Sky Waverly

I am very very very very sorry! I simply didn't understand what you meant. I'm new to this whole forum thing.

Name: Sky Waverly

Age: 25

Race: Human/Lightning Dragon Elemental

Sex: Male.

Hair: Short, dark brown hair.

Eyes: Gold

Weight: About 170 pounds.

Height: Six feet, two inches

Weapon: A golden broadsword named Tonitrus. It is almost indestructible.

Armor: Sky wears no armor, but is more resilient than a human, and is unaffected by electrical attacks.

Strengths: Sky is very strong, definitely not Superman level, but he could probably lift a small car with a lot of effort on a good day. He is also very agile, and a master swordsman. When Sky’s friends are in danger, he will help them no matter what, and his strength is increased.

Weakness: Sky has a very short temper and has a lot of anger issues. When he gets angry his attacks become stronger, but he gets clumsy and makes rookie mistakes. His wings are also vulnerable to projectiles. He has little control over the lightning he shoots once it leaves his body, so his attacks are very inaccurate over long distances.

Skills/Magic: Sky doesn’t use magic except for a little spell to hide his wings in public, but he can generate lightning. He can also fly due to the dragon wings on his back. He has limited telepathy, as he can tell the flow of people’s thought.

Appearance: The first thing you would notice about Sky, if he revealed them to you, would be the golden dragon wings on his back. The second thing you would notice would be his muscle. He has a lot of muscles due to a rapid growth spurt after his powers came in. He has a long sheath at his waist where his sword is kept.

Personality: Sky is very kind to his friends and family, but he has a lot of grudges with his enemies. When he enters battle, he is solely interested on winning. He gets frustrated at the smallest things, especially when his parents are mentioned. Sky is extremely loyal and trusting, even to the point that it can be used against him. He loves to laugh, especially at other’s expense.

Biography: Sky and his twin sister Melly were orphaned as newborns when their parents were killed saving the world from evil. They were raised by foster parents in Ohio. When Sky and Melly turned sixteen, they learned that they were not fully human. They each have the spirit of an elemental. Sky has the spirit of a lightning dragon in him, and Melly has the spirit of a siren. (I’ll explain what that means later). They attended a school where the goal was to help elementals develop their powers and succeed in the world. The night that Sky gained his powers, he woke up to find a small pair of wings on his back. Due to a spell on the school building, the transformation only took one night, so by the morning Sky had a full pair of dragon wings.
While on a quest looking for others of his kind, Sky found a conclave of other elementals run by four dragons. The dragons taught him how to use the four elements in battle with the aid of a special amulet. Afterwards, Sky learned that the conclave was actually trying to enslave the human race to their will. In a burst of anger, Sky crushed his amulet and fled along with another elemental named Isaac, who was vital to the conclave’s plan. Sky is currently continuing his search for others like him.
Ok, so a long, long, long time ago when creatures we consider mythical were commonplace, the mythical creatures realized that they were dying out. So, they decided to merge their spirits with certain humans. The humans then gained their powers and abilities. When these “demihumans” reproduced, their children also gained the spirits’ powers. So now, there are a lot of people like Sky in the present day, but nobody knows about them except certain people in the government. Phew. It took me a long time to think all this up.

Okay then, let the shredding begin. >=3 (Kidding, I'm actually here to help. =P)

Originally Posted by SkyDragon

Name: Sky Waverly. Yep that’s it.

Good for him.

Age: 17

I'm so tired of people making characters betwnn 15 and 21 (Lol, hypocrite)

Not a judgement, just an exasperation. X_x

Race: Human/Lightning Dragon Elemental

That must've been a hair-raising experiance for the human. xD

Sex: Male.

No Comment.

Hair: Short, dark brown hair.

No Comment.

Eyes: Gold

Better then Port/Starboard eyes, that's for sure. xD

Weight: About 180 pounds.

Fatty. =P

Height: Six feet, two inches

Ah. Ignore the above then.

Weapon: A golden broadsword named Tonitrus. It is almost indestructible.

Oh good, should he get vaporised the opponent can take his sword! =D

Armor: None

Because protection is SO overrated.

