I want to say one last thing about the first chapter. The way you have it set up, having it a bit of mystery is fine. I think I was being overly critical about it, the way you wrote it made me feel as if I was just thrown into an ocean and told to 'swim.' While I try to read it I feel like I am just sinking. I am given little to no background of why Zelda is researching and near a nervous breakdown. You do not need to reveal everything, in fact in your attempt you made several mysteries which almost make up for your blunder with Midna.
Remember the readers do not know whats going through your mind when you write this, something that makes perfect sense to you, may infact be as confusing as nuclear physics.
I suggest you rewrite it, give the readers more information on why she is searching. What makes her feel as if she is starting to have a nervous break down. Not everything, but enough to allow readers to have a chance at swimming to land
As for your response.
1) that makes sense.
2) I AM thinking like a ruler. You seem to want to protray Zelda as a strong character. I do not expect her to break down and start crying like a baby. I expect her to assemble a small army together to help rebuild Ordon. She just lets the guard lay there while she goes off researching.
If I were a ruler, I would have perosnally seen to that my best friends town was properly taken care of. You could have easily had her give orders to Guard Captain to send help to Ordon. then go research.
I suggest that you rewrite the first chapter or atleast add something like this. The way you have it now, she seems like a clueless leader.
Editing is a writers best friend
Trust me, I have rewritten one of my larger stories. Of course the reason I had to rewrite it is because I had been foolish and payed little attention to the story. I kept putting in smaller details and then forgetting about them later on. I mean my character could speak to animals, had a horse, and was attacked by a werewolf. After the small incidents I forgot all about them. here I was bashing about some shows poor continuity! So I rewrote the entire story, of course it turned into something much different then the first draft. But it was much, MUCH better then the original.