|
#1
[
]
|
||||
|
||||
|
Name: Shiko Moon
Age: 21 Race: Zeloc* Sex: Male Hair: Short red hair with blue tips It's curly and ragged Eyes: Outer iris :red inner iris :pink Weight: 105 pbs. Height: 6'7" Weapon: long(4'9") black dual edged sword with dragon head shaped cross guard long(2'7") hilt(can cut rock) Strengths: Wise in a lot of ways. He can solve almost any puzzle Weakness: Water (It burns him) Skills/Magic: He knows a lot of healing spells.(Names: all spells are brought out by saying shi-no heal.(name of person) Then the strainth of the spell (Weak, medium, or *full) (*Only works once a week)) He also has a couple fire spell(Called by saying sha-no fire) Appearance: He wears a long cloak covering his entire body its red and ragged in the middle of it it has a smyble of a two headed black dragon. He has dark purple skin(curntly tan). He has round eyes, long hears, long mouth, and a medium size nose. He also has long legs 12 and ½ size feet, no shoes, long arms, and normal size fingers. He has a scar that runs from the middle of his forehead to his mouth, a black bracelet on his left arm with the words "life and death only truths" on it. On his back he has wings they are red and large He carries a stone made from a zecone*. Personality: He is smart he talks to his village in a friendly matter, but with opponents he gets a bit mad. He love all things dead or alive. He only hates evil people. His favorite calor is red because it reminds him of his home planet. He loves no one. His favorite food is a ligush fruit*. Biography:*He was born on a planet called Cornan. His people were a wise sort. The planet was a lush green haven. Like all the Zeloc he had wings. He flew for hours but one day a t the age of 7 he had to go into the woods and find a *zecone: A large rock like animal with really hard skin. He was to find a stone from this animal and bring it back. This stone made a person run really fast. When he found this animal they had a fierce fight. He used a fire spell and killed it and brought the stone back. Now when he got back there was a feast held at every 7-year olds birth day who lives the attack. his people were happy. They gave him lots of ligush fruit. This fruit gave the eater lots of power. When he was 14 a black whole opened up near his house. His parents were sucked in and killed. His whole village was killed. He got away in a safe haven temple. After the black hole disappeared he went to a teleporter called a : pokop and went to earth. There he made a house using left over wood he found. When he was 15 he found a village of humans who took him in. he lived there for 4 years. When he was 18 he went to a mountain called : lopigh there he found a sword. He had to kill 500 valins, little bat-like creatures with horns. After he got his sword he went back to his village. Now he made a liquid called figish which he then replaced the humans water with every thing grew 10 fold. When he was 21 he went to find a place to hone his skills. he still has not found a place to do so.
__________________
![]() sig and avi done by Umi I am a member of The love all of God's creations! my ba char Shiko moon Last edited by orihimefan7; 09-30-2007 at 08:45 PM. |

|
#2
[
]
|
|||
|
|||
|
Re: shiko moon
Okay, first off, I would like you to explain what a Zeloc is. At least, if that race is any different from a human.
Next, you need to expand his personality and biography slightly. They need to have a bit more detail. Finally, sentences begin with a capital letter and end with a punctuation mark. Please, put his Appearance and Personality sections into complete sentences and correct most of the grammical errors. It would help to put Shiko's profile through a word processor like Microsoft Word. It can find most of the spelling and grammical errors and help you correct them. Alright, work on that and I'll take another look at him.
__________________
![]() ![]() [Siggy by the Lady Knives. Banner by insaney.] [Ranarath's Amazing Oddities] |

| Sponsored Links |
|
#3
[
]
|
||||
|
||||
|
Re: shiko moon
There you go i made it a little longer
__________________
![]() sig and avi done by Umi I am a member of The love all of God's creations! my ba char Shiko moon |

|
#4
[
]
|
|||
|
|||
|
Re: shiko moon
Mmm... alright.
*Approvedeth*
__________________
![]() ![]() [Siggy by the Lady Knives. Banner by insaney.] [Ranarath's Amazing Oddities] |

| Sponsored Links |
|
#5
[
]
|
||||
|
||||
|
Thnx Lots
![]()
__________________
![]() sig and avi done by Umi I am a member of The love all of God's creations! my ba char Shiko moon |

![]() |
| Thread Tools | |
|
|