Red Vs. Blue, the Blood Gultch Cronicles

So, is anyone else on ZU obsessed with RvB as much as I am. I have like all the old shows, and all the new ones, and I'm a member.

For thoes of you that don't know, RvB (red vs. blue) is a hilerious internet show made using halo multiplayer for Xbox. It has an awsome plot, and keeps you laughing minute after minute. If you downloaded the shows right now, you wouldn't understand them because they are in the 4th season, but if you need the 1st, 2nd, and 3rd, I suggest limewire, or other file sharing programs.

So if you do know what I'm talking about, tell me what you like about the show, for me, it is in the first episode, it was the funniest part of the whole show, in all 4 seasons.

Sarge: May I introduce the our new light reconnaissance vehicle! It has four-inch armour plating, mag bumper suspension, a mounted machine gunner position, and total seating for three. Gentlemen, this is the M12LRV! I like to call it the Warthog.
Simmons: Why Warthog, sir?
Sarge: Because "M12LRV' is too hard to say in conversation, son.
Grif: No, but... Why Warthog? I mean, it doesn't really look like a pig.
Sarge: Say that again.
Grif: I think it looks more like a puma.
Sarge: What in Sam Hell is a puma?
Simmons: You mean like the shoe company?
Grif: No. Like a puma. It's a big cat. Like a lion.
Sarge: You're makin' that up.
Grif: I'm telling you, it's a real animal.
Sarge: Simmons, I want you to poison Grif's next meal.
Simmons: Yes, sir!
Sarge: [Points at front of the Warthog] Look, see these two tailhooks? They look like tusks. And what kind of animal has tusks?
Grif: A walrus.
Sarge: Didn't I just tell you to stop makin' up animals?

The puma (I mean warthog):

Those are funny. I am not 'obsessed' though. I do occasionally go and watch them. "Go get me the Puma."

the best one is when they are talking about the transition from halo 1 to halo 2.

Ya, those are pretty funny. I have every episode on my computer. Also a good place to get the earlier episodes That Weasel Television.

Sarge: So are you done making things up?

Grif:.. huh... yes.

Sarge: You sure? What about Leprachaun? Big Foot? Fairy? Dragon? Hey Simmons, what's that lizard thing in Mexico? You know, eats goats.

Simmons: That would be a Chupacabra sir!

Sarge: Hey Grif, chupa-thingy, how 'bout that? Got a ring to it...

Hahahaha, that's probably the best joke, besides pink armor.

Simmons: "There's somthing about your amour, it is, how do you say it, Grif, help me out here"
Grif: "Its pink, your armour's PINK!"
Dount: "Its no pink, it's lightish red"
Grif:"No what, they already have a color for lightish red, and you know what it's called...PINK"

That's not exact, but it is close.

*points to his signature and his custom rank* I rest my case.

I like RvB. I've only seen the first season though on Winamp. It had some pretty funny stuff. Like the pink armor guy, the puma thing and stuff. I like the part where that one new guy steals the other teams flag.

I should probably download all of the episodes.

Tucker: Where are we?

Caboose: We are in the future! Things here are veeery shiiiny.

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Simmons: Hello? Sarge can you read me? I seem to be trapped between a nexus of portals that could take me to anywhere in the known universe!.... Or the janitors closet hell I don't ******ing know!...

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*a bunch of guys are laying on the ground dead*

Caboose: Ahh, it must be naptime! But wait... naptime come before pants time, not after... I think these people are just making up times.

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Random blue guy 1: Everyone! Everyone! Stop fighting!..... Look unto me! I posses the Red flag!

Random blue guy 2: It's more beautiful than I every imagined!

Random blue guy 1: I have seen the top of the mountain! And you'll all worship me as though I were a god!

*blue guy one gets beaten by Red guys in one second*

dying blue guy: Ahh! I regret nothing! I lived as you men dare to dream!

Why is this in the Gaming Forum? RvB is something you WATCH.

Anyway, I love this show. My fav character is Doc/O'Malley. I know, they're seprate characters. But the coversations between the two make laugh so much. Here are some of my favourite quotes:

O'Malley: I will feast on their entrails!
Doc: BUT I'M A VEGETARIAN!

O'Malley: [Evil Laugh]*Picks up Rocket Launcher and aims it the Blues and Red* PREPARE TO TASTE OBLIVION!
Doc: Cover your ears! This thing is really loud!

O'Malley: I will crush every living soul to dust! [Evil Laugh] Except for you Vic, I'll make you assisstant crusher.
Vic: Okay dude. Looking foward to that.

Simmions: Oh shut up. Your armour's pink.

Griff: If only we had bes sheets...
Church: Bed sheets!? There's no window! What good will tieing them together and throwing ourselves at them will do?
Griff: Who said anything about tieing them together? If I have to die of hunger, I want to do it in my sleep!

