A Brawl Match to End the Ages

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Written by Jason

Wednesday, 26 March 2008

Unless you've been living under a rock, you know that lackluster Zelda webmaster Dennis Wyman, aka Captain Cornflake, has challenged me to a match in Super Smash Bros. Brawl to settle our rather poignant differences once and for all. I'll be taking him down on March 29th, to the tune of a $10,000 bet.

"Capn" (or simply "Loser") is owner of ZeldaInformer.com, a competing (hah) Zelda site. Ever since he broke off from ZU, we've been having feud upon feud. At least now that he's showing his face he's doing it in a manly way. Over the internet.

But enough ado. Here are the terms of the match:

The Place: A non-descript series of tubes, and possibly my choice stage in Brawl.
The Time: Saturday, March 29th. As soon as we're both around.
The Bet: $10,000. Ten thousand dollars. That's my big sack of gold I keep in the vault you guys don't see.
The Terms: Stock five-life battle, no items whatsoever (no Smash Ball). Capn will play as Captain Falcon, I will play as Link. The stage is my choosing - I chose the Bridge of Eldin.

To answer the most common question: Will it be videoed? The answer: Are you nuts? Of course it will be. And youtube'd. You'll get to see me kick Capn's arse come the 29th - and believe me, I will kick it hard.

(To protect myself, I will state that this is neither the donators nor ZU's money being bet, but rather my own out-of-pocket cash. ZU will not suffer in any way, nor will the revamp, should I lose this match somehow. But I won't, so no worries.)

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Comments (26) add comment

Noscreenname said:

Whoa, that's really cool! Can't wait to see you pound the Cap'n.

But seriously, $10,000??? Wow.

March 26, 2008

Euphoria said:

I can't even imagine betting that much money. You are insane. Some call it being assured of yourself, I call it stupidity.

March 26, 2008

aeroman said:

some that capn to win are urging you to bet the site

March 26, 2008

Brayden said:

Kick his butt

March 26, 2008

K zee said:

can u send me a youtube link to the match at This e-mail address is being protected from spam bots, you need JavaScript enabled to view it
p.s. after the battle tell me wat exactly happened between u 2

March 26, 2008

UnderworldKing said:

Hey hope you win. When you get the outcome of the battle can you send a youtube link also to me at This e-mail address is being protected from spam bots, you need JavaScript enabled to view it . If its okay with you I'd even like to set up the link on my site.

March 26, 2008 | url

Glass said:

Guys, Jason will probably be too busy counting his new found money, so instead of emailing the link, I bet he's just gonna post a link to the video here on ZU.

March 26, 2008

Tonchiki said:

Jason, I can't tell if you and Cap'n are joking or not. I seriously can't. I really hope so, because otherwise is a little frightening, honestly.

March 26, 2008

Twilight_King11 said:

10, fricken, thousand dollars. Where do you get this money?!

March 26, 2008

Hyrule said:

The stakes are crazy. You're both crazy.

... And Din takes no sides.

March 26, 2008

Topo_Gego said:

April Fool's!

Haha.

March 26, 2008

Noscreenname said:

Yeah, it'll probably take 3 days to put up the video, if you see what I mean. It was pretty clever, though. I fell for it.

March 26, 2008

kan2tan said:

:O 10,000 dollars!??! r u serious? LOL damn dats intense

March 27, 2008

Artorium said:

VIVA LA ZU! Go Jason

March 27, 2008

trashbeast said:

you .. have 10,000 dollars laying around.... to bet on a video game... ? and.. ?? nevermind..

March 27, 2008

PhantomLink101 said:

i'm really hoping you win however that's an outrageous bet. Sorry though Captain Falcon's my guy. Good luck with that one...

March 27, 2008

Last Hylian said:

I'm putting all my prejudice against ZU aside because Captain Cornflake is a jerk.... GO JASON!

March 27, 2008

capn fan said:

w00t go capn

March 27, 2008

Tonchiki said:

Yeah, this has gotta be some big April Fool's thing. Even though April Fool's is in APRIL, which it currently isn't.

March 27, 2008

JoshuaLuskRocks (AIM) said:

lol, awesome! Good Luck!!!

March 27, 2008 | url

FierceDeity said:

I've been on this site long enough to respcet the Captain. Jason's a newbie in my eyes.

March 27, 2008

Kokiri Mage7 said:

April Fool's? We'll see, but I figure Jason will kick Cap'n around a bit, anyhow. Good luck, dude!

Have a greatly heroic day!

March 28, 2008

gamefreak510 said:

can I play ageinst you guys!!^^
j/k

March 28, 2008

Rach Tul said:

If you check the forums, you'll find that Jason has posted a picture of the document both him and Cap'n signed. For anyone who didn't know, both webmasters are betting their respective sites along with the $10,000 bet. ZU is worth more than ZI (Zelda Informer), so Jason has more at stake. I personally hope Jason wins.

March 29, 2008

UnderworldKing said:

Jason said he wasn't betting this site or anything to do with it.

March 29, 2008 | url

Rach Tul said:

Yes he is, read the update slightly above this one. Like I said, if you go to the forums, you would see that they posted a picture of the legally-binding document.

March 29, 2008

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