The owner of this very bar had been working on a particular sign for years. It would have gone next to his Health Bureau Rating of D, which he insisted stood for Deliciously Clean, and ran something like this:

No sHiRt,
No sHuEz,
aNd No GiPsyz.

He had been making this sign to prevent just such an evening as this--but every time he'd finished painting the thing and set it out somewhere to dry, it just seemed to disappear into the shadows mysteriously...

...It was generally agreed that there was nothing strange about this at all, and that no one should ask questions of the shadow magic-wielding gypsy with the notoriously mean-looking glare and even meaner punch.

I'd like to take this moment to clarify that if the guy had just joined in on my damn song, the fight never would have started.

Anyway--as soon as the first idiot shouted what might have been the call that stirs up the most attention in a crowd--even more than maybe "FIRE!" and "FREE FOOD!"--the entire ring of people that had been around me, submissively joining in on "These Boots Were Made for Walking" out of fear for their lives, hightailed it out of the bar before the last shout rang out. Grown men and ogres were crying, others beating the ever-living snot out of one another, and still yet others taking this opportunity to snatch up the drinks the various runners or brawlers had just left behind and ownerless.

Amidst all the usual barfight action--if you can really say he was amidst, the way he stood implying he was one of those "man as an island" types--was the guy from before, carrying himself with the level of outward calmness that only the really hammered can attain. Usually, while they're drooling on a pillow. I strode up to him--why? I was singing about boots a minute ago. Why's really not a factor here, is it? Well, I strode up to him, pulling a shortsword off the wall by the bar, and prodded him in the stomach with it.

"Y, y, you--the one who's got a face like you just stepped in steaming camel dung. Why aren't you running out of....of...my bar?"

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[A timid shapeshifter with an unexpected, inner wolf "side".]
[Mahalia's Profile]-[Myth on the Moors]