaceport not far from here in just a few hours. It says so right here." Slippy pointed at the moniter in front of him, which had the flight schedule of several Venomian ships that were set to land in the nearby spaceport, just as he had said. The team wasn't surprised by the fact that Slippy had gotten information like this. He could hack into just about any security system, no matter how encrypted it was, in a matter of minutes.

Fox looked back at the rest of the team, and began speaking once again. "Alright, team Star Fox! Let's get ready to head to Corneria!"