Rain

Name: Rain
Age: 16
Race: Elf
Sex: Male
Hair: Dirty blonde
Eyes: Green
Weight: 220lbs.
Height: 6"

Weapon:
Elven sword-a curved blade that can pierce all flesh known to the elves, and looks like a scimitar. The sword is 5 feet long, curved. Sapphire studded on the hilt. The hilt is silver.

Elven Bow-pierces all armor known to the elves. It's a short bow, needs alot of pull strength. Leather wrapped around where the chord is tied to the bow. Elven designs all along the bow.

Armor:
Elven Chain mail-Cannot break. Helps owner perform powerful magical abilities.

Strengths: Strong, fast, cunning, smart, Ice and water magic’s. Close combat and good accuracy with a bow.

Weakness: Fire and Dark magic. Something hapening to Jasmine.

Skills/Magic:
Heal-Heals minor cuts and wounds.

Ice arrow-more or less what link uses in Zelda.

Ice blade- puts ice all around the sword making it longer and freezes what it hits.

Personality: Funny, serious only when needed to be. Even though he is affectionate towards the ladies, he stays true to his one and only loves Jasmine. Not to prideful but tends to show off every once in awhile. There is something about him that makes him liked by everyone who meets him. Religious. Can talk him out of most situations and knows how to hide his emotions. His face never betrays him.

Appearance: Hair falls down just below the neck, and goes around his 4 inch ears. Perfect white teeth. A very solid body. Very agile. Wears a dark blue cloak with silver enlaced through it. Leather shoes. Wears a sword strapped to his left side and a bow on his back. Wears silver pantaloons. Has a necklace which at the end of it is a Dolphin. His nose is about medium size and not too pointed. Eye that are the purest of green.

History:
Rain grew up in a forest, where two different Elven clans were at war. The war started because someone dishonored the other clans princess when she was going to marry Rain's clan's prince. Rain's Elvels are wood elves and call themselves the Vin~Tak clan, which means strength and honor. The other Elves are also wood elves but are called the Gin~Tuk, which means shadows and dust ,They reside in another Forest.

At a young age he studied allot, He is now very good at Statistics and Science.He started to learn and train when he was 5. He knows how to make herbal medicines. Learned how to fight when he was a 7 years old. He doesn't know everything about fighting, but he does have some skill with a blade. He learned a couple of magic skills from his Uncle Tobias, but could only comprehend the ice and water magic’s. When he was at the age of 14 and 1/2,he leaded a small raiding party and did major damage to the other clan. Six months later the 17 year war ended. Now Rain goes on diplomatic missions with his older brother, Shadow, to try and unite all of the Elf clans.

His sister, Sylvanus, is a princess. Rain is a prince. But is fourth in line so he doesn't worry about the family line. His Father is King and mother is Queen. His older brother, Will, (named after a human who helped the King) who was the one to be married to the clan. His other two brothers are twins, Perrytwin and Peppertwin.

Rain has a girlfriend named Jasmine who lives at the edge of the forest. She is a human blessed at birth by an old wizard, she was blest with inmortality. Most elves except her, those that don't hate are mad at Rain for loving a human. But their loyalty will never change. Rain met Jasmine during the war. He and his group were tracking an enemy raiding party. They caught up with the enemy just in time to save her. When Rain saw her, he thought that was the most beautiful person ever.

Now that the war is over, Rain spends most of his time With Jasmine. But every once in a while he be with his friends or doing a mission for his fater. Right now he is ccurrently at Jasmines

Oi, sorry for the wait; we're a little understaffed at the moment. ^__^

For starters, you need to expand a few things, specifically weapons. Other than what the weapon can do, you need to describe what it looks like. You also need to expand your strengths and weaknesses, ESPECIALLY your weaknesses. Take a few magic skills off -- he's got to many to begin with. After to battle for a time, you can win an upgrade to bring some of them back. I'd say take off three or so.

Now, your bio. Complete sentences are a MUST. I want you to run it through a grammar and spelling check, like from Microsoft Word.

Fix up these things, and we'll see what we can do.

Alright, I found a few more things:

1) Weaknesses. He just needs more. Is he slow? Is he smart? Is he afraid of anything that could potentially harm him? Look at some other characters' weaknesses for ideas if you have to. But you need a few more.

2)

Ripped from chest to calf, his legs were built for running.

Ripped? And for the record, all legs were built for running; some people just choose not to indulge that gift.

3) Just take those six spells out altogether and save them somewhere on your computer. When you are granted an upgrade, then you can add them in. But for right now, just take those out of the bio altogether.

4)Bio doesn't really have a satisfactory ending. Just write a little blurb about what Rain's up to in the present time. Like, most people end with their character wandering away from their home/family for whatever reason.

Nice effort, so I hope after these, you can get out there! ^_^