Strengths: Sky is very strong, not Superman level, but he could probably lift a car without too much effort. He is also very quick and agile. He is somewhat indestructible. For example, if he got shot by a bullet, there would be blood and it would certainly hurt, but it wouldn’t go all the way through his skin.

Okay, being serious now. He is FAR overpowered for a first character. Lose the indestructable bit, and maybe limit his speed and agility somewhat. Also, a benchmark on his speed is encouraged.

Weakness: Sky has a very short temper and has a lot of anger issues. When he gets angry he becomes clumsy. His wings are also vulnerable to projectiles.

More weaknesses please. Clumsy and vunerable wings just don't cut it.

Skills/Magic: Sky doesn’t use magic except for a little spell to hide his wings in public, but he can generate and manipulate lightning. He can also fly due to the dragon wings on his back.

How can he generate and manipulate lighting? Vaugness can mean power, and if he can 'manipulate' lightning into someone's heart, nine time out of ten, they die. Be specific please... very specific.

Appearance: The first thing you would notice about Sky would be the golden dragon wings on his back. They’re kind of hard to miss. The second thing you would notice would be his muscle. He has a lot of muscles for a seventeen-year-old. He has a long sheath at his waist where his sword is kept.

Yet he hides them, remember... so how would that be the first think people notice about him? Also, 17-year olds do not get that muscular unless they exercise constantly and take steroids. Of course, you can explain this away by saying it's race-related or whatever.

Personality: Sky’s personality is very much like Link’s. He is very kind and gentle to everyone, and is always ready to help someone in danger.

Not going to cut it. Link from Zelda fame is more of an avatar and thus has little to no personality. Be deep, be detailed... cover any circumstance you may think he'll come across.

Biography: Sky and his twin sister Melly were orphaned as newborns when their parents were killed saving the world from evil. They were raised by foster parents in Ohio. When Sky and Melly turned sixteen, they learned that they were not fully human. They each have the spirit of an elemental. Sky has the spirit of a lightning dragon in him, and Melly has the spirit of a siren. (I’ll explain what that means later). They attended a school where the goal was to help elementals develop their powers and succeed in the world. Ok, so a long, long, long time ago when creatures we consider mythical were commonplace, the mythical creatures realized that they were dying out. So, they decided to merge their spirits with certain humans. The humans then gained their powers and abilities. When these “demihumans” reproduced, their children also gained the spirits’ powers. So now, there are a lot of people like Sky in the present day, but nobody knows about them except certain people in the government. Phew. It took me a long time to think all this up.

Please, seperate this into proper paragraphs. Paragraphs are generally three (3) to five (5) sentances long.

Please fix all of that and I'll give him another look.

Sorry if I seemed harsh, but that's my way. =P

Thanks for the input. How about this?

Name: Sky Waverly.

Age: 17

Race: Human/Lightning Dragon Elemental

Sex: Male.

Hair: Short, dark brown hair.

Eyes: Gold

Weight: About 170 pounds.

Height: Six feet, two inches

Weapon: A golden broadsword named Tonitrus. It is almost indestructible.

Armor: None

Strengths: Sky is very strong, definitely not Superman level, but he could probably lift a small car with a lot of effort on a good day. He is also very agile.

Weakness: Sky has a very short temper and has a lot of anger issues. When he gets angry he becomes clumsy. His wings are also vulnerable to projectiles. He has little control over the lightning he shoots once it leaves his body, so his attacks are very inaccurate over long distances.

Skills/Magic: Sky doesn’t use magic except for a little spell to hide his wings in public, but he can generate lightning. He can also fly due to the dragon wings on his back.

Appearance: The first thing you would notice about Sky, if he revealed them to you, would be the golden dragon wings on his back. The second thing you would notice would be his muscle. He has a lot of muscles for a seventeen-year-old, due to a rapid growth spurt after his powers came in. He has a long sheath at his waist where his sword is kept.

Personality: Sky is very kind to his friends and family, but he has a lot of grudges with his enemies. When he enters battle, he is solely interested on winning.

