Termina's Past Fan Fic Pt1

Prologue
This is a legend, people today even speak of… There was a country that went by the name of Termina. It was peaceful, and prosperous. Until one day, a little Imp wearing a mask came, and things started to go wrong. The moon started to fall, and just before the town was destroyed, a boy garbed in green came out of nowhere and stopped it with his mysterious power to control time. He is known as the hero of time. But this tale we are about to tell, isn’t that tale. It is the tale….. of what happened before of what they call… the Dark Age.
Chapter 1
Looking beyond the desert mist, there lay an army. The Ikanian Army. Right before them, lay the Terminian army. They are both sworn rivals. The King Ikana tells his army to charge. The Terminian leader, Link tells them to charge. They do so. After a very long, bloody battle, all hope for the Terminians seemed to be lost. Only three soldiers remained. Link, the leader. One of the more graceful soldiers. Leon, the slightly off aim soldier. And Darmani, the Goron.
The only Ikanian soldiers left were the Stalfos team, and the mighty Iron Knuckle. The leader Link, told his soldiers to stand back. He took charge him self. First he went for the Iron Knuckle. Right before the Ikanian soldier could attack, Link grabbed the giant axe he was wielding and spun it around, cutting the soldier in two. He then went for the Stalfos team. Right before Link could easily take them down, they called a truce. “We WILL take the Terminian army down one day, we swear it! Watch your back kid!” The Ikanian army said. Then they walked away drifting into the misty desert air…

I love this idea, and your fan game looks great, but now that you've started a fic, I gotta be critical :razz:

Slow down. These are way too short. There's no detail, no description at all. You must be able to paint a full picture in the reader's head. Take your time, make 'em longer, and make 'em detailed

I have to agree with Mirren, you need to slow down and pay attention to detail, that's what will really make your idea work.
Prologue

This is a legend, people today even speak of… There was a country that went by the name of Termina.

Ok, this is just a little thing but isn't Termina a world not a country. I figured you couldn't really have a parallel country without the whole world being parallel. Just a thought.