Hello there! I don't know if you had noticed Shotty's post in the homeroom, but he has decided to let me teach you. I'm just a wee TA, but I'll be undertaking the job of training yourself and your character.

Having read Atropos' profile, I must say, I really have become extremely interested in her. She is a marvellous character. I'm not quite sure why, but she reminds me a lot of X-Men, which is a good thing by the way.

Now, onto your post, madam Lysis. It is well written and all round, really quite good, however, I'm the slightest bit disappointed. After having read Atropos' bio, I was hoping for something more. I'm not saying that this was by any means a weak post, but simply that I think you are capable of better. Don't let that take away from what you've written though. It really is very good, it's better than what I would expect from most new students.

I don't really feel it's necessary for me to go through it and rip it to pieces seeing as there is a nice flow and no glaring grammar problems. If you wish, I can do a considerably more in-depth analysis, just PM me about it if you'd like that.

Now, onwards! Seeing as I find Atropos interesting, I'm going to start with an IC post, something that I don't generally do.

IC:

Mesfido waited patiently in the wide halls of the Arrivals Room. His bare back rested heavily against the thick marble. His arms were flowed across his burly chest. He was tired; it had been a long day to say the least. His cobalt eyes skimmed over the face of a large, ornate clock on the opposite side of the room. It was late, as was she. The Domerii had told him that she would be arriving in the early evening, it was almost midnight.

Tardiness was something that Mesfido had never quite learned to appreciate. For her own sake, this new student had best have a good reason for keeping him waiting. He knew full well that most of the Dome’s students were unaware of its existence until they first entered it, he had been one of those students himself, but this was bordering on ridiculous. Never before had the fallen angel heard of the Domerii getting an arrival time so horribly wrong. In his current mood, he was assuming that the student had been delayed somehow. Needless to say, he was tiring of waiting.

Finally, a figure stepped through the allocated door. Mesfido let out a sigh of relief. He shifted himself from his position against the wall, and strode forward to greet her.

OoC:

Assignment Time!

Alright, for your first assignment, I want you to have Atropos enter through those ornate doors. Mesfido, as described in the above IC post, will be there waiting for her. He will approach her, and greet her, explaining who he is, and what the Dome is. How Atropos reacts is completely up to you. At the very least, keep in mind that the Dome is a safe haven. Regardless as to whether or not Atropos takes kindly to having an angel come up to her and proclaim himself her teacher, Mesfido will tell her about her private quarters in the Dome, an area that is solely her own. He will offer to take her there, she can accept or decline. Either way, I want you to have Atropos wander around the Dome, with or without the company of her teacher.

She is to visit some of the Dome’s stationary rooms, such as the Cafeteria, the Gardens, the Infirmary and the Training Grounds – you can of course invent any other areas you would like to. If Mesfido is with her, I want to see plenty of conversation, if he isn’t I want to see lots of thought.

I want you to end your post with Atropos finally finding her room, finish with her standing outside the door. If Mesfido accompanied her, he will tell her that in the morning, he will be calling in on her. If he does not, before she leaves him in the Arrivals Room, he will relay the same piece of information.

600 word minimum. Keep in mind that Mesfido isn’t in the best of moods right now. He won’t make that obvious, he will still try to be understanding and helpful, but if Atropos gives him cheek or treats him disrespectfully, he will be quick to scold her, that doesn't mean he'll lose his calm though. You will need to read up on Mesfido before you write this next piece, his profile can be found by clicking on the image in my sig. Best of luck!