Biography: Sky and his twin sister Melly were orphaned as newborns when their parents were killed saving the world from evil. They were raised by foster parents in Ohio. When Sky and Melly turned sixteen, they learned that they were not fully human. They each have the spirit of an elemental. Sky has the spirit of a lightning dragon in him, and Melly has the spirit of a siren. (I’ll explain what that means later). They attended a school where the goal was to help elementals develop their powers and succeed in the world.
Ok, so a long, long, long time ago when creatures we consider mythical were commonplace, the mythical creatures realized that they were dying out. So, they decided to merge their spirits with certain humans. The humans then gained their powers and abilities. When these “demihumans” reproduced, their children also gained the spirits’ powers. So now, there are a lot of people like Sky in the present day, but nobody knows about them except certain people in the government. Phew. It took me a long time to think all this up.

A few things:

1) You don't need to repost the whole thing. Juist edit what you have.

2) Add more to strengths and weaknesses. How does his personality help or cripple his abilities?

3) Speaking of personality, right now he has all the personality of a toothpick. Please, expand.

4) Please, go into more detail on certain parts of his history. If it's vauge, or important, add to it.

Remember: A profile is met for others to see your character, not for you to tell us about him. Let us see how he acts in battle, with friends, etc. If you need help, please view any of my characters in the link provided in my signature.

I changed a few other things as well.

Age: 25

Armor: Sky wears no armor, but he is more resiliant than a human, and is unaffected by electrical attacks.

Skills/Magic: Sky doesn’t use magic except for a little spell to hide his wings in public, but he can generate lightning. He can also fly due to the dragon wings on his back. He has limited telepathy, as he can tell the flow of people’s thought.

Strengths: Sky is very strong, definitely not Superman level, but he could probably lift a small car with a lot of effort on a good day. He is also very agile, and a master swordsman. When Sky’s friends are in danger, he will help them no matter what, and his strength is increased.

Weakness: Sky has a very short temper and has a lot of anger issues. When he gets angry his attacks become stronger, but he gets clumsy and makes rookie mistakes. His wings are also vulnerable to projectiles. He has little control over the lightning he shoots once it leaves his body, so his attacks are very inaccurate over long distances.

Personality: Sky is very kind to his friends and family, but he has a lot of grudges with his enemies. When he enters battle, he is solely interested on winning. He gets frustrated at the smallest things, especially when his parents are mentioned. Sky is extremely loyal and trusting, even to the point that it can be used against him. He loves to laugh, especially at other’s expense.

Biography: Sky and his twin sister Melly were orphaned as newborns when their parents were killed saving the world from evil. They were raised by foster parents in Ohio. When Sky and Melly turned sixteen, they learned that they were not fully human. They each have the spirit of an elemental. Sky has the spirit of a lightning dragon in him, and Melly has the spirit of a siren. (I’ll explain what that means later). They attended a school where the goal was to help elementals develop their powers and succeed in the world. The night that Sky gained his powers, he woke up to find a small pair of wings on his back. Due to a spell on the school building, the transformation only took one night, so by the morning Sky had a full pair of dragon wings.

While on a quest looking for others of his kind, Sky found a conclave of other elementals run by four dragons. The dragons taught him how to use the four elements in battle with the aid of a special amulet. Afterwards, Sky learned that the conclave was actually trying to enslave the human race to their will. In a burst of anger, Sky crushed his amulet and fled along with another elemental which was vital to the conclave’s plan. Sky is currently continuing his search for others like him.

Ok, so a long, long, long time ago when creatures we consider mythical were commonplace, the mythical creatures realized that they were dying out. So, they decided to merge their spirits with certain humans. The humans then gained their powers and abilities. When these “demihumans” reproduced, their children also gained the spirits’ powers. So now, there are a lot of people like Sky in the present day, but nobody knows about them except certain people in the government. Phew. It took me a long time to think all this up.

You DO NOT need to keep reposting most, or all of the profile! Just update the first post by clicking the big "EDIT" button on the bottom-right of your post, and just say you edited it!

Sorry, if that was taken in a mean context, but I already told you about this and was througly ignored.

As it stands, what you have in that edit is good. Edit the profile on the first post, and I'll take another look, understand?