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Old 06-09-2007, 06:20 PM
Bobby Emerald Bobby Emerald is a male United States Bobby Emerald is offline
A voice of reason.
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Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: New York. Wotsitooya?
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Re: (Com) Donkey Kong 64 Parody [T]

Sorry I haven't updated in a while, lots of things have come up lately...

[b]Chapter 2- Show Me the Way!
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DK: Aw, MAN! That damn potion got to my head...gotta...rest...

DK: *climbing the tree to his house* *falls off and busts his ass*
AHHHH! MY TUSH!! FOR THE GOOD GRACE OF KAZOOIE, GET RID OF THIS PAIN!

Kazooie: Who called?

DK: …You know...I didn't really expect you to come.

Kazooie: ...SO WHAT?

DK: Um...well, since you're here...HEAL MY BUTTOCKS!

Kazooie: ...You're crazy. Call me for something that's worth my time, will ya?*flies off*

DK: HEY! WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT ABOUT!?! COME BACK HERE! NOOOOO!

DK is seen running blindly around in wide, chaotic circles. He accidentally bumps into a wall

DK: Ouch. At least my tush feels better...but now I have a hell of a headache! Now where’s the exit to this damn cooped up place? *runs inside a cave* WTF? A dead end? NOOOO-hey! Coins! *picks up three coins* I wonder what these are for?

Bat 1: They're for spending, stupid.

Bat 2: Yeah, SPENDING!

DK: How come I didn't see you there before?

Bat 1: Cause you're an idiot.

Bat 2: Yeah, IDIOT!

DK: Whatever, look, just tell me where to get out of this forsaken place...

Bat 2: IDIOT!

DK: *pointing at Bat 2* If you don't shut up now, I'll rip your wings off.

Bat 1: Hey, that wasn't nice...lets jump him!

Bat 2: ....

Bat 1: What now?

Bat 2: ....

Bat 1: Say something!

Bat 2: *mumbling* Something?

DK: THAT'S IT! YOU'RE A DEAD BAT NOW! *leaps toward Bat 2 and misses by an inch*

Bat 2: Ahhh! *flies out the cave*

Bat 1: Gerald! NOOOOO!

Bat 2: *sees the sun* *dies*

Bat 1: *cries* I'm all alone...

DK: *flies out the cave and falls in the pond* Hey! I can breathe underwater! COOL! And my head feels better! YAY! *swimming around, gathering oranges* This should be a sport!


DK jumps out of the lake only to find another cave.


DK: What the hell? This better be the exit...*walks inside to find a switch with his face on it*

DK: COOL! A switch with my face on it! I must be famous….

Bobby: Dude, you live on an ISLAND!

DK: So? What’s that supposed to-HEY! You can’t be here!

Bobby: I can be here if I want to. So HAH! IN YOUR UGLY FACE!

DK: …Whatever.


DK then butt stomps the switch, causing the gate to open.


DK: Oh, a way out. FINALLY!


DK walks out unto the sunny Isle of DK….wait, does that make sense?


Squawks: *SQUAWK* Welcome to your isle, DK. Enjoy the rushing waterfalls and the light rays of the sun while you can, cause K. Rool is back.

DK: No way...not that dumb bastard again!

Squawks: *SQUAWK* Yeah, and the only thing I could find that wasn't blocked off was that big dome connected to K. Rool's island...so, good luck with your adventure...

DK: Wait, thats it? Just good luck? No more info?

Squawks: Nope. No more info.

DK: Are you sure?

Squawks: *BWARK* Yeah, I'm sure. *flies off*

DK: Sheesh, just a bit more would be nice...what about these little pads? What the hell am I supposed to do with em?

Squawks: *SQUAWK* Oh yeah, those pads are for teleporting. Find two of each number pad so they are connected...

DK: This sounds like a telly phone...

Squawks: Shut up and listen. Now, when they are connected, crouch on one of them to be sent into oblivion!

DK: Why oblivion?

Squawks: Um, I made that up, sorry. You can bananaport between them.

DK: Why must everything here be banana themed? I mean, we gorrilas and apes get PAID to eat those things. Thank God they have decent taste.

Squawks: *BWARK* My work here is done for now. So later...

DK: Yeah...sure...*scratches head*
--------------------

Wow, that took awhile!
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ZU Christian

My B.A. character: SSJ

Bobby E, you're a baddy daddy lamatai tebby chai. ~ Iroas

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Originally Posted by Lelouch View Post
Unfortunately everyone's asses are on their seats, so I'm stuck to finding other ways of occupying my time in class.
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