Fou-Lu

Name: Fou-Lu

Age: 32

Race: Human

Sex: Male

Hair: Short and Dark

Eyes: Brown

Weight: 80 kg

Height: 1.97 Meters

Weapon: A big and large sword,a bow,bombs and some knifes.
Armor:A dark armor known as Dragon Scale.

Strengths: He got a great agility and strenght.

Weakness: He's not very good with magic and he's not very good against magic and illusions.

Skills/Magic: Can make his sword be enchanted with fire.

Appearance: He is tall very strong uses a black cape and a black armor.He carries some bombs in the belt some knifes hide in the clothes and in his boots a big sword and a bow in his back.

Personality: He's very lonely don't like to work with others,he's not a hero or a bad guy just kills who interfer in his goal.

Biography: He was born in a small village at the north of Europe.His father was a blacksmith and his mom always was at home.His father taught him to use a sword and fight with his hands.They were very poor and one day...Some soldiers from an army called the Black Falcon robbed his house killed his father and raped his mother while he was under the bed with fear...So after this he have taken an armor from his dad and took a sword with the objective to kill all the army who destroyed his life.After 15 years of what happened he encountered an old and mad man in the way.The man told him that one time a legendary guy known as the Red-Eyes Mercenary was ambushed on that route and killed the old man was his pupil and waited in that road for the rest of his live to accomplish his mentor last wish that was to give his armor and sword to a man who could make a good use of it.The old man sayed that if he can win a battle against he,he would give the sword and the armor to him.He slayed the old man after a battle of 2 days and took the sword and the armor and continued his quest against the Black Falcon army.

Please aprove it

1.97m tall and only 80kg? Holy crap, that's skinny.

This character is Not Approved.

Here are some suggestions to get you going:

• First of all, go look at some approved characters. I don't mean the first page of the characters list. Those are very old, and almost universally not current standards.
  
• How does he have a fire enchantment on his sword? Is it temporary? How does he make it so? Does it erupt in flames, get red hot? Explode into a shower of psychedelic flowers? Details are your friends.
  
• What kind of bombs does he carry?
  
• Are "big sword" and "large sword" the same weapon, or different? Either way, what kind of sword is that? A claymore? How about that bow? Longbow?
  
• What kind of armor does he wear? Is it thick? Metal? Cloth? Leather?
  
• That personality is about as dynamic as a cardboard box. Possibly one that's caught out in a rainstorm...but a cardboard box all the same. Some idea of his thought process would be good.
  
• Biography. Definitely too short. Here's some more specifics.
  • Northern Europe? There's a lot of that. Does that mean Norway? Scotland? Estonia? Pick a country.
  • Truth be told, I can barely follow what you're talking about in that tale. The biggest problems are a total lack of paragraphs, plus the extreme amount of glossing over you've got going on.
  • How would a X year old (you don't specify how old he is when the whole 'his father was killed and his mother raped' thing happened) not get himself killed while going off to slaughter an army by himself?
  • Who's this red-eyes mercenary guy? Why's he important?
  • Might I suggest brushing up on your English grammar a bit? "The old man sayed that if he can win a battle against he,he would give the sword and the armor to him." Is nigh illegible.

So, yeah, work on those things, and then we can look at it again.

Ok,Thanks I will work on it.

PS:I'm from Brazil so I'm not that good in english. :p