Red Zealot: HEY BLUE, LET'S WORK TOGETHER!
Blue Zealot: WHAT'D'YA MEAN?!
Red Zealot: I'M COMING OUT!
Blue Zealot: ...OKAY!
*Blue and Red Zealots meet each other in the creek*
Blue Zealot: ...YOU SAID WE'D WORK AS A TEAM!
*Red Zealot kills Blue Zealot*
Red Zealot: I BASH YOU OVER THE HEAD WITH MY RIFLE AND YOU DIE! GOOD TEAMWORK YOU ****ING N00B!

O'Malley: I will devour your hearts and crap out your souls!
Donut: Uh oh, that doesn't sound too good!

O'Malley: They will taste oblivion! Which tastes just like Red Bull! Which is disgusting!

The Sarge: Codeword: Dirtbag.
*Robot attacks Griff*
Simmons: That is AWESOME, sir. Here, let me try: Codeword: Dirtbag.
*Robot attacks Griff again*
Griff: OW! Okay, two can play at that game! Codeword: Dirtbag!
*Robot attacks Griff again*

Caboose: I knew it! We're all gonna die! *Aims Sniper Rifle at Tucker's head* ...Starting with you.

Caboose: Quick! Quick! Fix the tank! So I can say hello to Shelia! ...And start killing everyone.
Tucker: You mean the Reds, right?
Caboose: Of course! For starters.

Caboose: My name is Michael J. Caboose. And I HATE BABIES!!

Caboose: I will eat your own hapiness!

Caboose: Now I am thinking of kittens! Kittens... covered... in spikes!

Whooo... I'll think I'll post more later.

lol, i put this in the game section b/c it is made w/ halo, for even more quotes, go to rvb quotes.

Sarge: it makes perfect sense, it goes me, than you, than me, than me again, than you, than simmons, than me, me , me me, you, me, simmons, me, you, me...and than me again... it makes perfect sense.

Simmons: doe4sn't than mean you go twice as much as us...or ten times as much.

I would have put in more, but some ppl havnt seen season 4 yet

Actually, it does belong in entertainment, which already has a thread about this, but oh well.

Simmons: Shotgun!
Grif: Shotgun... ****!
Donut: Shotgun's lap!
Simmons: ****!

If you have seen the PSA, "Difference Between Real Life and the Internet" you'll get the random quotes that follow.

Sarge: Would you like a bigger penis? Where would you like it; I can suggest some places!

Real Life
Church: Look, that's just how I feel about it.
Sarge: Well, I disagree, but I respect your opinion.
Internet
Church: You deserve to die! Die and go to hell and burn!
Sarge: Well, I hope you get raped… twice! Then maybe you'll feel differently…jerk!
Grif: We don't *need* to find weapons of mass destruction, we just need to *want* to! That's how it works!
Simmons: I voted for Nader; I hate everyone!
Medical Officer DuFresne (Doc): Have you considered changing your homepage to MoveOn.org?
Donut: Politics gets me sooo horny! Check out my webcam pics at PresidentialSluts.com!


Tucker (maybe, I don't remeber for sure...): I hate Creed, I hate you, and I hate the bands you like!
Simmons: Creed sucks!

PM me if you want to duel with quotes, I have almost all of the entire thing memorized.

O, i didn't check that... o well

I forgot one of my favorite quotes, which also happens to be my custom title.

Church: So how are you doing Caboose? Are you following any of this whatsoever?
Caboose: I think so. That guy Tex is really a robot... and you're his boyfriend. So that makes you... a gay robot.
Church: Yeah. That's right. I'm a gay robot.

Got to be one of the best.

Caboose: Wait, I think Tucker might be right. I'm hearing a voice inside my head!

Church: What? What does it sound like?

Caboose: It was a voice saying "Blarg blarg blarg honk."

Alien: Honk!

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Tucker: Well, what kinda car is it?

Church: I dunno. Kinda looks like a big cat.

Tucker: What, you mean like a puma?

Church: Yeah man there you go.


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Sarge: Hey Lopez! How'd you to shoot grif?

Lopez: Si Senor. Muchas Gracias.


Great stuff. Caboose = best character. Sarge is pretty funny too. Wait, I take that back. The Covenant in season 4 that talks in blargs and honks. Cracks me up every time I hear it.

Church: I didn't want to mess with the timeline.
Caboose: Time... line?
[sighs]
Caboose: Time isn't made of lines! It is made of circles. That is why clocks are round.
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Caboose: I'm not gonna get married. My dad always said: "Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free."
Church: Hey rookie, did you just call my girlfriend a cow?
Tucker: No I think he called her a slut.
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Sarge: Get over here! Gimme a boost!
Caboose: Ok... You are a good person, and people say nice things about you.
Sarge: Not a morale boost, moron, a physical one. I need to see what's in that window.
Caboose: That window is very high, I don't think you are tall enough.
Sarge:: I know, I need you to help me look thr