story of the shiekah's end end

it was like any other day.
the sun was shining brightly and music was being played by the village elders.
i was playing with my friends, in the glistening water, splashing, learning how to swim.
there was an earthquake, a big one, it didn't seem normal.
the village elders loked up to the sky, which had turned a violent shade of red.
they looked at one another and started to speak.
i was to far away to hear anything but i heard this
'this is the end...'
my friends were crying and runnig to their mothers.
i had noone to go to because my parents and relatives were dead. i stood there, alone and scared.
i gathered my wits and fled the land.
but i stopped and turned round.
i saw a figure, floating as if on a solid but invisible platform.
he was shouting. the village elders and the adults stood fast and fired energy balls at him.
once the smoke cleared, there was laughing.
somehow, miraculously, he had survived.
he raised his arm to the air, and out of his palm came a red ball, it looked like fire.
e threw it to the ground, still laughing, but an evil laugh.
the ball hit the groud with some force, i felt the shockwave which knocked me down and i was out cold.
i woke up to see that the sky had turned back to normal.
i looked to the horizen and saw only burned wood and smoke.
i ran as fast as i could.
once as i got there i stopped. i wanted to scream, but no sound came out.
there was bodies littered everywhere.
i buried them and vowed to look for the man who did it to them.
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so this is why i'm here now, hero of time, to see that you look for this man who is king of evil, and so you can destroy him and make my wishes come true.
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this is my first story,
if i get a good reply i might just make a sequel to this.
so please read review and reply
~SS

nice, it seems kinda odd though, i'd write a longer story if it was me. i mean look at some of mine, i'm an amiture myself.

ooo....very suspenseful. I like it, though it seems a bit short. I like the view from the child and then showing the dialogue at the end. I can't wait to see more!